bipolars are sane, the world is crazy

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i am 37, gay, kind, considerate, loving, sympathetic, intelligent, egoless etc.

i suffer social anxiety, severe depression, misophonia, high blood pressure etc

In my case I know what causes my bipolar, the mad world wont help and is making me more insane day by day, hour by hour, im hanging on by a thread. im lonely

 

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    Totally agree with us being normal and the world being crazy. I suffer bad social awkwardness, I don't know why but when I talk to people I get all anxious but I'm absolutely fine, I think I just hate people in general I would be happy to live on my own in a massive field with no one around, but that's me. I get so low then get so high and hard to control myself I have to go out and run it's insanity. I call it my evil side within and I just laugh whilst running, it's great I'm like a mad person in a sense but it's a rush and happiness I guess? I'm not so much depressed I call it withdrawn from society I don't agree with what most humans on this earth have to offer us. People say I have a crazy way of thinking but I do believe what I say is true and I just have more knowledge or whatever rolling around in my head. I don't take life seriously and I do find it hard to conform with society and listen to rules. Awaiting diagnoses anyway. Many doctors have told me different. If you wouldn't mind, does it sound like anything to you from what I've said? Thanks 

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