Concerned about severe emotional distress

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Hello! I'm 39 and have been in peri for about 3 years now (it runs early in my family.) I didn't even realize what was happening until last year; I thought the awful anxiety and depression and crying and such were from some past issues I was facing and dealing with. I've been using progesterone cream and tried adding a prescription estradiol, but the estradiol seemed to quickly and greatly increase my anxiety and depression. 5HTP was helping, but isn't helping now. I'm considering trying an antidepressant. What really has me concerned are these awful times when the emotions seem to all collide and become so unbelieveably intense that there's not even a name for them anymore (other than "severe emotional distress"wink and it just desperately hurts and I can barely bear it and have no idea what to do to cope other than breathe deeply and maybe even rock back and forth a bit. It makes me wonder if I'm losing my mind. Does anybody else experience this and know what I mean? Is this just what it feels like when the hormones are doing something really strange, maybe? Is this just another part of the awful "normal" of perimenopause?

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12 Replies

  • Posted

    Lora it's completely normal. Sometimes our nerves are too out if control to just 'suck it up' and go on with our day. You do what you have to so you can feel better. If its deep breathing while you're rocking back and forth, so be it. 😌

    I don't take hormones (not to say I won't) but I did start on a couple of meds and extra Magnesium.

    Hope you feel better! Hugs!!!!😊😊😊

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  • Posted

    Hi Lora, so sorry to hear what you're experiencing and at such a young age. It's quite possible that if perimenopause is coinciding with you dealing with some past issues, that all your emotional distress is exacerbated. I had something very similar and I recognise getting to the point where all I could do was just breathe. It wasn't till I looked back at it all that I realised I had been dealing with 2 pretty awful situations with perimenopause dumped on top. I resorted to antidepressants just to be able to function in a normal person's world!! Am still struggling with menopausal mood swings, anxiety and depression but it's not as bad and am no longer on the ADs. I personally find yoga, Qi Gong, pilates etc and singing in a group also help my emotional wellbeing enormously. Hang in there and keep trying stuff until you find what helps. Stay in touch, Jane xxxx

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  • Posted

    Sorry to hear you're going through this so early.😕

    I had my last period November of 2010. I was blessed and was doing fine until 2014 and then I just thought I was losing mind! Dark thoughts and dark moods, not feeling like myself at all. I'm on the antidepressant Trazodone and I have Valium for the occasional panic attack. But occasionally I still have some type of hormone surge, where I feel nuts again(last week). I exercise, drink plenty of water, and I pray. Most days I'm fine. Be kind to yourself. Menopause is not for the faint of heart, which is why women go through it, not men!😂😂

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  • Posted

    Hi Lora..unfortunately it is normal to feel this way. The mood problems with depression, irritability, nervous anxiety, obsessive thinking and even anger were by far the worst part of Peri for me. It would feel as though all these feelings would happen at once and I felt so overwhelmed I couldn't function at all sometimes. I completely understand trying to deal with personal issues during menopause as it also happened to me and trying to sort out incredibly difficult personal stuff when you are in this state of mind is near impossible. I found a very good councelor who helped me put things into perspective but it obviously didn't fix my problem. I felt so bad on a few occasions I thought I was really losing my mind and it scared me. The last straw for me was going to buy kitty litter then sitting in the car and crying my heart out for no real reason. The constant crying was hell. I started BHRT not long after that and I understand now that my body reacts extremely badly to rises in estrogen and it literally makes me crazy. I've been on my bios for about 16 weeks and had them adjusted once already. Also started taking DIM again which definitely helps me and I feel quite normal again. I still have some ups and downs but they're very manageable now. Hope this helps and you are normal.

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    • Posted

      I feel your pain.  This is a horrible, scary time.  Prevous issues (anxiety and ocd) are magnified 100%.  Now depressed about the entire situation.  Went from Paxil to Zoloft....which was totally ineffective.  Now doc is putting me back on Paxil....at a higher dose.  Praying it will kick in.  Until then, there is ativan.  Seeing a counselor, but it is hard to overcome my thoughts.  Have to retrain the brain, which is apparently the gold standard.  Wish it would work.......
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    • Posted

      I always suffered from PMS and I've had depression and obsessive thinking on and off all my life. I used Zoloft a number of years ago which seemed to help slow my brain down a little and help with the obsessive thinking and iv had therapy at different times but it wasn't until I started getting my hormones balanced correctly that these problems started to go away. The doctor who is doing my hormones is amazing, he could tell just from looking at me what kind of person I am, how I think, my exact personality and which hormone drives me which is progesterone and that my body hates estrogen. He said our hormones shape who we are and it hit me then that all my issues through my life have been due to hormones. It was an absolutely amazing feeling to have someone finally understand me. I know I'm going on a bit but just don't underestimate how powerful your hormones can be.

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    • Posted

      Wish I could take hormones, however my doctor (and mom) refuse to comply, due to cancer risks. I have a feeling that hormone balance plays a huge roll in our issues
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    • Posted

      I'm shocked at the difference in myself since I've been on bios. Not just my Peri symptoms but the way I've worried and over thinking everything constantly and I'm so much my relaxed now. Don't get me wrong, I still think about stuff but I get over things now and I can shrug things off where as they would usually eat me up. I'm not a different person but I can live with myself. My boyfriend told me yesterday that he likes coming home now. Must say I completely understand him.

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  • Posted

    Ditto to all of this.  Thank goodness I am not alone.  Feel like I am losing it : (
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  • Posted

    I can relate Lora. I have experienced quite a lot of trauma in my life and with my hormones fluctuating so much it seems to have resurfaced all my emotions related to my past traumas. I was so scared and felt like I was drowning. I think if there are any unresolved emotions they come to the surface during (peri) menopause. It's like one giant dose of PMT all at once. Deep breathing, affirmations and any grounding activity can help ( if only slightly) during such intense emotional waves. I hope this helps a bit as I know how you are feeling.

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    • Posted

      Completely agree with you. Had personal issues to deal with through Peri and I couldn't deal with anything at all. My emotions were out of control and the brain fog was insane and it wouldn't let me sort through any problems that I had. Peri makes everything 100 times worse. Ended up finding a good counselor just so I could offload and he did help me put things into perspective.

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    • Posted

      Oh God yes. Its like some type of ptsd. I think about events I havent thought about for years! Our brain can certainly mess with us at times. I do meditate and tell myself out loud that its ok. Dont even care what the person in the next car thinks of a crazy lady talking to herself! Lol.
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