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So today being Saturday I have had little nudges from the wine witch. She has placed the drinking thoughts into my head even though I know I won't do it. Yes Saturdays without drink is still new to me, this will be my third. 14 days without booze. As I don't drink during the week those days are pretty easy. So I am now telling myself if I drink it will ruin the night I have planned. Movie at home with my husband with the new tv in our bedroom & we are going to spoil ourselves with food in bed. Old Saturday night was similar to this except we would watch a film downstairs & I could pop up to the loo & swig from a hidden bottle in my wardrobe. I then could not concentrate on the film, really enjoy the food & I would always fall asleep on the couch never to see the end of the film.

I can't go back to secret drinking. I have promised myself that this time is it!! I am doing the best I think I have done this time around. I'm not as obsessed with thoughts of drinking & I imaging being sober & awake & in the moment in life. I think I am more confident this time around. I have pulled back from my drinking friends over the last 2 years. I was still drinking at home secretly at the weekend but I was no longer going on drinking sessions with these ladies. That has made it easier to see that what I am doing is for me & my family. I was so caught up before of how will I be socially & all the girls do is meet up & drink how will I now fit in? Now to be honest because I don't see them that much I don't really think about it too much. Knowing me though I could in the future get anxious about that again but for now I'm ok. If not being with that set of friends reduces the anxiety about drinking because they are so into it then maybe I need to try to stay away.

Keep going everyone xxx

1 like, 14 replies

14 Replies

  • Posted

    Honest reply Darken Dee. Well done to you for not giving in. Staying away short term from your drinking buddies is a good idea as well. After some months you will feel stronger and can then start explaining that you no later drink😅 yes they will laugh or stare at you but you need to be honest...best of luck on your journey. Robin

    • Posted

      I agree with Robin, Darken Dee. (I like that name too, I don't know why! You will take a lot of pleasure eventually, telling people that you no longer drink. Inwardly they might feel envious and will respect you for your decision. And after a while I found that they don't offer you alcohol any more. It really feels great. WELL DONE!

  • Posted

    Oops..auto check spelling on tablet no good. So sorry Sadie Dee! Although Darken Dee sounds interesting as a name !?

  • Posted

    Oh well, I just accidentally deleted what I wrote.

    Bummer.

    Repeat:

    So i'm on my 3rd day of "no wine" which is unusual for me as I usually try to do every other day. I have a health condition and alcohol is a huge no no so I have to do it, like it or not.

    I guess its just as well as a person with big anxiety I used to love that wonderful feeling you get to after a glass of wine - the little frigging worry man is turned off in my head and I can sigh in relief and sit back and relax.

    That "wine time" was moving up every day for the last 6 months or so..Maybe start off with an IPA beer and ease into it.

    My husband and I used to drink a bottle every night (shared that is) now he has it all to himself.

    I have morning anxiety and the very idea of that my wine later in the day used to keep me going - count down the hours!

    Now I'm on my own!

    I run, meditate, do yoga and I'm trying to come up with some kind of an Etsy business -even if I never sell one thing - its something to occupy my mind. Good for you - 14 days!!

    • Posted

      Good for you too! Starting an Etsy business is fantastic & hey you never know. I want to get into my creative side more & have time to draw & knit. Drinking always got in the way of this.

      Keep going xx

    • Posted

      Etsy is a site where you can sell your art & craft. Whether it be jewellery designs, Clothing, sculpting etc.....

  • Posted

    Hi Sadie,

    Loving the Wine Witch reference. I also had a problem with the Vodka Vampire, but instead of sucking the vodka out of me, he'd inject it into me on a regular basis!!

    When I stopped drinking, I was terrified that I'd come across as boring and no fun to be out with as I used to drink because I thought it made me more confident and that I'd appear more funny and fit in better. I used to inwardly think that if a person wasn't drinking then there must have been something wrong with them!! My friends now, don't ask if I want a drink, they just get me a diet coke and I really appreciate that they don't question me or make a scene. I can now go out and not drink and do you know what - I actually enjoy myself much more. I can remember getting home, remember conversations and I can wake up and function 100% better than I used to. That's not to say that I don't get the urge to have a drink but I think it might be an urge rather than a craving if that makes sense.

    I think you've done so well for not drinking for 3 weekends. Every weekend you get through is another rung up the ladder. Maybe you could tell your friends that you are not drinking as you are trying for a baby, which is true, but only when you are ready to go out to a pub and feel comfortable without a drink.

    Wishing you all the best Sadie. Onwards and upwards!!

    Claire xx

    • Posted

      While I'm just a beginner at sobriety even I can appreciate not waking up in the morning and being miserable over what I tweeted or messaged the night before!

    • Posted

      It really is a good feeling isn't it? Your post reminded that I used to write a post-it note and stick it on my phone saying 'DO NOT TEXT - YOU WILL REGRET IT'.

      Well done for 3 days sober - it does get easier I promise. The more days you can be alcohol free the more you can congratulate yourself as it really is a major achievement. I've found that I don't want to undo all the good work I've done and I know how much I would hate myself if I gave in.

      So lots of luck and keep going!!

      All the best

      Claire xx

    • Posted

      That's what happened to me too. I started counting the consecutive sober days and when I reached a good number and almost convinced myself that just one drink would be ok, the thought of counting again from zero put me off! As Claire said, KEEP GOING! It does get easier.

    • Posted

      Evening all! Most of you know that i aM 6 years sober but but....one year before i had been sober 3 months approximately and tried just one drink at a birthday party....and said to myself that one drink cannot harm since i am in control...ha ha...tasted nice and strong blue cider later 2litrebottle..ha ha...took me another 6 months to stop but i did. One more does not work unless you are on medication, i.e. The Sinclair Method e.g. Just try and persevere without drinking. For me only total abstinence works. I look and feel you younger😃 Robin

    • Posted

      Hi Robin & John (Toad!!)

      Yes I agree as I'm taking the road of total abstinence, not because my doctor has told me to, but because I just know that I don't trust myself to have one drink.

      As I've said before, for me - one drink would not be enough so best leave well alone and not test myself!!

      Just to say thanks to everyone for the great comments and discussions on here. I'm so glad that I found this site as it makes you realise that you are not alone on this journey.

      All the best.

      Claire xx

    • Posted

      Thanks Humpty Dumpty,

      I do envy you that you can go out and enjoy yourself sober. I did kind of try it once last year & I have to say I didn't enjoy it. The conversation didn't flow as well & I felt anxious going out. I am very social when I am drinking but I just wanted to get through it & go home when I was sober. It was only in a drinking setting I felt like this. If it had of been a lunch date or some other non drinking activity I would of been fine. Funny I know maybe my brain just associates drinking with certain events & that's it.

      I do think your right about saying I am not drinking as we are trying for a baby as it is the truth. Why didn't I think of that ? 😄

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