Coping alone after hip replacement

Posted , 8 users are following.

I don't know if anyone here is in the same boat as me, living alone and facing hip replacement.  If there is, my message to you is don't worry - it can be done.

I was very nervous about how I was going to manage when I was discharged from hospital.  I organised everything in my home to be just right, setting up a 'station' by my favourite chair with a basket containing all my necessaries (comb, mirror, pen, notepad,  tissues, moisturiser, hand cream, remote controls), trailing socket for easy access plug sockets for laptop, phone and hairdryer etc.  

I bought a mobility trolley with two shelves for anything I needed to move from room to room which I kept on the other side of my chair, and on it I keep my phone, book, grabber, long handled shoe horn, jug of water (with lid - very important!), glass, medication and specs.  It's also great for bringing meals and drinks through so I can eat in comfort.  

I asked a few friends if they would be on the end of the phone for me. They had in fact already offered but I wanted to be sure they really were happy to be 'on-call' in an emergency.  Of course my children are also there for me but both out at work all day and living further away than my friends.

The first night was scary I must admit but it was okay.  My trolley was next to the bed and safe and stable to trundle to the toilet and back.  My mobile phone was on it just in case, as were my painkillers if I needed them in the noght (which I did).  When that first night was over and I had managed to get myself up and into the living room nursing the first coffee of the morning I felt a huge sense of achievement.

Simple meals were easy.  I had stocked up on ready meals, soup etc, but found I was able to make egg on toast, cheese on toast, porridge and bacon sandwiches.

Each day my confidence increased and I found it easy to put a load of washing in, take it out with my grabber and hang it on an airer.  

A strip wash in the bathroom was easy - no need to rush it.  Washing my hair was easiest over the kitchen sink with a bowl of hot water on the draining board and a jug to pour water over my head.  I needed an extra towel to mop up the water I spilt on the floor -DANGER ZONE!

Living alone through this is both a blessing and a curse.  I have had to do things maybe a partner would have done for me and I'm sure that has helped with confidence, movement and strengthening muscles.  For instance, there had been no-one to help lift my leg into bed so I have been doing it and now I don't even give it a second thought,  I just lift it right into bed.  The flip side is there's always a "but what if ???" at the back of my mind when I try something new, but planning it in my head instead of charging in is the key here.

Things you will need help with:

TED stockings if you have them - impossible to put on alone for a couple of weeks.

Shopping - do it online or ask a friend.

Lifts - if you have appoinments to attend.

I'm sorry for the epistle.  I just wanted anyone who is facing this alone to know you don't have to be Superwoman or Superman.  It's all about planning, positivity and a few good friends.

Cels xxx

6 likes, 26 replies

26 Replies

  • Posted

    I should have added that I live on one floor which of course has made things so much easier.  I did stairs in the hospital but am very glad I have none at home, although others have managed them well.  

     

  • Posted

    Fabulous post and a big respect to you for being so positive I'm not sure I would have coped as well as you seem to be doing

    Good luck with your full recovery

    Catrin

    • Posted

      You could if you had to Catrin and that's the point I was trying to make.  I know how I felt beforehand and if my post can help just one person to be less afraid that's fab.

      biggrin

  • Posted

    Cels, you are inspirational and I am sure this will help anyone facing this op when living alone.

    I had my partner with me for the first few days and then I was on my own during the day.

    I agree, that in whatever situation you are living in, safety and planning is paramount. I got obsessed with making sure that the floor was dry and made people take off their shoes!! I also have an excitable Jack Russell who piddles when anyone calls. I had to make guests go on pee patrol so my crutch didn't slip!

    • Posted

      Yes, especially after Rose's fall.  Puddles beware!  
  • Posted

    Hi cells

    I too went it alone and I was terrified. I think when living on your own you have to be organised and think ahead.

    I live in a house which fortunately has a downstairs loo. I have stairs that have a return top and bottom and as my other hip also requires replacing and is unstable, I made the decision not to use the stairs and turned my lounge into a bed sit.

