Convinced I am having seizures now

I do trust neurologists but as the brain is so complexed I am also aware that they can only go off clinical history and no fully testing can prove the difference between panic attacks or seizures. 

You've contradicted yourself there Jonathan, you either trust their opinion and diagnosis or you don't, there is no grey area.

Your ignoring the fact that your not exoeriencing the real symptoms of a partial seizure mentioned earlier by Jmcg and me.

Yes the more you worry the more the symptoms will come and gain in intensity you are making yourself worse, worry won't and doesn't bring on seizures only ever increasing anxiety for you, it's become a serious obsession Jonathan and one you need help with but it will be difficult to help you if your mind is not open to the fact that this is you causing your anxiety, it's like an alcoholic not accepting they have a drink problem, they can't be helped, I don't want to worry you anymore but I don't know what else I can do or say other than keep an open mind to this being pure anxiety. Good luck tomorrow at the GPs and let us know how you get on. Neil 

This i my problem I cannot shrug off these symptoms. Everytime I am trying to forget about it then it hits me even stronger. It has got to the point that when the intense waves come over me I feel like this is the one that will progress into a generalised seizure. Even in between the intense ones I am all day in a state of panic with loads of little mini ones throughout the day where my vision will just go dark and the panic builds up around my head and then the adrenaline through my body and hot and cold flashes. 

Ask for a referal to see a therapist to help you, noones saying you should do it on your own

I am doing at my GP appointment tomorrow. My worry JMCG is what after all this time both my gp and neuro have misdiagnosed me and these really are epileptic partial seizures

Then they will have misdiagnosed you and you will have epileptic partial seizures which is treateable, simple as. 

On the other hand what if it's just your anxiety which again is treateable. 

Neil 

You could say that about everything, what if a common cold is cancer of the sinuses, what if stomach ache is stomach cancer....thats no way to live life.  Health care professionals know all the warning signs, and your not presenting any - i think its safe to assume they are correct

Hi Neil,

My GP appointment is at 4.50pm so will keep you informed. However I have just received a letter from the neurologist I went to see who tried to provide me some reassurance too. Please see details below.

In your email from 22 August 2017 to Jill you queried 2 things which you forgot to mention. The first issue is that you said you have these intense waves of fear coming over you and which you are getting numerous times daily. You said that it feels like the whole room went colder and darker and your vision becomes cloudy. You find it hard to communicate because it was so intense. You have memory dream flashbacks and déjà vu feelings. You wondered if these were possibly simple-partial seizures. Also, you wondered what they could be if they will progress.

My comment: simple partial seizures are normally one sided symptoms with numbness or repetitive movements. These are normally one sided, so either leg or an arm on either side of your body is moving rapidly. You can also sometimes have twitches which are simple focal seizures. They often generate into so-called complex focal seizures where you have altered consciousness, you then stare into space, do certain chewing mouth movements and also repetitive movements. The difference between simple and complex focal seizure is that the simple focal seizures you are always conscious which is not the case with complex focal seizures.

Reading your email, I don’t think you have either of them and that these symptoms are really caused by your anxiety.

The second issue was that you have a massive fear of seizures and that is constantly in your thoughts. You wondered if anxiety can create these feelings and symptoms.

My comment: You are absolutely right that this anxiety can cause these emotions. There are a lot of patients nowadays who have a fear of organic symptoms. Not surprisingly this is often a symptom we find with people working in the health business who deal a lot with cancer symptoms. I for instance have had several staff members from Christie Hospital here in Manchester who are highly anxious that they will develop some cancer disease because of the daily fates and quite frightening patient stories they are confronted with.

There are also patients who have a high fear of seizures and we normally differentiate them in patients who have actually have had seizures and who have not had seizures. The patients who have epilepsy have sometimes have a warning sign of epilepsy which is also a kind of fear. We call this aura. Then the other group of patients are just frightened of having seizures due to their anxiety. I would quite openly say that you probably belong to this group.