Cannabis advice.
Posted , 3 users are following.
Hi.
So my son is now 21 and has been smoking skunk weed for a couple of years. He has always been very flippant about it now matter how many times I have expressed my worry about it. He smokes it heavily. At one point his room stank of it. When I went in a tin was in his room with a couple of bags of weed inside, plus lot's of empty bags and some scales. That and the fact that he's constantly going in and out made me suspect that he was dealing. His excuse, that he uses the scales to make sure that he's not being undercut. He has as an apprenticeship and goes away for a week every few months to college. He was caught with the same tin of cannabis and scales in his room and is now suspended from work pending an investigation for drug use and suspected dealing.
I'm at my wits end with him. I have tried everything to help him to realise that this is controlling and ruining his life. I don't know what else to do! I have 2 little ones and I work from home and his behaviour is impacting on all of us. If he ends up being charged it means I also loose my job because i have safeguarding responsibilities. Help!
0 likes, 1 reply
brian_95595 Loubs56
Posted
Hi loubs
like lots of families coping with this you have 2 options. 1 you can throw him out and have nothing to do with him and hope that the thoughts of losing his family will have an impact. Like a lot of addicts this probably won't work hence all the homeless addicts wandering the streets. If you threaten to do this you might have to follow it up with action.
2 your son is young just like ours who is almost 19. Your house your rules and you can say NO DRUGS allowed and you have to clean his room and stick to your guns. If he wrecks his room don't fix anything and if he loses friends keep reminding him that he is creating all this himself and likewise if he loses his job also it's his doing and ask him if that's what he wants. No job no friends and things always get worse. You can be sure if he has the scales in his room he's selling it. How it works is he gets some weed some to use and some to sell. He pays for some and a few weeks to pay for the rest.
if he doesn't pay up on time you might get a knock on the door from heavies. Unfortunately you are stuck in this dilemma by your son and he won't get you out of it so how strong are you. You should give him or do nothing that helps him in any way and let him fall from grace as quickly as possible.
Is he lying cheating and blaming you on everything and does he keep on saying he doesn't have a problem and the only problems are the ones you are creating. If so get rid of any guilt you are feeling.
lock up your purse if he has no money. If things get worse and he can't get stuff you might have to hide all the keys of the house and lock your bedroom door at night time. Take his shoes off him at night. If he's violent get a protection order from the courts then one phone call to the police and he will be lifted. I could go on and on about this as we lived it with our son who is now in rehab for 3months now and almost 5 since he took stuff. We where never afraid to either ring or threaten to ring the police but don't be afraid and don't feel guilty about anything you say or do as he is dragging you down and you have to swim.its not your son when he's on drugs. I can only wish you all the best as you deal with it. Everything I've mentioned here is how things were with us and it's only advice as you have to find your own way of dealing with him. Good luck.