    I am now 9 weeks post op and with caution, climbing the stairs.

    I am having my second op in six months time and the difference is, I am not at all worried or concerned because I have been there; got the tee shirt and know I can go it alone and I have nothing to fear.

    So glad you posted this to help others in a similar situation.

    Morrie

    • Posted

      Well, I knew how worried I was Morrie, and it would be nice if it helps someone else.

      I think you did absolutely the right thing to use the lounge.  You have to plan your recovery around where the loo is situated smile

    • Posted

      Absolutely!

      I used a walker with a tray attachment to carry my food into the lounge and also a plastic cup with a handle and lid for my drinks.

      Then, of course, when you have little concerns, there is this site with people like you to put your mind at ease.

      Thank you.

      💃

    • Posted

      Indeed, this site has been a lifesaver for me.  I'd have gone mad without it!

      cheesygrin

  • Posted

    Your are an insperation cels you are doing really well

    Laura xx

  • Posted

    Hi cels

    I have so much admiration for you managing on your own, I don't know how you have done it. I had my daughter and partner at home and would have been lost without them. Just standing up from a sitting position was tough at first. You have done so well managing on your own, you should be proud of yourself.im now nearly 5 weeks post op and doing well,no crutches. I see my consultant 1 week today and I'm so hoping he says I can drive.

    Take care

    Lisa xx

    • Posted

      Awww Lisa thank you.  But I really just wanted to put it out there for people like me who are perhaps worrying how on earth they are going to manage, and say "You can do it".

      Cels xxx

  • Posted

    Thank you for your encouraging story. The fact that I live alone as well as being quite old (80 in 2 months time) has me very scared about managing after the op. and the worry of doing something stupid to damage the new joint.

    Just knowing someone is there when getting in and out of bed, or to help when needed would take away some of that anxiety.

    However I take your point that being alone helps you to become more independent by necessity.

    I had a major operation some time ago,(when much younger)and certainly made a much faster recovery than expected and was back at work in less time than usual.

    At that time I was careful to do as I was told,no heavy lifting etc. and despite being in a 3 story house I coped with no probs.

    The difference  was that my hips/legs/back were not involved.

    Your message is very helpful. In fact so much that I read on this forum is so useful.

    Good luck with your continued recovery.

    Joyx

     

    • Posted

      Hi Joy,

      I don't know where you live but in my area the local health authority are pretty stingy about sending out help, either in the form of carers or district nurses.  You may well find that your health authority are more helpful, especially with you being a little older.

      When I was in hospital one of the nurses said to me (privately), "If you don't think you can cope on your own say so.  They can't make you leave until you are ready.  You have to be assertive and tell them how you feel".  I felt I could cope but remember this Joy, and refuse to come home until you are ready.  Stick to your guns and you may well find they put a care package in place for you planned around your needs.  I think they kept me in for an extra day because I live alone but on the day of my discharge I felt ready to go.  They won't chuck you out of the door and tell you to get on with it, they can't.  This is what I have been told.

      This forum is fabulous and has been so supportive for me.  No question has been too silly or trivial.  We have all been through what you will be going through and here to support you as well as we can.

      Do you have a date yet?  Stay in touch and let is know how it goes.

      Cels xxx

    • Posted

      Joy,

      Take note of what Cels has said there, she is absolutely right, they cannot let you out if you cannot cope adequately.  The first time around, I 'failed' my stairs test as I knew I wasn't ready to be let loose.

      Graham - 🚀💃

    • Posted

      Dear Cels 

      Thank you for that. I am inclined to not be be assertive enough,mainly because I have been too keen to put the whole thing off(out of cowardice) and to believe that as my doctor said the condition is not life threatening I could carry on as I was.

      Family and friends have been urging me to push for treatment and to insist that I need it.

      So I have dilly dallied since my first exray in 2013 and of course I am getting worse.Have not yet seen a consultant surgeon,am waiting for a referral now.

