Brand new here. Have a question about pain and other symptoms. Please help

Hello everyone,

Just wanted to get feedback on something that has been deeply troubling me for awhile. I know it probably sounds a little strange but I am also very bewildered by it. I will try to make this as condensed as possible.

So starting at around the end of 2019 I started to get burning and constant pain in both testicles that seemed to be associated with my heavy vaping. I was also eating pretty poorly at the time and not exercising. I had multiple ultrasounds done and what continued to show up was a left sided small vericocele as well as as transient hydro and vericocele on the right. The pain continued with both testicles sometimes clenching up towards my pelvis accompanied by, what seemed to be at the time, some swelling.

Unfortunately, as I was only worried about torsion at the time, I continued to vape heavily and eventually switched to smoking heavily. I understand this was completely negligent by me, but it was an extremely stressful time in my life.

Eventually, the pain seemed to subside substantially but the very troubling part is, through constant palpation of the area, I noticed that my testicular veins seemed to have shrunk considerably. I dont think that is the best way to describe it but that is the best description I can come up with at the moment. It is like they are barely holding any blood. Like a complete change in how they feel structurally. My whole scrotum also feels significantly lighter than it used to, like there is barely any weight there. It is an extremely troubling feeling. It feels like they endured so much damage that they have given out. My testicles also feel smaller accompanied by a slight loss in penile size as well. Both my nipples are sore and there also seems to be a slight change in the pitch of my voice.

So I have finally quit smoking as of may 1st. I recently visited a urologist and am awaiting testosterone results. The recent ultrasound that was done only showed a left sided vericocele.

But we all know our own bodies and I'm telling you, something is incredibly off. I feel horrible all the time, extreme brain fog, almost no libido, and the pain still occurs from time to time. My scrotum feels dramatically different from 2 years ago. This is all so extremely unsettling. Feels close to how I would imagine chemical castration.

So I guess my main question is: could it be possible that I have somehow collapsed my testicular veins or at least sustained significant structural damage? I know the ultrasound only showed the vericocele but there has got to be something that has been missed.

Please let me know your thoughts.

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