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Hey yall. I'm new here. My name is Kylie and I'm a 14, almost 15 year old female. This is gonna be quite long so brace yourself. I've been getting really really bad anxiety for the past few months and I feel like the worse the anxiety gets, more symptoms show up. Its like anxiety and worries and stress had taken over 90% of my life. People think I'm the normal happy girl I was a few months ago but that's only because I'm pretty good at masking my feelings and always smile a bright...but fake smile. I started to open up more to my closest friends and then some more friends. They think I'm delusional, which I probably am. They think I'm completely and look absolutely normal, which I really am probably just normal and all fine. The anxiety first started out as being scared of claustrophobic places and always thinking about the worst case scenrios. It's always the what ifs. What if this, what if that. And then I started to develop health anxiety and have had convinced myself I have breast cancer, stomach cancer, heart disease, liver problems, kidney problems, ovarian cancer, brain tumor, and then colon cancer but many people think I have IBS. I heard IBS is common in younger people, females, and those with high anxiety? I also have a few people in my family who has IBS. I don't know anyone or even anyone in my family that has colon cancer, or even any genetic cancers at all, so I'm a bit relieved.
I have all kinds of cognitive symptoms. Like lightheadedness, dizziness, headaches, not remembering much, fatigue, overlying stressed and worried, anxiety in general. And this is really weird but I feel like I think and worry so much about something, I actually start to like..hallucinate or get delusional kinda and starts to feel like or "see" it even though it's probably not even real or there. I get frequent cold hands and feet. I think I've always had that but never really thought much about it until my anxiety started. I bite my nails because of the stress. My mom forced me to stop or she's going to ground me for a whole year! Biting my nails makes my nails more brittle and hurts and bleed sometimes but sometimes my hand comes up to my mouth and my teeth starts to move sometimes without me even realizing.
I also have some bowel issues. I get occasional indigestion. Frequent constipation and diarrhea! Occasional thinner stools than usual but upping my fiber intake helps a lot. My stool have been pretty thin for the past few days but probably because I've been stressing so much that I'm just eating and eating unhealthy food without caring and have not taken my daily fiber supplement or eats lots of fruits and veggies lately. I think I gained a pound! Or maybe I'm just constipated. I get abdominal pain-a lot actually. I wouldn't say anything close to severe to unbearable but it hurts frequently and not just one particular place but has happened everywhere throughout my abdominal. Usually the part above my belly button, upper abdomen I think, and the lower abdomen. The lower abdomen hurts the most frequently, especially the lower left, when I'm constipated. The mid abdomen had some pain too but not as much as upper and lower. The upper pain is usually indigestion, bloating, or constipation. It's a bit weird that I can sometimes feel my poop traveling down my colon because I'm so constipated (the pain slowly started to travel down, to the left). And then diarrhea is that super urgent thing. Had it RIGHT before my choir concert last month, probably because of the anxiety. I also have this yellow substance around my stool! And sometimes my poop smells bad, not overly and worth gagging bad, but a bit more smelly at times? I get so stressed sometimes, I either don't want to eat or I just want stuff my face forever with food. I have never ever seen blood in my poop. Had beets for a 2 days straight and my bathroom trip was not very fun and absolutely terrifying. My blood is generally medium brown in color. Rarely dark but more medium or light, I don't know. Basically, my stool appearances always change. The consistency, the color sometimes (never red or black or clayish or white), the size and shapes definitely, and has food particles in it a lot of the times. I often freak out over some tomato/tomato skin looking thing because it's looks like blood. I haven't had a lot of weight loss. There was a time I was really depressed and stressed that I didn't feel hungry and just wanted to lock myself in my room and cry and think about life, how unfair it can be. I didn't eat a lot that week and dropped about 7 pounds. My mom saw how depressed I was and planned really fun things for us to do and soon, I started to eat and have fun again and then I gained back like 3 or 4 pounds. I'm staying at thisome weight for months, hasn't gone down, but sometimes up but back down again. Read something about random fevers being a sign of cancer. I haven't had a fever since a veryyyyyy long time ago. No vomiting or vomiting blood. Sometimes I feel nausea when I worry to much.
Please help, is this just my brain and anxiety or does it really sound like cancer? I've been getting colon cancer scares but I learned there's something called IBS and apparently, everyone thinks I have it and severe anxiety. My doctor just waved me off, told me to calm down and the problems will slowly start to go away. The problem is, I can't calm down. He recommended therapy but I never really like to sit and talk in person with someone, especially about my worries because I'm trying to push it away instead of remembering it and telling others.
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