1. Community
  2. Mental health
  3. Alcohol Consumption

Confused

Posted , 6 users are following.

Paper_fairy
Paper_fairy

so been on an amazing spiritual weekend..got back and ex has ruined it all by sending negative, horrible messages. Beginning to think he's the devil. He continues to destroy any serenity I begin to build. He's gone to live in Italy now and blames me for destroying him( he is 22 years sober). I start to get well and then he just continues to cause me so much pain. But it's my fault always...

Ive had enough...

1 like, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • ADEfree
    ADEfree Paper_fairy

    Posted

    Sounds like the guy has unresolved mental issues. Is there any reason you have to deal with him at all? 
  • h1954
    h1954 Paper_fairy

    Posted

    I am pleased that you had such a good weekend, and really feel for you that your ex seems to have ruined it. But he's you ex. Do you have to have any contact with him?

    He's your ex and has no power over you. You are on your journey no one else's. Hope you can gain strength from the weekend and know that you don't deserve his venom, you are worth so much more than that.

  • rishi65662
    rishi65662 Paper_fairy

    Posted

    Dear

    Can understand ur agony. Try to face the situation with positivity and strength. Relax ur mind with some form of meditation or try diversion of mind by involving with some activity which can capture ur full attention. Try to achieve sobriety with sincere effortd. Be optimistic. You will soon feel comfortable and happy. All the best.

    A fatherly figure...Rishi from India.

  • Paper_fairy
    Paper_fairy

    Posted

    Thank you for your replies my dear friends. Will take your comments and advice on board so gratitude. I do have to still stay in contact because he still has quite a lot of my things plus he owes me some money. But I don't need these things straight away so will concentrate on getting strong again. Will keep you posted x
    • ADEfree
      ADEfree Paper_fairy

      Posted

      Understood, Paper. 

      Not that I think you should view him as evil or any such thing, but realize that he is likely pretty adept at pushing your "buttons", so whatever you can do to stay serene in such situations will be to your advantage. This may be his canned response to stress, maybe if you can find a different way to approach such situations that won't trigger that, for it sounds like he's being kind of a machine about it. Well, if you have a talk doc, run it by them, if no, maybe someone here will have been in a similar situation and will come up with some good tools for dealing with it.

      Glad to hear your weekend was such a success!

    • Paper_fairy
      Paper_fairy ADEfree

      Posted

      Thank you ADE. I am in pain and thank you for being there and giving me hope. I realise though that this forum is for alcohol and not for mending a broken heart! I have got well before and will again. Just have to try and be positive. Alcohol does take the pain away for an hour or two but then the pain comes back so much worse the next day. I will survive and be there to help others when I'm strong again. 😢😀
    • ADEfree
      ADEfree Paper_fairy

      Posted

      You help just posting and telling us how it is for you, Paper! Somebody else will read about your struggles and take heart. Keep going Paper, you're winning! 

      It's too bad that your ex feels like he has to bully you and not take responsibility for his own problems. Not only does it upset you for no good reason, he threatens his own sobriety by doing so.

      Hold your head high, Paper!

Back to top

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the community to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the community are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the community is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.