Can anyone recognise this

In Bipolar people go into true manic episodes, where they can become psychotic (Have you seen the tv show Shameless?). 

In cyclothymia - you have hyperactive episodes, but are still functional. So yes - you could say you have cyclothymia. But dont medicalise this unless its actually causing you a problem. 

My life was very rough and I suffered Depression from an early age, what with bullying and having been ill throughout a large part of infancy I had problems with my education. My family life with parents and siblings was really vicious and I was retired early from my work at thirty eight years ol with a list of chronic medical and mental health problems.

I was lucky and had a fantastic Surgery that took me and help get me a great deal of mental and physical tests and treatment. Even now I still need help as a pensioner, although the basic problems where sorted in some ways.

You need help to get over the negativity that was your early life as it seems that has been with you for a long time. This is still effecting life with partner and children

Talk to your GP and explain how you are feeling, some treatment and support so you can put your past fears to sleep and get on with your life

BOB

i can kind of relate to what you are saying as I had similar episodes when I was young. I am now aged 50 and was diagnosed as bipolar 2 about 2 1/2 years ago.

i had a wonderful upbringing with wonderful parents and a very loving family, but I had a few incidents in my youth that seem to have lasting effects e.g. sexually assaulted, beaten up and mugged, more sexual assault, bullying etc etc etc.

imalso have either ve

i had depressive episodes when I was about aged 7 ( before any outside events), when I was about 12, 18, 24, 32, 41 and it’s got progressively worse. 

In between these episodes of depression, that I didn’t actually recognise until I was in my 40’s I had either periods of stability or what I would now think of as hypomania.

the only times I have been psychotic are during periods of alcohol abuse, but that’s a different story for now. During hypomania episodes I would either, and still do, shop excessively or exercise excessively. I can buy a pair of shoes in 6 different colours and never wear any of them! Or run 5 miles a day for 60 days straight and then do nothing for weeks. I also have either very high esteem or very low and paranoid moods.

up until 18 months ago, I was on antidepressants and although they helped they were never quite right. But when I was finally diagnosed as bipolar, a diagnosis I still strugggle to accept, I was prescribed an antipsychotic medication as well.

for 18 months I was finally stable, but then I got complacent and came off all my meds’. That was a disaster and after 6 months of horrendous withdrawal I crashed and am now back on them.

anyway, cyclomania, as far as I am aware Is where moods swing within hours or minutes rather than months. I saw a documentary about it once and that was truly scary.

speak to your psychiatrist again. You sound a bit like me, as in moods change over longer periods than hours?

thats just my opinion though on what you’ve said and from my interpretation. So please seek help and advice from a medical professional. 

Its taken me years to get the right meds and the right diagnosis, and more importantly to accept that diagnosis. So please stick with it and don’t be scared to accept help. It’s so much better in the long run.

stay safe

liz