Boyfriend gets angry with my anxiety

Posted , 5 users are following.

I've been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. He was suportive and gentle for the first year with my anxiety and depression. I started getting seperation anxiety about 6 month ago, and would cry and break down every time he left. His friends make fun of me and influence him to avoid me. Now he gets angry when I cry, and start having a panic attack and shut down. Sometimes I will wake him up when hes sleeping by me because I start having anxiety. He tells me I'm immature and tells me to stop. I've told him that when he yells and gets angry, that it hurts me and makes my anxiety worse and I start crying more. I'm working on myself and trying to get better. I no longer cry when he leaves. I do however get anxiety when he doesn't come home after bartendingand stays out past 3am. I don't know what to say to him. I don't know how to get back the gentle, sweet man I once had. I feel like it's all my fault. He said I cause him the most negativity in his life and I'm the only thing that makes him angry. It hurts and I don't have an idea of what to do.

1 like, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • Posted

    It sounds like he just doesn't understand.. It takes a while for a guy to realize it unless they deal with it personally.. If he isn't supportive of you and puts you down, then why be with him?

    He might just think you're being overdramatic or an insecure girlfriend who wants constant attention.. He might not understand that it's seriously a medical issue that you fear being alone. Do you have family to rely on or friends?

    Maybe sit down and explain to him your true feelings and ask how to get it back to normal.. I did that with my fiance when I felt things were going downhill. It was two hours of me crying and explaining all of my feelings, and it helped Alot.

  • Posted

    I wonder if he would have the same non-understanding if he was suffering the same as yourself 
  • Posted

    This relationship isnt going to work out if it continues the way its going. Are you in therapy? Of not you need to be and if you arent on medication you probably need that as well. This disorder and you have a few intertwined makes you behave in ways you never would otherwise. Needy, clingy, selfish and co dependent. Your boyfriend doesnt want that. You inow its okay he doesnt want it, you really do not need him. You need to be with someone who has compassion and is more loving. Some do understand. Some will have the patience. So dont get to upset by it because he sounds like he isnt enjoying the relationship anymore. Not lifetime worthy for you.

    And dont get upset with yourself this is not something you asked for or want yourself. 

    Be careful in your own mind why you are even with him. It might be your illness. Your just scared not to be with him. To call someone immature whilst they are drowning is disgusting. Whether he understands or not he lacks compassion. 

    I hope you find your way and get the help you really need, not for him, for you. You can thank him for making the weeding out process of what you do not want easier.

    if he is compassiinate now and sees you cry and in a bad place he will be the worlds worst spouse for you. No explaining on Earth can force someone to care. Thats the truth.

  • Posted

    My anxiety first hit when my no husband and I were dating. He really didn't understand it. We had just moved into a new place, things were great, and one day I was curled up in a ball on our bedroom floor and I couldn't get up. It was a lot on our relationship until I went to crisis for help and he went with me. He finally seemed to understand. That was 2 years ago. We're now married and I'm having another episode but this time he's understanding. I think maybe you should try and get some help and take your boyfriend with you so he can see that you're really going through something serious and not just being a drama queen as they often think. Hope this helps you and know you're not alone.

  • Posted

    living with anxiety can be a nightmare. There are times when it can seem unbearable and we are left feeling desperate. One thing I know that I forget often is just how hard my anxiety can be for those closest to me.

    I know my partner can find it very difficult at times, especially when I am at my worst.

    Sometimes anxiety blows me out of the water and I can't think straight, other times when I am more calm I try hard to remind myself how hard it is for my partner.

    This being said..my partner is kind and compassionate and only ever tells me enough is enough when what I am doing is detrimental to my health and well being - sometimes I need to be snapped out of it and realise just what is happening: anxiety.

    Your partner sounds as if he is adding to your anxieties. Also, his friends should have little influence over him unless you were doing something that was harmful and abusive toward him.

    When you are having panic attacks his response should not be ridicule...

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