Borderline personality disorder HELP

Rebecca please don't give up because all is not lost; and just know that you are not the only one dealing with this. My family believes that I am completely crazy, I lost my job, and thank God I still have a few friends. It is important to take your meds, and try to take them at the same time every day. Also, I have found out that the more I focus on Jesus and His teachings, I am more relaxed and a whole lot less irritated. I know that my mind is messed up, so I practice using His mind. I am praying for you.

Hi Rebecca,

I can only say how sorry I am for the way you feel. Your post struck a cord with me. First off, yes, it's normal, others do have these thoughts (phew sigh of relief). Some people just dont vocalise what they are thinking. That's not to generalise and say that everyone has these thoughts as there are others who can't relate at all.

You must be drained and exhausted living with this kind of hypervigelance. Over thinking over a long period of time not only becomes part of our life, it debilitates us from having a nice one.

Panic - may be underlying fear of being happy due to past events. It can be as simple as selective perception i.e. you feel happy, then something negative happens. If it continues long-term, we begin to associate happy with negative, we then expect the negative and panic that it will be inevitable.

Self blame - is so awful, it is self abuse at its worst. None of us are perfect and we can all be self critical though deep self blame comes from a place of striving for perfection which is totally exhausting.

Can't deal - this is when we protect against hurt, detaching yourself/ self soothing. The 'how dare they' 'they're idiot's' is overcompensating the detachment i.e. reasoning with yourself that your descision not to deal is right.

I have a thought you may know this already.

I so understand, though to others it's viewed as too analytical, too deep even paranoid. What I've found is that no one fully gets who we are, they don't live in our heads and we in turn don't live in theirs. It is frustrating though at one point, a breakthrough happens when someone else gets it. Psychologists that have studied this behaviour and some don't have these types of thoughts/behaviours and yet can help us..now that's something.

I'm unsure if you are having therapy though there is Schema therapy which is specifically designed for these thoughts and the triggers behind them, it deals with the past and the present and delivers real understanding of ourselves and the reasoning behind the pain.

Be easy on yourself and let me know how you are doing.

Hiya, I have also got BPD it is a very difficult diagnosis to live with. It is very normal to have the thoughts and feelings you have. I know that every day is a battle, I tend to use distraction to focus my mind on something else and if I ever feel really bad I go and see my gp who has been really good. I know how hard things can get and even now I have days when my moods are up and down like a yo yo.

Hi, I tend to go for walks with my dog as he gives me a purpose for living, I love watching movies. I play games on my tablet but there are times when I find doing these things really hard. I will sometimes go on a cleaning frenzy. It's a case of finding something to focus your mind on to try to give yourself some breathing space from all the mood swings thoughts and feelings that BPD brings to us on a daily basis. These are just some of my ways of getting through each day and if I feel like a bit of company I would go and see my friend just to have a catch up with her. So for me depending on how I'm feeling depends on which distraction I'll use.