Coming off citalopram. :(

So glad I have found this sight. I feel I can be honest about my feelings without judgment. I have decided that I also want to go off of citalopram, but I am so nervous about falling back into my depression. Life events have changed for the better though, and I feel I can handle what is thrown at me without these pharmaceutical crutches! I am worried once I go off of them, A placebo effect will take over, and I will feel awful because I THINK it is because I am off the pills. I don't have an apt with my doctor until March 13th, so I don't know if I should stop taking them now, or wait until I see her? I am on Citalopram 20mg. I would appreciate any thoughts on how to begin.

Only YOU will know when the time is right.

I've cut back before and crashed but that was because life problems got in the way of success. I was so fed up with the weight gain which I knew just had to be because of SSRI's over the years.

Last time I went to the doc., I was feeling ok so she suggested I try to come off them and I did. All I cant suggest is to take it VERY slowly and don't do what my doc. told me to do and come off within 2 weeks. TWO weeks after 13 years +????? I would say do it over 4/6 weeks at least.

I, now, think that the pills made me worse, at times. I'm normally a strong person, albeit a very emotional one and I'm determined never to touch them again. Do I think they helped me? NO, is my answer.

Hi Dianne,

I would say wait until you see doc and definitely dont rush to come off them. I tried 5 times before and failed (coming off over a series of weeks rather than months).

The pills definitely helped me through a very difficult 7 or 8 years but now I feel ready to come off. I dont know where I would have been without them actually (I dread to think). Had 2 nervous breakdowns then tried to cure myself and decided to try Citalopram after 3 years of awful anxiety and self help books which did not help at all as I just couldnt unravel my totally screwed up thought processes.

Bday, maybe I'm being very unkind to all the different pills I was on over 13+ years but I think if they had given me placebos I would have survived. I was desperate and would have taken anything the doc. prescribed to make me well.

I HAVE survived but trod many rocky roads to reach this destination. It's not perfect but a lot better than theHell I've lived in, at times. I, went back, and visited for a couple of days, recently but decided I didn't like it there so didn't stay. One day, I hope I will reach that perfect place (in my head) and feel contentment, at long last. I hope I meet you all there.

Hi all

Julie that's very interesting about the fillers!.

Just an update. I've been reducing for months and the last three months I have been on a steady daily dose of 2.5 mg. This length of time was recommended by my pharmacist. Any way finally stopped completely yesterday. Today I'm scratchy behind the eyes and a bit irritable but otherwise got quite a bit done at home, had an afternoon siesta and took the dog for a walk too. So all good.

My pharmacist said not to skip days but stay on this low dose for longer ie months not weeks and then stop completely. I did this following a number of months of gradually coming down from 20mg.

I have been gradually decreasing dropping a dose by alternating high and low doses eg 20,15, 20 for a few weeks and then a steady 15 mg etc. I avoided all the problems of withdrawal syndrome or whatever it's called. I only had some fatigue after I dropped doses every two weeks but this was too quick so slowed rjght down.

Good luck all

Hi Marbel

I was constantly at the gp's telling her i didn't feel well, i didn't have any specific symptoms as such, so i had a load of blood tests done and everything was normal, so she decided to tell me to up the citalopram to 30mg a day he thinking that i was depressed and not coping.

I thought yeah i must be depressed so i agreed to up the tablets, so went to the chemist to get them, i was joking with the pharmacist about all the different coloured boxes they came in as i had another brand and thats when he explained about the different companies who made them and that they only got what was in the wholesalers at the time of ordering them. He then stated to explain about the fillers and the coatings of the tablets and it was him who said that maybe some didn't agree with me, he looked back on his computer and found out that i had 8 different brands over the last 12 months, and the new brands coincided when i was feeling ill.

He suggested that he would try and get me the same brand each month, but, couldn't guarantee it, but he had 3 boxes of the bristol brand and would keep them for me. I went to see the gp and told her and stated that i wanted to stay on the 20's and she agreed for 3 months to see how i was, and hey presto i felt like a new woman after a couple of days lol.

So thats where i am today, splitting the 20's in half as pharmacist cant get hold of 10mg in the bristol brand lol.

I googled about having different brands of medication and there are a lot of studies about generic vs original tablets on the internet especially regarding anti depressants.

wow think i better stop waffling on now lol, am doing ok so far but then it is only day 3 lol

Juliex

My doctor was totally wrong, in telling me to stop within two weeks - totally wrong and I wish I'd spoken to my pharmacist too.