      I was sent to a muscosleletal clinic. My son came with me and urged me to say that I want a THR. The process here in Befordshire is via the MS clinic.

      They sent me for another Xray and I am waiting for the referral.

      A lot of the delay is my own fault,but on the plus side that has allowed me to learn a lot,and to find this amazing supportive forum.

      Thank you for your advice..

      Everyone on this forum is ready with help and support,whatever the concern.

      I am in Dunstable,Beds by the way.They seem to do things differently here.

      Best wishes to you

      Joyxx

       

    • Posted

      I think we all put it off Joy, and when you've had your referral and are put on the list I bet you'll think, "What have I done?".  The answer will be, you have done exactly the right thing.

      Right now I would advise you to keep as active as you can even though you are in pain, because the stronger you can keep your muscles the better your recovery.  I had to give up bowling unfortunately because I just couldn't go on any longer, but I kept at it for as long as I could.  

      I have a nephew in Leighton Buzzard.  Not too far from you.

      Cels xxx

    • Posted

      Thank you Cels

      In fact I try to be as active as possible. After my first xray I saw a Physio therapist  who gave me exercises to do.

       Consulted google.and determined to lose weight went off to Cyprus where I swam at least a mile each day, religiously followed the exercise regime watched my food intake managed to lose about a stone,now 9 and a half stone,which is below my bmi according to my practice nurse

       

      Back in UK went back to my lovely Physiotherapist who said I need to see an orthopeadic surgeon not physio as something is wrong which  she could not help with. However the exercises have strengthened the muscles which she said will help if need an operation.

      At present I am not swimming here in UK although I used to swim a mile a day in my local pool.Currently however I make myself walk every day an average of 5000 steps.I have a wrist monitor to count my steps which pushes me to get out even on rainy days. Having a record on my tablet makes me determined to keep up the walking, just to see that graph is encouraging!

      Although it is getting more painful.I know very well the importance of staying active. So I believe I am doing the right things in preparation.

      Many thanks for your advice and good luck for your ongoing recovery.

      Joyx

       

    • Posted

      Thanks Joy,

      You are certainly more active than I was.  Unfortunately I'm not a great swimmer, although it is something I would love to be able to do.  A year ago I signed up for an Improvers' Swimming Class, but it was cancelled through lack of interest.  It's something I would perhaps try again when I'm recovered, although when I'm back bowling it seems to take over my life.

      Take care,

      Cels xxx

    • Posted

      Hi joy

      No matter what your age, to face unknown major surgery is, extremely frightening. I too live on my own and was terrified.

      I'm sure that either Social services or your local Authority will set up a care plan for you.

      Prior to the op your home will be assessed and you will be given whatever is deemed necessary. For instance your toilet may be too low or too high; you may need a small chair to enable you to safely wash or eat.

      A physio will show you the exercises that you must do to strengthen muscles.

      In hospital you will have crutches and also a walker that will have your name on them and you will be able to take them home.

      Becsuse I am on my own I remained in hospital for an extra day by which time I felt ready.

      There are aids that you will need to purchase. Your physio will give you a leaflet.

      You cannot bend past ninety degrees and the most needed gadget is a reacher. I have three! One is permanently attached by string, to my walker. I chose in the early days whilst indoors to use the walker. To it I attached a builders apron with pockets in which I was able to carry my drinking water bottle. A sandwich I would wrap in cling film to place in a pocket. I bought a mini flask with a top and handle which was perfect for both hot and cold drinks

      I thought of everything i used to wash and all items i kept in a plastic bowl within my kitchen which is where I chose to wash. Whilst washing and to keep safe I put the walker around me. You will need a long handled sponge which again will be on the list of gadgets supplied.

      Just think ahead Joy. I am going to have a wash. Is everything i need immediately to hand. Especially towels. My very first strip wash and I left the towels on my bed and had to use kitchen roll. You will also need a towel to stand on.

