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Anxious, no friends, negative thoughts

Posted , 4 users are following.

rather74877
rather74877

Over the past 3 years I've practically shut myself out of every social situation I can think of, not because of fear but because I'd rather be playing video games. Over the course of those 3 years I've lost all my friends and postponed school, work, and relationships. Coming to this point where I realize what I've done I became anxious, no friends, no one to talk to, no school, and practically no life. I'm not sure what to do at this point. When I leave my home i'm always alone with no one to talk to and it makes me really self concious, I'm always worried about what people think of me and when people laugh or smile around me I assume it's because of something to do with me, I feel like I no longer have the social skills I use to, I remember always being easily able to talk to anybody and be social and enjoy my time with whoever I meet and make sure to leave a great impression but now no matter who I talk to I just feel like a huge loser who is just wasting their time or just someone who they'll talk to their friends and laugh about later over something I said or did. Aside from that, I get anxious thinking to much considering the fact that I have no one to talk to I just think about non sense, things that never happened like horrible images in my head that just make me uncomfortable and just worsen my anxiety and make it harder to do anything at all and I just find myself stuck on these ridiculous ideas and things that could potentially happen to me when I know full well they wont and never have but I still feel like I'm purposely torturing myself with things that just aren't true and I cannot figure out why. 

Right now I've got another month to wait before I begin school again and hopefully start getting my life back together and In the mean time i have picked up some sports but I really feel like I am just so lost and afraid and I have no idea what to do, whenever i go out to do anything im just worried anxious and it heavily impairs whatever I try to do and makes it harder because I'm afraid of looking foolish.

I tried to vent as much as i could hopefully this made sense, any advice would be appreciated.

0 likes, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • michaelall35712
    michaelall35712 rather74877

    Posted

    First I am sorry you that you feel this way.  I know the feelings to well. I to will isolate to much which is not healthy.  You seem to be suffering with a low self esteem. Think about things that you enjoy other than video games?  The good thing is your Seek counseling?  Look up on the internet on ways to build self esteem, positive self talk, positive affirmations.  You mentioned you are going back to school.  Possibly find a mental health counselor in your school to talk with your problems and concerns.  Wish you the best.
  • Guest
    Guest rather74877

    Posted

    What do you do for fun? What makes you feel good?
  • carole28488
    carole28488 rather74877

    Posted

    Hi, rather:  I'm so sorry to hear that you feel this way.  I have a similar problem.  My whole life I have had low self esteem, and I was so shy in school that no one even knew my name. When I got married, I wanted it to last forever, but after 15 yrs. of marriage and two daughters, my "then" husband left me for a woman with lots of money.

    I found Mr. Perfect, but he committed suicide due to severe depression just a few months before we were to be married.  I find myself alone now, and I have a lot of health issues.

    I have taken to my bedroom where my big tv is, and my precious three doxie dogs.  That is the only place I want to be,,I call it my comfort zone..I often have to go to the doctor or to the grocery store, and I get physically sick while walking in the aisles or sitting in the office...I'm not sure if I am really physically ill or if it is anxiety from being outside my comfort zone.  I went through a long spell where I was completely "normal", but this has popped up in the last few months. Unlike me, you are so young, so I urge you to not let this ruin your life like it has mine. I've lived so many years fighting anxiety/depression and missed out on so much of what life has to offer.  I still fight it to this day.  Luckilly, I'm retired and don't have to work because I would never be able to hold down a job at this point...Take care, sweetie...Fight this with everything you have in you...Hope this helps to let you know you are NOT alone...HUGS.

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