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Citalopram round 2 - struggling with side effects

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Dxn
Dxn

Hi, citalopram patients!

I made a mistake over Christmas - after about nine years on 30mg citalopram + 150mg bupropion, I experimented (with therapist's approval) with cutting citalopram out. It felt amazing for a while - most of all I had my repressed libido back - but eventually I noticed myself crying more at unusual things, or getting visibly angry when I wouldn't have before. In January something made me despair about aging and death (I'm 38!) and I couldn't let go of it, around the same time I survived a shakeup and layoff at work - my therapist and I decided to put me back on 20mg citalopram again for now.

I thought I wouldn't have trouble going back on after just 2 months off, but the side effects have been much more brutal this time around. I immediately lost my libido again, along with my appetite, I feel twitchy and unsettled and yet at the same time it's hard to imagine enjoying anything but lying back with my eyes closed. I'm worried that my lack of eating is making me worse, but it's hard to stomach the thought of food - I'm managing about 1000 calories a day between fat free yoghurt, cereal, bananas and baby carrots.

My therapist has stressed the importance of exercise, and I've got myself to get up and go for walks each day even though just lying down and hiding is so tempting - despite the cold and the effort to get there, being outside does seem to help. (My work-from-home job and lifestyle are very sedentary otherwise.) I'll take at least one nap for an hour a day, and my mood seems to improve as the day goes on.

My therapist has been on holiday but I'll see her again next week - it's been 3 weeks since I restarted. In the meantime, I wanted to see if anyone else had had second-round side effects and how to power through them!

0 likes, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • Dxn
    Dxn

    Posted

    I checked my notes from therapy appointments (which I'm glad I kept!) and I noticed I lost my appetite a couple of days before restarting citalopram! So now I'm second guessing myself and thinking that 20mg is too low a dose, not too high - and that it hasn't been able to counteract the natural apathy and appetite loss caused by my anxiety yet.

  • SubEkAll
    SubEkAll Dxn

    Posted

    Hi.

    I am on my second. First time was nov 2021 to sep 2022.

    I got off way too early and am back in the hole again.

    I started 10mg for four weeks. Coming up on 3 weeks at 15mg.

    Side effects are tough just like they were the first time. Morning anxiety. I take the meds around 9am and then get a wave of anxiety depression about three hours later.

    I take one 0.5 lorazepam daily when that wave comes and then the rest of the day is pretty good. By bedtime i can't believe i won't be fine in the morning.

    Last time it took me two full months to feel considerably better. Then a steady climb until August when i felt like myself fully.

    When i started at 10mg i was sobbing on the couch the next day. None of that before. Same thing happened when i went to 15mg. I am going to let this settle for at least six weeks to see if it is enough for me.

    Went straight to 20mg the first time and it was absolute hell for more than a month.

    • Dxn
      Dxn SubEkAll

      Posted

      Agh, I'm sorry it was rough but thank you for sharing your experience! I have that same feeling in the evenings - perfectly normal, there's nothing to be anxious about, and yet by morning it feels like I'm about to walk into the worst exam ever!

      I'm feeling a lot better this week - when I felt my lowest, my wife and daughter were visiting grandparents so I had no routine to my day. Now that school has started again it gives me a purpose. I went up to 30mg where I was before, and have been on that for a week - at the same time I started taking a 100mg magnesium supplement because i had vaguely heard that it could help citalopram along, and I'm definitely feeling a lot better this morning. It could be a complete placebo effect, but some combination of those has improved things for now.

    • SubEkAll
      SubEkAll Dxn

      Posted

      I am glad you have turned for the better. I hope it keeps improving.

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