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Bipolar episode on social media ruined my relationship

Posted , 3 users are following.

Dizzy88
Dizzy88

I had an episode over Christmas time, where I experienced psychosis and amidst this I fought with my partner and left him. I was experiencing strange thoughts whereby I thought my partner was in some conspiracy against me and that I was being used by him. My delusions were more complex than that but I'll be brief, I felt like I was being threatened and my partner was demonised in my mind. I ended up going on facebook and writing about him being a rapist (completely untrue and all part of my delusions as I felt like I was pulling someone up on a witch hunt). I have a lot of his family as friends on there and they all saw what I'd written and thought I was being malicious. Luckily it was all sorted quickly as I deactivated my account. However, I'm not terrified of seeing his family. Not many people know I am bipolar and I know most would be none the wiser if it wasn't for my out burst on social media. I am still seeing my partner but I am terrified about facing his family again as I don't think they will understand. I would never say a bad word against him and I just wish I knew a way to explain that it's all down to an illness and was not malicious. How do I get over this and move on with my life?

1 like, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • karin65289
    karin65289 Dizzy88

    Posted

    What you described is fairly common for a manic episode. Please don't beat yourself up anymore, you can't undo the delusions or other actions our crazy brains can do. It seems like a lesson learned is to stay away from social media when you swing high - I know it all makes sense at the time but... Take good care of yourself. Perhaps a counsellor can help you wade through the things you said or did that you feel were harmful. Wishing you the best.
    • Dizzy88
      Dizzy88 karin65289

      Posted

      Thank you for your comment, it's nice to know that my experiences aren't uncommon. One of the unfortunate things is the isolation bipolar causes for me as I don't know anyone else personally who has it. I'm definitely avoiding social media, I don't feel like I can face it at the moment & I see it as preventative given what's happened. I'm counting on people being understanding about the whole thing to move forward, but I will try and stop beating myself up about it. Thank you again for your advice, appreciate it x
  • karin65289
    karin65289 Dizzy88

    Posted

    Glad I was able to normalize some of your behaviour - hey who knows better than another BP person? Are you taking medication or opted out of it?  Last year I discovered a bipolar study which hosts 4 - 8 week sessions a year. It's an online course, lead by a very bright and commited facilitator (who is BP as well).  The course has an online live component and is self paced. There are scholarships (I had to use one this time) and registration seems to run for the entire year.  Lots of good people, a private FB page.  If you want more information contact me at [email removed].  You will get things together, it all takes time.

    Emis Moderator comment: I have removed the email address as we do not publish these in the forums. If users wish to exchange contact details please use the Private Message service.

    http://patient.uservoice.com/knowledgebase/articles/398331-private-messages

    • Dizzy88
      Dizzy88 karin65289

      Posted

      Hello, that study sounds interesting. I will send you my email via a private message to avoid it getting taken off!

      Yes, I'm on medication. I had 1 year without any at one point, which felt nice without the numbness that some medications cause. I'd rather be on medication and prevent the possibility though to be honest. I think stress and lack of sleep triggered my last episode to be honest. Do you take medication for yours? I'd definitely like to know more about that study so will message you later. Thanks again for your help and support.

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