Posted , 4 users are following.
I'm 18 years old, in my final year of high school and to be honest, i have a pretty boring life. I am anti social although i have 2 friends, but they are very social and outgoing so i'm like the silent one in the group. I do sports (rugby) which doesn't make me more social although it's a team sport. Anyhow, i've never really enjoyed life in general and i have nothing to look forward to, as my grades are poor and i'm not sure i'll even go to college.
I've had a decent upbringing, but i'm sure i'm kind of a disappointment to my mom and my uncle (my mother and father got divorced when i was 10 months old) so i don't know my father at all. My mom works in another town so i've been living with my uncle for the past 7 years. I don't really get along with the rest of my family, but i don't care.
Some days i just feel very down and just feel like dying. I'd probably never commit suicide ( i've thought about it many times) because of my Christianity. I don't think i have depression or anything i know of accept from yhe fact that i hate going out and trying to be social. Another thing is i have anger issues from time to time, i lose my temper very easily and can't handle defeat very well. Even the smallest things like playing video games, when i get beaten i lose my temper and have the tendency to swear and hit something and then for the next hour everything irritates me and i get the feeling of destroying everything that bothers me (i've never actually hit a person before and i'm glad about that). Anyhow, life seems to make less sense to me as the days keep coming and i know i'll probably end up a sad and lonely old man one day, thats if i ever get a job lol.
Any advice would be appreciated and thanks for reading!
0 likes, 10 replies