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So about three weeks ago I went in for a colonoscopy. I am always nervous before these kinds of tests. I am scared of the damage that will be done removing Polups and taking multiple biopsy samples. In the changing room I noticed that I was so scared that I could hardly reason with myself to take off my clothes, knowing full well what I would be putting myself through. I felt like I was not protecting my body from harm and I was sick about it. I went through with it, but after I was upset and I noticed that the pad they put under you was covered with blood. I have had several of these and I have never seen that much blood before. Years ago I was sexually abused by a male doctor and it is the only reason I can come up with as to why I have these jitters. This time was the worst experience of my life. It has been over three weeks now and I am still in pain with some bleeding. I feel like I was hacked up and I am upset with myself for allowing this to happen. Everyone I have talked to said that it was for the best and they removed three large growths that were not cancerous, but the bleeding is scary and no matter what they say I will not go in for another one any time soon. Unfortunately, I seem to have some side effects from this one and I am scared they will want to do another one to figure out why I am still bleeding, as the nurse I talked to was suprised that I was bleeding still. I am really getting scared. I have pain in each location, where the polyps were removed and the worst pain in the decending colon. That is where the largest polyp was removed. It was 10mm in size. The other two were 8mm and 9mm. Plus because I suffer from inflammatory bowel disease they had to take hundreds of biopsy samples. I did tell my doctor that I didn't want any biopsies taken, but she did anyway. Now I am still bleeding and I never want to have another one of these. This bad experience may cost me my life in the future as I could develope colon cancer, but we will never know because I am done having these. I will NOT Allow them to damage me like this again. I really need to know how I can cope with this so I can have one again without feeling like I let myself down. Anyone else have a similar experience or am I alone in this? I just feel like I allowed them to harm me and I am really upset about the whole thing. Even worse I now have trouble urinating and one of my doctors wants me to have a PSA test. If that is high then they said they will want to do a biopsy on that as well. That I hear is done through the rectum and after what I just went through I think I will pass on it. I am just fed up with all the tests and I wish that I was healthy so I didn't have to bother going through this any longer.
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