Dating

Posted , 6 users are following.

So I was diagnosed 2 months ago with hsv 2, and I've Been on 3 dates with someone new. We've been talking/texting non stop. I'm seeing him tomorrow. It's been weighing on me when to tell him and how. I don't want to waste his time and I don't know if this is why I've been SUPER awkward. Help?

0 likes, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • Posted

    this is my worry when i start seeing someone new! i only found out a week ago and i'm so stressed about it. i'm not sure if this is helpful but i have been watching tons of videos on youtube and one that really helped was called Herpes 101. the way she explains everything has given me more insite on how i would try and tell someone i'm seeing.

    good luck, if he really likes you he will be able to look past this. just remember to use a condom and don't have sex while you have an outbreak. my doctor told me being a girl and having it means if we have an outbreak we have the best excuse "period"

    if you don't have an outbreak and use a condom it limits the risk of giving it to someone a lot! so when you tell him also try and give him reassurance if your relationship is really serious but he is still a bit hesitant maybe take him to your doctor and your doctor can give him some more insite about it all!

    x

  • Posted

    I didn't tell the guy I've been talking with and dating until things were getting hot. I already felt really comfortable with him. Now I'm just dealing with him feeling anxious because of it. He told me last night that he cried about it because he felt bad I got it the way I did since the guy I slept with didn't tell me he had it. I don't want him to get it. I know better than to have unprotected sex now, as well as having sex while I'm symptomatic. He said he felt bad that he felt anxious about it and he went and got tested for everything.

  • Posted

    Hard to say, it is up to you... one night stands provides some ideas on how to behave in this situation...

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  • Posted

    Hey sweet how are you?

    Been there done that I'll tell you my story

    Okay so I'm recently diagnosed myself 6 months and through most of that up until a month ago I stayed with the guy who gave it me because I thought no one else would want me I was miserable and depressed and waned to die 

    So eventually I thought 

    I'd rather die alone than to die with the wrong person 

    So I left him

    I started speaking to a somebody else my idea was to just sack it off because I might get bored 

    But Christ I liked him more and more everyday I saw him

    I have accepted herpes seriously it doesn't bother me anymore, but that's what made me really upset I hated my situation, I wasn't going to tell him and was just going to back out but I thought 

    I can either not tell him and lose him anyway or tell him and get a 50% chance 

    So I waited until I KNEW she actually liked me ( I think 2/3 dates is very early still) 

    When it got to the time I was worming up that I had something to tell him 

    And the key to it is don't bloody cry or don't say 'you probably won't want me after this' because you're making it sound terrible

    Just say 'hey I got something to tell you before we go closer it's a bit of an inconvience really' and because I was nervous I went about it by saying that and followed by 'do you know what causes cold sores' (of course he didn't know) so I made him google it and it comes up straight away 'herpes' god that hurt him looking at that, I told him how and when, I told him the risks of him getting it so constant condoms and suppression it's like 5% risk for the whole year 

    I kept calm and acted like it was like telling him I get grey hairs sometimes haha 

    He then proceeded to say 'oh thank god, I thought you was about to tell me you was born a man' 

    I laughed but just waned him to understand more so I said 

    Look just go home and research and he was all like 'listen nothing will change my mind' and the next day he text me saying the same thing 

    I was relieved and we spoke about it more the next day more openly 

    He's so sweet and lovely about it and is still as sexually into me as he was before

    We've been seeing each other a month now and haven't had sex yet though (because last 2 weeks I've been away) and the first 2 weeks was the start and it took me a week to tell him, and I was going to do it tonight and guess what? OUTBREAK 😂😂😂 fml 

    But I'm due on tomorrow anyway so I'm just gonna say it came a day early hahaha, I do have fears like that I'll pass it on (I'm more bothered he doesn't really care) I'm scared he will leave me to find someone 'clean' I'm scared he'll leave me in general because everyday I like him more

    But all was good 

    Let me know how it goes?

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