body image issues

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I know I shouldn't have looked but had to when applying cream. So different down there.. Not sure what I expected but guess not what I saw. Cried myself to sleep and thought about telling my hubby he would be better off without me as felt so un wonanly. Ladies have others felt like ne? Did you find your partner didn't notice? Or if they did did it affect your relationship.

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  • Posted

    Aww Tilley, I feel your pain.  The first time I looked a couple of days after surgery I was traumatized.  I was not prepared for the hideous mess.  I felt the same way as you are describing. 

    I did not look again until about week 6 and although there has been some improvement I was still upset and shocked tbh.  I really had not considered it would be so disfigured down there.  I don’t feel that they considered the aesthetics when stitching me back up.

    Matron has said not to look again for at least another 4 weeks or so.  I am avoiding taking a look and hoping for the best.  I am at a loss as to what to do after that point if it is still so disfigured?  

    At 7 weeks post op I don't know the long term impact on our relationship.  That said I have a really supportive husband and we will just have to work through this together somehow.  

    How far along with your recovery are you Tilley?  Look back at previous posts Matron does tell us off for looking down there too soon.  Hopefully things will improve as we heal xxx

     

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  • Posted

    I did the exact same ! Most people do I think that's normal. I felt the same but a week on it looked better and another week on it's better so keep thinking that or like the lady above said don't look until week 12. You can always make an appointment with your doctor and ask her to look xx
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    • Posted

      Thanks sweetie very reassuring. My spec guy did look he is one who told me one of most traumatised perineums he has ever seen & aplogised for making it even tighter and shorter than before. He said he did best he could have done with what he was presented with and that many women have poor quality sex lifes after prilapse surgery just price we have to pay. Not impressed that's why I was looking for answers. Xx
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    • Posted

      I too looked I'm 3 weeks post op. Its just so small. I had to apply lube due to dryness inside and its only and inch deep. I'm so afraid and depressed. I'm getting married Aug 27. I didn't know my vaginal canal would end up so shallow. And the opening would be so small. This is a horrible surgery!
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  • Posted

    Oh Tilley please don't worry, it is early days and I feel sure you husband will be happy that you are strong and getting better. Really, he will. It is frightening I know but your body has been through major surgey and will take many months to recover. Take it steady, you'll have ups and downs, good days and bad days, but you will be stronger for this and it will all be OK.
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    • Posted

      thank you Stephanie for your kind words and support.. sure hope so. Think it all just got to me, exhaustion from going back to work, pain and then spec saying it will always be uncomfortable if not painful..all a bit too much xx
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