Cancer fear

Posted , 4 users are following.

My boyfriend had a growth removed from his testicle over two weeks ago and is STILL waiting on results, despite the fact that we were told 5-10 days.

A nurse rang him on Friday saying that they were still discussing his case and that he was to come in for tumor markings during the week. 

They're being very criptic. I'm beyond destressed at this point. It's the waiting and the not knowing that is killing me. Just tell us something. 

People are saying it's just standard and normal, but surely if there was nothing wrong they'd have nothing to discuss and he wouldn't need tumour markings. 

Help please. 

Has anyone any advice at all??

1 like, 9 replies

9 Replies

  • Posted

    Dear Becca, 

    That is such a difficult place to be. Quite the most painful. It is only some three months since I was there myself. I had worked out for myself that what the urologist had said implied prostate cancer T3. It was others in the forum who helped me along. Not with deceiving words but with hard realism for they had been where I was and you are now. I was waiting for the urologist to tell the diagnosis in the light of my biopsy.  Yes, fearing bad news and hoping it would be better. It has to be lived through, no one can do it for you. Each day worse than the last, my frantic messages answered by steady grim replies. The day did come. It was such a relief to know that I did have T3 PCa and what we were going to do about it. I have had my moments since then but none as bad as waiting for that first diagnosis. I and many others will feel deeply for you. We know the pain you suffer. We hope that knowing we stand with you will help you through. For those of us who pray, be sure you are in our prayers. Prayers to boost your courage and fortitude. Prayers that you may be aware of our fellowship. Prayers that you may find rest in sleep this night.

  • Posted

    Thanks for that. 

    I'm living in a sense of hope that it's all protocal and all just standard but I'm convinced. 

    I presume that he wouldn't be disccusing his results and getting a tumor marking test for no reason right? There must be something wrong right? 

    • Posted

      Dear Becca,

      I think I am reading the situation the same way as you are. It is usual that the definitive diagnosis comes from the biopsi. Scans and markers are used to assess the stage the disease has reached. 

      In my case which concern my prostate the urologist never used the word cancer at the first meeting yet  still lacking the biopsi he managed by inference to describe my desease with remarcable clarity and accuracy. Thus I had over more than a week (the total elapsed time between meetings was four weeks ) worked through my shock and horrors with the help of my friends in the formum before I was back with the urologist to hear his official diagnosis and recommendations for treatment.

      I see you last wrote about two hours ago when I was sleeping. I hope you are now sleeping and that will remain the case until morning. Refreshed, you will more easily see that life does go on. You are, however, locked into this stage of knowing but not knowing until you have the diagnosis and the agreed treatment plan. 

      I whish you a good outcome for you both, within the bounds of realistic common sense.

  • Posted

    Hello Becca,

    I am am sorry to hear the news about your Boyfriend and the subsequent anxiety you are both experiencing which is perfectly understandable.  But,  it may not be as bad as you fear.

    In the unhappy event that your Boyfriend's tumour is malignant,  George has broadly covered the philosophy of an almost universal coping strategy,  at which he has become quite adept.  We all start off fearful and/ or resentful to one degree or another,  but then respectively we live through our symptoms one day at a time and discover that,   the human condition is marvellous at compensating us in times of adversity;  especially if spiritually,  we trust in a Higher Power.

    But,   at this point and unless I've missed something,  no-one has said that your Boyfriend's tumor is malignant have they?   That,  is the key word.  

    If it is benign...and given the laid back approach the Hospital Staff appear to have it seems it might be...then the ongoing procedure is because they are employing standard protocol to ascertain bench marks as to both location and size, against which any future developments ( if indeed there are any ),  can be measured.

    In the meantime,  try to not worry and remain,  optimistic.  I recommend  Becca,  that you both place the whole matter in God's hands and trust in Him.  ( This advice may well bring a hail of criticism down upon me in other Posts,  but you know,  I couldn't care less).  My God looks after me and He has promised,   that by both believing in and trusting in Him,  He will look after both of you too.

    With kind regards

    Dudley

     

  • Posted

    Thanks for the help guys. He's going in tomorrow for tests so fingers crossed it mightn't be as bad as I'm pressuming. At least we'll get some kind of information. 

    Thanks again. 

    • Posted

      Hang in there Becca... I have a feeling that it is all going to turn out O. K.  

      Have Faith.   

       

    • Posted

      Remember to ask when and how you will learn the results of the tests. Informed expectation can reduce the amount a pain that wating inevitably causes. Although an immediate answer would be best. I certainly wish that for you but my wishes are not too powerful, sadly.
  • Posted

    I am so sorry to hear that, I want to help you so much, but I have no idea. If only I was a doctor, I will try my best to help you. I hear eat apricot kernel can help, maybe you can try it. Hope he become better soon.
  • Posted

    Hello Becca,

    I do hope that ' no news ' is Good News ?  

    If not,  then don't worry about telling us about it until you feel you can;  or even at all,   if to do so would stress you.

    The community is here to support you if you need it.  You are not alone.

    Kind Regards

    Dudley

     

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