HI Marbel,

Congrats on getting down to zero! Hope you continue to feel good.

best wishes x

So today is day two with no Cit. I, like Marbel have been reducing over months, as the first attempt cold turkey back in 2012 was a complete train wreck. Yesterday, I was able for the first time in maybe a decade - take a 5 hour nap and get that deep sleep - unbelievable how good it felt to awake from a deep sleep. I am hopeful that many of the side effects have already happened ( mouth sores, anxiety, and itching ). My mouth sores are totally gone and I just try to talk myself through the anxiety ( I was originally placed on Cit for PMS ). However, the itching is still bothersome and given that I am newly in menopause IDK if that is a trigger also or not. It is a brutally cold Winter here in the States and super dry inside, so I am sure that is a contributing factor ( even though I have a humidifier running @ night). Like all of us, I so want to be done with this drug after 12 plus years. I followed Gillian and Marbel's

very slow reduction plan this time and stopped @ 2.5 mgs ( last tiny pill on 2/28/14) after staying at that dosage since 12/19/13 .

I am rooting for all of us!

Group hug - Michelle

Julie -

I think you have something there in regard to the manufacturers. I noticed a difference several years back when I picked up a new dose of Cit and it was made by , I think "reddy" or at least that was what was stamped on the pill.

I asked to go back to whatever it was before the "reddy" company and the pharmacist said my insurance would not pay for the other original brand. So, if it costs less is it less in quality? IDK, but I know I felt a huge difference and that was back in 2006, should have been my first clue to try and get off the cit.

Hindsight now...

Michelle.

Stick with it, Michelle. I'm feeling a lot better, today but I do realise that I will always have periods of depression. Need to look for alternatives to medication. I have been taking a little 5HTP though.

The constant rain, in the UK, is so miserable - I don't feel like going anywhere. We are not even guaranteed a good summer!

hi ms mac

I am in the uk as well and we have had a lot of rain recently!!!!

i try to find the positives in the rain, and have even started to take the dog for a walk, well drag him for a walk as he doesn't like the rain lol

I find that sitting in the park (even in light rain) helps me put my problems into perspective, I hold onto the fact that life is to short and that we should grab it by both hands as we dont know whats round the corner.

I lost my daughter when she was 9yrs old to bone cancer, and although i have learnt to live with this now and it was hard going, i want to try to live without using the pills as a crutch, i want to feel emotions again, i would just like to be me for a change.

I keep telling myself that if i can deal with my daughters illness and her death, then nothing can be as bad as that, so yes i can do this and get of citalopram and start living.

I admire everyone going through this hell at the moment, and hope we can support each other through it

Juliex

Oh, Julie!!! That brought tears to my eyes - no wonder you needed Cit. I don't want to say too much and make you cry.

Here I am, sitting with nothing much to bother me now and there are so many worse off with not even a roofover their heads - people who have to sleep rough in the rain and cold and I'm moaning about looking out at it from the warmth and comfort of my own house.

You know your daughter would want to see her mum happy so live for her. Do you have a husband to support you? Nothing better than a cuddle when you are down but, unfortunately, I can't have that.

Like you, the pills were a needed crutch but 13 yrs. on I have had enough of them and want to get my life back too instead of sitting breaking my heart.

Yes, we will be here for each other.

Take care ((hugs))

S

Hi ms mac

I couldn't cry even if i wanted to lol, thats wat i mean about no emotions i sooooooo want to cry i know that sounds silly, but i want to feel again.

yes i do have a fantastic husband whom i met 5yrs ago, been married 4yrs this year, its not my children's father, we split not long after my daughter died, cancer no only destroys the person it destroys families as well, her father and I grew apart. The way i see it is that i was lucky as i had Jessica my daughter for 9 wonderful years, some people dont get that, it would have been worse if she had died in an accident, at least i had time to prepair and it wasn't all doom and gloom we did have some fun along the way!!!

But now i have the best husband in the world, he didn't have any children of his own so has taken on mine, mind you there not children anymore, but there both still pains lol

I am so glad i've found this forum, knowing am not alone and that am not going mad only going mad with withdrawal symptoms lol, although i can talk to my husband and hes really supportive there is nothing like speaking to those who are going through it with you, and they maybe further on in the withdrawal process and can offer help maybe to ease other thats what i want

Apart from a bit of a fuzzy head am doing ok, but its very early days, even though i want off them, am a bit scared to incase i cant cope without them, but hey i can only try.

Juliex

I hear that happening a lot. Just think that your daughter sent someone special to you. I thought my mother would have done the same but it didn't happen. She would hate to see me like this.

I was fine today and, thankfully, that muzzy head has gone, but something's happened to make me 'nervous' - nothing major - just something I have to deal with, alone, again.

I would just like something to calm me but my doctor does not believe in Valium etc. even for an emergency.

I've been frightened to come off the pills permanently and told the doc. I thought I would be on them for life. Now that I'm off them, I don't feel any worse. I cried rivers on them and will do the same without them as that is just me.

S