      It's daunting but so worth it. Im nine weeks post op. I need a further op in the Autumn and already my operated hip and leg is stronger by far than the un operated side.

      We have all been in the same position and are here to help.

      Please excuse the lack of punctuation. I am using my spare smart phone which actually isn't that smart.

      Dduw bendithia chi 💕

      Morrie xx

    • Posted

      Dear Morriewyn

      Thank you that is so helpful and encouraging. The problem is that no-one has explained who will organise the home assessment and I was assuming I would have to sort everything out for myself.

      Maybe I am worrying unnecessarily.I am frankly terrified of the whole procedure.

      Thank goodness for the forum.It is very obvious that lack of information and where to find it is a worry for many people.

      Exchange of info.based on experience of others going through the same thing is a great comfort.

      Your advice to prepare ahead of time is great. Just when I try to plan ahead I am daunted by it all, but no doubt I will get it together when the time comes.

      thanks again

      Joyx

    • Posted

      Hi Cels

      I know what you mean,when I swim it takes over my life too.That's why I have had to give it a miss for now.

      I am not a good swimmer,very very slow and with a rubbish style.

      The mile swim takes me one and a half hours,then walking there and back plus time to change which takes ages,by the time I get home I am too exhausted to do anything else.

      But I so enjoy swimming and it is painless compared with walking.

      I do wonder if daily swimming breast stroke for years has contributed to my hip condition.

      I can't do front crawl and now I have stopped doing breast stroke which is bad for the hip I do a miserable style which the kids at the pool tell me is doggy paddle.I don't care I still enjoy it and believe it is good exercise.

      As for the daily walks,I am using a stick and doubled over like an old crone, still I believe it is better to move as much as possible so as not to cease up completely.

      Just stubborn I guess.

      Joyx

    • Posted

      Hi Joy,

      When you see your surgeon,  inform him that you are planning on arranging a couple of weeks in convalescence so you need a confirmed date asap.

      Re walking like a crone, I am already walking in an upright position with just a tiny limp;  friends say I am walking much better than I was before the op.  

      Absolutely, better to move as much as you can.  I have heard on this forum that breast stroke is not advised after the op either, obviously the leg movement breaks the restrictions for the first few weeks, and as you have found it is an awkward movement for a sore hip to make.

      I can do the front crawl, with an awful lot of splashing and not actually getting very far.  It tires me out and then I start wheezing (asthmatic).  I know my technique leaves a lot to de desired.  I learned to dive before I could swim and yes, I also used to manage a glorified doggie paddle to the side.  I'm not at all afraid of water and as I said, would seriously think about lessons if I could fit them around what I hope to be, once more, a busy bowling life.  I was competing at county level before I had to give up and it was an immense disappointment for me.

      It was the occupational therapist who organised my home assessment, although it mostly consisted of me measuring the height of my bed, toilet, dining chairs and chair that I would be sitting in.  I took these measurements to my appointment where she measured my legs from floor to knee, and told me what needed raising.  I had already bought a raised toilet seat as I was stgruggling to get on and off the loo.  She asked about the layout of my home.  I don't have stairs so that was one less worry.  Mind, I got in on a cancellation so everything was a bit rushed.  I had a phone call on Wednesdahy that my operation would be the following Thursday, so I had the pre-op on the following day and saw the o/t on the Friday.  Huge initial panic but everything worked out well.  It kept me very busy for the next few days and gave me less time to worry. 

      Cels xxx

    • Posted

      Joy

      Do stop worrying, it isn't going to do you any favours.  We are all here tohelp you, just as we were helped when we first came here.

      Do look at my website, it has lots of information on what to expect.

      My own home assessment was a 'DIY' affair. I was given a sheet, to tick, and fill in the boxes with measurements of chair, bed and toilets.

      I even took photos on my phone, which was useful to show them so they could see if a full toilet seat with arms would fit in for instance.

      Just take it slowly, one step at a time, we've all been through it, and survived smile.

      Graham - 🚀💃

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