carers

I am sorry for what you are feeling at the moment. The demands of care giving can be overwhelming, especially if you feel you have little control over the situation or you’re in over your head. As a caregiver, you first need to take well care of yourself; only when we first help ourselves, we can effectively help others. Caring for yourself is one of the most important—and one of the most often forgotten—things you can do as a caregiver. When your needs are taken care of, the person you care for will benefit, too.

Unfortunately, you are suffering from arthritis, which could be too exhaustive for yourself. Stress and this feeling of “not doing enough” can make this condition worse, leaving you in more suffering. It is very important to being heard, long phone chats with other caregivers, online forums and support groups can be life changing. If not that, Stress reducers can be simple activities like walking and other forms of exercise, gardening, meditation or having coffee with a friend. I am sure you are under care of orthopaedician for your arthritis. Remember, your own health is vital to yourself and your loved ones.

Hi Amanda, many caregivers don't know how to marshal the goodwill of others and are reluctant to ask for help. You may not wish to "burden" others or admit that you can't handle everything yourself. However, if you really think, you can’t handle it alone all the time, be prepared with a mental list of ways that others could help you.  

I am sure you must be doing a good job of care-giving to your ill husband. But if you feel at any time, you are not able to cope up due to your own illnesses, don’t consider this as your failure. The time comes for many, if not most, caregivers where they need to look at options such as assisted living or a nursing home for their loved one. The caregiver may be at a breaking point and needs relief for his or her own health, or the care receiver may not be safe without more care. Enlisting the help of assisted living or a nursing home does not mean you failed care giving class. You are just getting help. You remain part of a team.