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Anxious and crying please help

Posted , 6 users are following.

Chelii
Chelii

Hi, 

I started taking this SSRI (10mg) 2 days ago. It is to help with anxiety and stress around exams and studying. 

I am so reluctant to take medication of this kind as it feels like I am giving up. No longer fighting. And potentially losing a part of myself, as i dont know how the pill will affect me. I dont want to feel numb. 

I am usually a very happy person and i bring that happiness into the lives of many. Now i cant even find 1 positive thought for myself. Everything is negative. I see no upside, and dont believe I am good enough to pass exams and remember things despite evidance to the contrary. 

All this aside the pills have increased my anxiety alot. I am currently in bed and cant get out. Crying. Shaking. And scared as i no longer want this feeling. 

My partner told me today "i cant do this anymore, I am here for u and I will listen but I cant help you" she is drained and past her limits. Makes me feel even more alone. 

I am seeing a psychologist for the first time in my life tomorrow and I am very scared. I need help and want help but I am scared of t as well. Possibly be ause gettin it makes me feel weak. 

Any advice. Stories. Is anyone else feeling like me? 

0 likes, 9 replies

9 Replies

  • gill28325
    gill28325 Chelii

    Posted

    Iam so sorry to here your not good!!!!

    First of all you have to realise why your so poorly! Have you had a trauma a worry a emotional incident

    You say your partner cant cope !! We'll bums to them your at a time when you need support if youd broken your leg theyd have to help you!!!!!!!!

    I have found cits amazing nut its a long road 4 to 5 weeks and you feel worse before you feel better

    But Take them get them in your system!!

    Counselling and cbt help a lot while your waiting but you can fight this!!!!!!!

    Life is for living

    Keep strong

    • Chelii
      Chelii gill28325

      Posted

      Hi Gill, 

      Thank u so much for the support. 

      I am usually the happy one that chears everyone up, copes amazingly under stress and succeeds. 

      But i have lost that part of me. I will remain strong despite wantin to quit. Scared that the pill is goin to make me numb, and change me, but i have been told it wont. How did it affect the way u think and feel? I perform well with a certain amount of stress especially during exam time etc as it motivates me. 

      I am scared the pill will take all of that 'healthy' anxiety and stress away. 

      And i am the type of person who needs that from time to time. 

    • gill28325
      gill28325 Chelii

      Posted

      If you read all the peoples messages they were all the strong person in the crowd the funny person the loveable person!

      Everybody who knows me are shocked ive been the chosen one!!

      Most people I dont tell because people are twats and don't understand! ! (Lost a lot of so called friends)

      In a weird way this illness has made me more of a person ! I had a breakdown 17 years ago and it changed my life I've read more accumalated so much knowledge analysis different treatments and drugs and lived with it!!

      What you must do is live with it dont fight it!!!

      The drugs do not make you numb the dont make you slurry or uncommunicative! !

      They do make your anxiety greater for a while bit buzzing hot sweats but thats totally normal FIGHT IT!!!!!!!!!

    • Chelii
      Chelii gill28325

      Posted

      U seem strong Gill. I dont know u but that makes me happy. It means there is one less person in the world giving in to this! 

      And yes, its all the happy ones that seem to be hit over the head with this. 

      I suppose seeing the positive u where lucky, there is nothin worse than having a fake person in your crowd. 

      I will try an fight. Just still scared the pills will change me. And make life more complicated. 

      Thank you for the advice and support 

  • reasoning51
    reasoning51 Chelii

    Posted

    SSRI's tend to enhance the negative effects for first few weeks. If is just for exam stress I'd have though beta blockers would have been amuch better option rather than going on to anti depresants
    • Chelii
      Chelii reasoning51

      Posted

      Well as mentioned i am a very happy person normally, however i started getting very anxious and stressed durin my previous exams, and never fully recovered, and my friends say im just not myself anymore. 

      I recently found out about my next exams and the prep and anticipation for those have triggered an intense anxiety. To the point where i stayed in bed for 4 days crying.

      I mentioned to my DR that my mother us currently on antidepressants and my dad has also been but is refusing to take them. After hearing this she suggested the pills. 

      I will ask about the bta blockers none the less.

      Thank you very much 

  • Adeplume
    Adeplume Chelii

    Posted

    There is nothing weak about seeking help. There is something weak about hiding from a problem and not seeking help. Having sought help, wait until the medication has started to act on the problem. These are not instant happy pills they are to address a chemical imbalance in your system and they take time to acheive that balance. You will feel better, be sure of that. You will breeze through your exams. You don't have to get out of bed to study so study in bed.

    Your partner is quite right, she can't take any of your symptoms away from you they are for you to bear but she says she will listen and do what she can so take comfort from the fact that she cares, it shouldn't make you feel alone, that is unfair to her. Psychologists, by all accounts, do not bite. in fact they, as experts in what we go through before we even try medication they are good at advising on any change of behaviour that may help.

    It will take longer than a couple of days and you will feel rubbish off and on over the next couple of weeks but you WILL feel better, You WILL return to your old self, you WILL get good results and I wish you all the luck in the world.

  • mpeni
    mpeni Chelii

    Posted

    Hi Chelii,

    Sorry to hear things arent good for you. It takes a good 4-5 weeks for the drug to work. Some people react quicker than others and some not. The first 2-3 weeks are very hard as your body is trying to adjust. Your anxiety unfortunately will get worse before it gets better and you may experience some side effects. Hang in there though its worth the wait. Things will get better. I know its a lot to ask at the moment, but all you can do is try to stay positive, get into a routine and keep busy. Most importantly look after your health, food, exercise etc Its great you are seeing a psycologist, they maybe able to help, my therapist helped me a great deal.

    If you are still experiencing sevre anxiety or side effects, please see your GP they will be able to advise the best course of action or you might need your dosage increased.

    Remember, you are not alone, we are all here to hep you get through this. The support and help on this forum is fantastic and is a real life saver.

    Hope you feel better soon.

    Keep us updated

    Take care and look after yourself

    Regards

    Marcel.

  • vitamaria12787
    vitamaria12787 Chelii

    Posted

    Hey  chelii I want to tell you that you are not alone I am on the same boat I am scared to take medication and felt it made me worse NoW don't listen to me on that because it very well could have been me creating a problem. I will say I have been seeing a therapist and it is nothing to be scared of it's actually nice. Someone who gets it, someone who will tell you .. You are not crazy. Your spouse doesn't sound that supportive and you don't need that extra stress right now stay strong I know it's hard trust me I have negative thoughts all day every day and anxious and pano attacks and I am scared to take the medication but I wills. U are strong 
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