Anxiety - too scared to sleep. Anyone ?
Posted , 7 users are following.
Hi. I apologise if this post is a bit long, I need to start from the beginning so you get the full picture.
I am 24 years old and have always been an anxious person, even as a child - my mum took me to the doctors many times as I was a nervous wreck especially if I had to try something new or if there was any arguing loud noises i used to get mini panic attacks, so going to school petrefied me, playtime was hell. The Doctor just labeled me a sensitive child who liked quiet basically.
By the time I got to secondary school I wasn't as bad loud noises didn't bother me anymore. I started getting badly bullied in secondary school I was quiet and an easy target in the end my anxiety came back and I was having panic attacks again sometimes at school .
When I left school i met my partner who I've been with 8 years now and had 3 children , although I sometimes had heart palpitations and a bit of a wobbly it didn't happen often at all, I was very happy .
Then in February 2015 everything changed.
My dad passed away suddenly. He was only 46 and me and him were extremely close, he was my best friend and he also suffered from anxiety (mostly social) and if I ever had an attack I would phone him and he would calm me down and talk me through it. He was my rock. The only person I could tell everything too and not feel like a freak. He died because of a blocked artery which caused his heart to stop. It was very sudden and very quick.
Ever since this has happened my anxiety has been through the roof- I feel like Im going mad. I haven't slept a full night since he passed away. I am absolutely terrified to go to sleep Im petrefied I won't wake up. I stay awake until it starts getting light and then I feel safer and fall asleep. I have 3 children and Im a walking zombie. I also have health problems which cause chronic pain and fatigue, the pain killers I'm on and the lack of sleep mean that when my kids are at school I spend most of the time lead down trying to build up some energy for when they come home. Because I lie down a lot I'm convinced I'm not getting enough exercise and that's going to cause a heart attack, I also drink energy drinks 2 a day sometimes because it gives me a little boost nothing g else does And I then panic because there not good for you. Then I panic about my pain killers because taking pain killers long term isn't good for you.. but I need to if Im going to be able to live my life. I also smoke but I've cut down massively with help from the smoking clinic and am well on my way to giving up though it does worry me too. I'm literally a wreck. My doctor prescribed sertraline, but they made my anxiety worse which they can do until they start too work so my dr gave me diazepam too take along side the sertraline until the side effects pass. The medication seems too be helping during the day but as soon as it's time to sleep it's back. I feel so Ill from lack of sleep headaches and nausea all the time which also makes me think something is wrong and I'm going to die even though i know what causes it.I've been too the hospital a few times had ecg and bloods done etc all came back fine and was told by one of the nurses that it's all in my head .. I know that! I just want it to stop. My partner doesn't understand he says things like just go to sleep you won't be anxious when yr sleeping. He's not horrible he just doesn't understand. He's never had anxiety before . I just want to know if any one else experiences this? Or am I actually going mad? Sometimes I fear I'm losing my mind. I'm sorry for the really long post I just had to get it out there in the hope someone might have some advice xxx
0 likes, 12 replies
beth441992
Posted
Johzaeem_91 beth441992
Posted
Go to bed the same time everyday
Take light food before sleep and avoid fatty meals
Exercise in evenings helps a lot.
These factora practiced rwgularly can improve sleep hygiene and helped me a lot.
Hollylujah beth441992
Posted
You are not alone! When I went through a period of Panic Disorder sleeping was the worst because every night I knew with absolute certainty I was going to die. I would lay awake, toss and turn, it was TERRIBLE. I would wake my husband and make him tell me I wasn't dying! To him it seemed irrational, but to me it wasn't. However, I expressed to him how important it was for him to do this for me (at a time that I wasn't in the midst of anxiety) and it helped a lot.
That was two years ago. Since then I've been through intense cognitive therapy and I no longer suffer from panic or anxiety. It was a long road though. One thing I realized is I've spent more nights living than dying. Even though I was 100% sure! The thing about anxiety (which I know you know) is that it is irrational. You are not going to suddenly die in your sleep. You've had too many doctors and tests look at you for that to happen.
I understand that anxiety doesn't really care what the doctors say, which is why I really recommend therapy. You have to reteach your mind to relax. Also, it sounds like talking things out really helped you with your dad!
One thing i did was take magnesium before bed. It helps with anxiety and it makes you tired (although it can also give you diarrhea). I would also do a relaxation technique whee I would tense and then relax each muscle in my body (you can YouTube walk through for this)
I would also read really cheesey superficial love story books... I actually hate them in a way, but there was something comforting about knowing everyrhinf was going to work out in the end and it distracted me from my thoughts.
