Arial & Lonely

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Good morning to you both.

I hope you both slept well and feeling better this morning ~ even if only a little better.

Don't try and cope alone, we are all here for you.

Love

Melbi xxx

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Melbi

    well as usual not off to a good start. Didn't properly rise until 11.30. Feeling pretty rough for most of the day. Having seen my tharapist I didn't feel much better, but decided to at least try to be more positive. I decided to meet my daughter after she finished work and suggested a coffee. This did help. I know that if I had gone straight home I would have ended up on the bed again. Managing to get through the evening and feel I can actually do something. I guess my mood must have lifted because normally I have to force myself to do things with thoughts circling constantly in my head, which is a real battle. Everytime I have an evening like this I pray that it will continue into the next day. I will have to pray harder.

    XArialX

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  • Posted

    Morning Arial

    It's a viscious circle isn't it. I'm the same, everything takes a lot of effort to do but once I'm doing something I do actually start to feel a bit better.

    Is this because when we are doing something it pre-occupies our minds? If so, then by forcing ourselves to do things, is that a good thing or bad thing? Surely by taking our minds of things we are just burying our problems in the sand.

    I have planned over the next 4 weeks to force myself to do things regardless as to whether I want to do them or how much effort it takes but at the same time I have promised myself a couple of hours each afternoon to just lie on my bed and allow my mind to race, my feelings to come out.

    In short - plenty of exercise but plenty of rest too!

    How long have you been on citalopram?

    Melbi xxx

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  • Posted

    Hi Melbi

    thanks again. Every day is torture and I can only see one way out. My family would never forgive me. Have been on Med since 17th Dec 10mg to start and am now up to 60mg. My Dr said that this

    will make a difference, i am still waiting. No therapist can help me. My husband says that with the right medication and time I will be able to make decisions about my life. I can't see it, I can't look forward and plan. Everyday is a nightmare.

    Arial

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  • Posted

    [quote:3ef131b08e=\"Arial1\"]Hi Melbi

    thanks again. Every day is torture and I can only see one way out. My family would never forgive me. Have been on Med since 17th Dec 10mg to start and am now up to 60mg. My Dr said that this

    will make a difference, i am still waiting. No therapist can help me. My husband says that with the right medication and time I will be able to make decisions about my life. I can't see it, I can't look forward and plan. Everyday is a nightmare.

    Arial[/quote:3ef131b08e]

    Hi Arial

    A few things I'd like to say - please don't take offence at any of them.

    There is more than one way out - it takes a great deal of time, effort and energy - but you can do it.

    You say the doctor put you on 60 mg of citalopram and you are still waiting - waiting for what sweetheart? Waiting for a magic cure from the tablets? It won't happen - believe me. All the tablets will do (hopefully) is give you enough of a boost to give you a kick start - unfortunately the rest is up to.

    No therapist can help you? Arial, you are setting yourself up to fail before you have even tried. How do you know no therapist can help you? Have you tried them all? I agree that no therapist can wave a magic wand and cure you from your illness - again it takes a lot of hard work and effort from you too.

    Why the rush to make decisions for the future? The future isn't here yet and hey! The best thing about the future is it will always be there when you are ready. Until then, forget the future, concentrate on the present!

    At the moment I am concentrating on plans for the day I am living - so today I plan to go to my mums for a few hours. Doesn't sound much does it but to get there I am going to have to shower, dress and leave the house (alone). Whilst there I can't tell her I'm just going to go and have a lie down because I feel crap. So what might appear as something so bloody simple to a person who isn't ill - it is a huge step for me.

    Yesterday I woke and planned to go to the shop, again alone, Yes, I achieved it :D

    What I'm trying to say Arial is make tiny, tiny steps. Don't even consider the future or try and plan huge decisions or anything - all this will achieve is more stress, anxiety and depression because right now you aren't capable of achieving them - why set yourself up to fail?

    Each day set yourself one small target - when you have achieved it (and you will providing you are realistic in your choice of target) praise yourself for your achievement - be proud of yourself for achieving it.

    It could be that today you will post one positive comment about yourself on the 'Cheer up, the worst is yet to come' thread.

    Trust me, that is more difficult than it sounds. I really struggled yesterday with that one :oops:

    All I could come up with were negatives - I got there in the end though but I had to really think hard.

    Give it a go - for me and everyone else here.

    We are all here for you Arial - but you have to be there for you too.

    Take care

    Love Melbi xxx

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  • Posted

    Hi Arial and Melbi,

    Arial I really feel for you. It can be so frustrating when you just can't think through a problem, like \"Why am I standing gazing into the fridge?\", and you don't realise for ten minutes that your coffee is cold and you needed the milk. To quote Melbi recently, \"BAH\". And 60 mg has been prescribed for a reason. Please keep posting here, negative or positive, if you write the way you feel you will resonate with others who in turn will post their thoughts and you gradually come to realise what a wonderfully caring community we have here.

    Melbi, you amaze me again. I know your own life has a few knots, yet you are able to offer such loving caring practical advice. I hope your daughters, granddaughter and your partner still contribute to your positive outlook. Take care of you. xxx

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  • Posted

    Breezman: [i:2dfefe5fe5]Melbi, you amaze me again. I know your own life has a few knots, yet you are able to offer such loving caring practical advice[/i:2dfefe5fe5]

    LOL Breezman, I amaze myself - how easy it is to offer advice - shame it isn't as easy to follow my own advice :shock: NO. no no - LOL - I am starting to - honest :?

    Seriously though, we can all see where each other needs help and support, we can all guide each other in the right direction - what we all seem to struggle with is seeing where ourselves need to help ourselves.

    Melbi xxx

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  • Posted

    Hi Melbi

    I understand what you are saying, I have been making myself do things everyday but nothing gets easier. I even started a computercourse in Jan but I am contstantly misersble. Even though I have passed three modules but even that doesn't cheer me. I am losing the fight, everyday. Those few snippets I have had of feeling a little more like myself are good but they are over shadowed for the majority of time. Until I can have more of these times I can't move on and take a grip of my life.

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  • Posted

    Drop the computer course! Why do something that makes you feel miserable?

    Sounds to me like you might be trying too hard. Take it easy, go with the flow so to speak and allow yourself time to get better before you start trying to do courses etc.

    Good luck and try thinking positively.

    Melbi xxx

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