Counselling?

Posted , 5 users are following.

I have posted on this forum previously and upon reflection I feel it nesicary to speak to a professional. I'm 16 and currently sitting exams so I'm going to postpone any kind of treatment until after I've finished my last exam. I have been struggling with feelings of depression, worry, upset, emptiness and overall am not happy or content. I don't want to speak with anyone face to face as I'd rather remain anonymous so I feel email Counciling would be ideal. However I cannot fund it and I haven't spoken to anyone about this issue so I can't gather money elsewhere. All of this has led me feeling stuck down a dark hole I can't gather any ideas on how to get out. If anyone can recommend me to an online Counselling service that doesn't require me to pay or a counselling service where I can talk to the person until I feel comfortable enough to have face to face Counselling with that person, (The prospect of having to go to a strangers house and no one to know that I'm there petrifys me) I would be so grateful.

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  • Posted

    Dear Katie,  I feel for you and wish I could say something which would really help. I do understand that you want to get the exams behind you but please seek out someone as soon as possible after they are over.  I'm assuming you live in the UK and as I live in the US I don't know what services you might find free of charge. Sometimes just having a good friend who is sympathetic and has a ready ear without judging you can help.  You must not be afraid of meeting a counselor or doctor face to face. They are in the profession of listening.  Are you a church goer?  Clergy people can sometimes be of help - without expecting a fee. I hope that expressing yourself in this forum brings you some relief.  When I was about 19 or 20 I had awful phobias - fear of catching some fatal disease, being crippled by polio, or dying in a house fire. My nights were terrifying.  Even my wonderful and patient father got tired of hearing of my fears.  I was engaged to marry at the time.  I broke my engagement for other resons and after that I began to recover.  Years later I was in a hotel fire, and later still was diagnosed with cancer (over 5 years ago).  Neither of these real experiences terrified me as much as the imagined ones.   Those days we didn't seek psychological counseling as we do today.  Years ago people thought you were ready for an insane asymlum if you talked about going to a psychiatrist.  That is certainly not the case today.  Millions of perfectly sane people are in therapy.  I say "Good for them for seeking help".  Some people find the following helpful:  Imagine you lived in some war torn country without shelter, food, or safety.  Read the papers and you'll find multitudes of people in awful places in the world who are in constant danger. Think of those 200 girls in Nigeria who were kidnapped by terrorists and are still not found.   Then think of where you are.  By comparison most of us in the Western World are pretty comfortable and safe.   This comparison doesn't work for everyone but it has helped me from time to time.  I'm thinking of you and wishing you well.
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    • Posted

      Thank you so much for your advice. Yes I currently live in the UK and it must be said the services provided for mental illnesses are not brilliant here, I think that having to pay to feel better and stable is unfair I didn't wish this upon myself nor would I wish it upon anyone it is horrible to feel this way. I don't have anyone other that professionals I can really talk to. My family probably would be understanding but I know that they would be disappointed in me and there opinions and they way they act towards me would change entirely, that's a situation I wish to avoid as it will leave me feeling worse, I don't have friends that I could talk to they wouldn't be understanding and I feel as if they may have contributed to the problem. I wouldn't really class anyone as my 'friend' and I have trust issues because of the way they have treated me. But I'm going to take your advice and speak to a professional, how did you go about this? What did you say to your doctor?
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  • Posted

    Hi katie, first of all you are doing fab girl,you have recognised something is wrong and you are being pro-active in stating to address stuff,try taking baby steps and i would suggest googling depression and local support specific to your area eg. i am in bucks/oxfordshire and we have healthy minds.my cousin in suffolk has something similar.Make sure initially an nhs/gov uk site and i probably could have made this simpler to explain.Anyway you have the option to do stuff online /telephone etc.i have just been looking at re-think mental illness online and that has links to local support . Hope this makes sense as my head a bit foggy this morning Best Wishes L

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    • Posted

      Thank you, being in the forum has helped a lot as I feel like I don't have to bottle everything up its nice to know you're not alone within this issue. Your advice has really helped I've been looking at different counselling options around my area, a majority of which are one which I have to pay for but I'm going to try and gather the money and I'm hoping that explaining the financial situation to some of them might help?
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  • Posted

    Hi Katie, 

     first off YOUR DOING GREAT it's a long time since I sat exams but anytime I've sat an exam/test I always get a bit well you know, have you tried you GP to get on the waiting list now while your sitting exams that way hopefully you won't have to wait too long after you've finished for some councilling.

    having just finished a series of councilling sessions albeit not for depression mine was  as a result of my marriage breaking down I can strongly recommend face to face councilling for me it has worked I still have things to work on but everyday gets better.

    good luck try to keep smiling and keep posting.

         FC x

     

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    • Posted

      Thank you, you don't even know how grateful I am that you posted when you did,I'm currently in a bit of you know,, state? Your first sentence honestly stopped me from doing anyone drastic so thank you so much. I haven't spoken to my doctor as I'm so scared to and I don't know how I'd get in touch with a councillor that I can trust. I currently don't have a job so I don't know how I'd be able to fund Counciling is there anyway that I could still attend it?
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  • Posted

    Dear Katie,  As you can see from the many replies on this forum  we are all pulling for you.  We think you're great for confronting your problems.  In answer to your question to me about how to go about speaking with a professional.  I have a GP whom I visit for annual check-ups, or when I'm feeling physically ill.  She knows me pretty well and  one day during one of my visits to her I just told her that I had lost my lust for life.  I didn't care if I lived or died.  I wasn't thinikng about suicide but was feeling sad.  This was an unusal experience for me as I have always been energetic - I loved to travel, etc.  Now it's an effort.  She prescribed mirtazapine which is somewhat effective - it's low dose only 15 mg. taken at night.  I find I sleep very well but get sleepiy during the day.  I also saw another doctor and a counselor.  They both were patient and kind and I will return to see them if the mirtazapine ceases to work.  Doctors are used  to hearing all kinds of problems and as a patient you must not  be timid about telling them what you are suffering. Mental and  emotional problems are NOTHING to be ashamed.  Please get help soon.  You deserve it.  All the best from this side of the pond, as they say.  It's a national holiday here  wiith parades, flags waving, etc. to honor the men  and women who have served and died in all our wars.  You probably have some kind of a remembrance  day, too.It's very touching.   Good luck with your exams.   
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  • Posted

    Hi katie52188,

    I understand how you feel, having suffered from depression for several years. I think StepstoWellbeing is the best service that could help you. If you go on their website, they offer over the phone confidential calls for free. They are all trained therapists and I have had face to face therapy with them myself. It might sound a bit heavy going "therapy" but it's important to understand that all kinds of people need therapy and it doesn't mean you're crazy or any different to other people. I also believe that it's important to tackle depression/anxiety as soon as it occurs as I kept it inside when I was younger and did not want to face it.

    Speaking aloud about my problems and not being ashamed of them has helped me grow in self confidence greatly.

    Take care, and good luck, isnowdropi

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  • Posted

    Hi...I hope that thing's are improving for you but if not and you're still feeling low. My advice to you and any young person struggling is firstly, speak to your Dr explaining how you feel (if you're unsure what to say, write it down beforehand and take it to your appointment)  Ask to be referred to someone that you can talk to. If s/he doesn't provide support you must ask for a 2nd opinion. Regarding the Internet. NEVER offer payment to anyone offering you Counselling. Do not click on to the Ad's on the right hand side of pages. Above all, you must NOT arrange to meet with anyone you've met on the Internet and ALWAY'S use a reputable site eg; http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/Pages/children-depressed-signs.aspx ...Try to think positive whilst moving forward. I wish you all the bestsmile xXx
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