Anyway... You're not alone, you are NOT losing your mind, and you can overcome this! I hope this helps. Good luck!
beth441992 Hollylujah
Posted
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and reply I'm glad to hear you are now anxiety free. Well done! I'm going to look into cognitive therapy as I've heard it's really good. I should have done it so long ago but I was so scared of admitting how I feel to someone and getting judged and thought to be a freak, I know in there profession they deal with a lot of people with many problems worse than mine and it's there job to help not judge! So I just need to bite the bullet and do it. I agree with you about books as I love reading I don't read love stories as such but the books I do read are happy books and in a weird way it's comforting to know that everything works out in the end even though it's only a story . Thank you again for replying . Take care. Bx
Hollylujah beth441992
Posted
It took me a long time to bite that bullet as well. I'm actually in school to become a therapist and in school alone I've learned that there is nothing you can say that will shock a therapist or make them judge you! It's definitely a journey and take hard work, but I promise it's worth it!
gino78308 beth441992
Posted
Hi Beth you our not going crazy the thaught of dying nearly sent me crazy until I meet this great doctor who said Gino I got same news for you and I said what he said that dying in not a rare condition it happens to all of use so it's not so rare really I said so you our going to die he said yes I am that made me feel good see doc we do have something in common we ore going to die my mum died in my arms I took care of her she died of cancer it was beautiful till the end my mum was still there she said to be before she died Gino let tomorrow take care of its self promise me you will take care of tomorrow better still just focus on the now this moment so when I find my mind wandering I stop my self and focus on the now
gino78308
Posted
rina57622 beth441992
Posted
Hi Beth,
I'm so sorry you are struggling during bedtime! When I was married and my anxiety would creep up at night I would lay down next to my husband and put my hand on his heart... this sounds a little nuts but it calmed me and helped me fall asleep. Try it! And breathe focus on your breathing start it before your anxiety comes. Do this often through the day and into the evening before bed also. I hope this helps... I hope you have a peacful sleep💞
beth441992 rina57622
Posted
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and reply. I actually do the same when im in bed. I put my hand on my partners chest it does bring some comfort mainly because I get worried that the same will happen to him that happened to dad and feeling his heartbeat reassures me he's ok. The main problem is not being able to sleep i just can't switch off. I'm going to talk to the Dr about increasing my dose of my meds and hopefully they should kick in and hopefully it will be onwards and upwards. Thanks again for yr reply take care bx
frazzled beth441992
Posted
Your father's dead was an extreme trauma for you. I'm not surprised that you are suffering so. You've lost a person who you could confide in who was of tremendous help to you -- losing a parent is so very hard to accept and it's scary because he was so young.. Dealing with that alone will put anyone on a roller coaster ride.
You are on that roller coaster right now. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture used by the military. It can drive you into a deep depression and you don't want to go there because you have children to care for. If may benefit you to increase your dose of diazepam (speak to doc about that).
Sertraline is used for obsessive thinking -- exactly what you are doing by not wanting to sleep because you worry about not waking up. An increase in this med might be beneficial. You are doing what my psychiatrist calls "stinkin thinking" and all that's going to get you is more of it.
Your lack of sleep may be the underlying cause of the rest of the symptoms you mentioned. Have you tried melatonin (an over the counter drug for sleep)? You are coming down way to hard on yourself considering what you've been thru. You have to realize and accept this and give yourself a break. Change your routine while the children are at school. There are lots of things you can do without putting out a lot of energy. Soak in tub of Epson salts will restore magnesium which you are prob. low on. Turn on music, if you like it and slow dance. Don't matter how you dance just move your body to get your blood flowing. Do stretching exercises and make something different for dinner. Read about obsessive compulsive disease (OCD), look for a group in your area for depression and seek out the help of a church and the people who attend.
You must get moving. May God help you to get motivated. Sending vibes of strength.
beth441992 frazzled
Posted
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and reply! I will definitely speak too my Dr about an increase in my meds , I think I may also speak to a councillor too see if that helps. I will try melatonin to see if that helps, lack of sleep really does make things worse. I think that's the first thing I need to concentrate on as I'm sure the lack of sleep is what's causing all my other anxieties. It's good to know I'm not going mad 😉 thanks again for the reply . Take care. Bx
debbie04720 beth441992
Posted
Ditch the meds and read this article - do some deep breathing before bed - you need to activate your Parasympathietic nervous system. I couldn't sleep for years and read this, I did the breathing and now I sleep deeply every night. Good luck.xxx
http://healthvibed.com/relaxation-101-how-to-activate-the-pns/
Do 2 minutes of yogic breathing (google it) before bed and it will calm your nervous system down and prepare you for sleep. Meditating 20 minutes a day an hour before bed will also help. Honestly I tried EVERYTHING and this has worked for me - persist and it will pay off. Good luck.xx