Boyfriend has herpes?

Posted , 4 users are following.

I've been seeing my boyfriend for about 5 months now. I was looking through his things (which I know was wrong) but I came across some medical documents and saw that he has antibodies for herpes simplex. The blood test doesn't specify which type of herpes was found, but either way he's never told me about it and we have unprotected sex. He told me he was clean when I asked a few months ago. Now I'm afraid that I've contracted genital herpes. I'm more angry that he hasn't said anything to me about it and I don't know how to confront him since I'm also in the wrong for looking through his things. Should I get checked even if I'm not showing symptoms? 

0 likes, 13 replies

13 Replies

  • Posted

    Which test was it? IgM or IgG? I'm guessing IgM, if not type-specific, in which case that is not an accurate test for herpes. IgG is the far better test, but even that has its issues in certain cases.

    • Posted

      It said IgG next to the positive result. And then underneath it said that HSV type specific serology is not available with the kind of test he did. Does that mean the test doesn't differentiate between herpes one and herpes two? 

    • Posted

      Correct, the test he had did not distinguish type 1 vs 2.
    • Posted

      If he said he never had a cold sore before is it possible that he carries herpes 1 and doesn't know it? 

    • Posted

      That is unusual for an IgG test to be non-type-specific. It is not recommended by the CDC either. Since his test doesn't identify type, it could just be oral HSV-1, which many people have, often without symptoms. Incidentally, chicken pox should have no bearing on the IgG test for herpes.

    • Posted

      Hey Sam,

      I'm curious did you go to the docs to get checked out..... I'm in the same boat as you and going to get my test taken now I'm freaking out!

  • Posted

    1 out of 6 people has the oral kind of herpes! My dad has it, my grandma has it. But my mom not grandpa ever got a cold sore from them. So he might not think it's a big deal. Since you've been with him for so long - if you're concerned... get a blood test. They can't swab you since you don't have any sores to swab.

    • Posted

      I asked him if he ever had a cold sore before and he said no (but that was without me telling him I saw his results). I also asked if he's ever had chicken pox because apparently that can mess with the results and he said he had them as a kid. I'm just so upset and I can't bring myself to get tested because I'm so scared I'll have it sad 

    • Posted

      You shouldn't be scared because you've never had an outbreak! Just get tested so then you'll have that peace of mind. And just be honest with him and be like "hey I found this paperwork, so I went and got tested myself - I love you (if you do) and I want us to be open and honest with eachother.

    • Posted

      The only type of reaction I may have had is that I had a bunch of UTI's for the first couple months that we started sleeping together. It hurt to pee but I didn't notice any sores or anything like that. It was also very itchy and my doctor said it may have also been a yeast infection. Is herpes usually itchy? But I also do have a few bumps on the outside of my vagina that don't really look like lesions but they're definitely there. They don't hurt when I touch them either. I'm thinking maybe they're genital warts? I guess I really need to see a doctor 

    • Posted

      Yeah see your doctor. Not to scare you but you could have HPV and that carries genital warts.. just get a full blown test so you'll know everything

    • Posted

      Is HPV related to herpes? Could he have given me genital warts or is it unrelated? 
    • Posted

      Research HPV. Literally everyone has it. It's soooooo common. No relation to HSV. But I have both. I only had warts once in ten years I've known about the hpv. Came when I was super stressed and on a very unhealthy diet.

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