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Dating with herpes.

Posted , 9 users are following.

jxo
jxo

Why is it so difficult to find people who are open minded to the issue? I've had herpes for 9 years and I've had every reaction in the book. People who are disgusted. People who think it's some sort of fetish. Where are all the normal accepting people?

0 likes, 11 replies

11 Replies

  • LostnConfused
    LostnConfused jxo

    Posted

    I am a male and surprising I get the same results. I've learned that it's better to start a friendship first no sex and just hangout get to know each other and progress from that point. Once it comes to dating or sex, then I share status and it seem to almost always be a positive experience and not a rejection. However, not everyone is willing to take a risk once they know what we have and are dealing with. Seem to me the uneducated ones are the rudest and because of lack of understanding, they are not sensitive to the issue.
  • cartercali
    cartercali jxo

    Posted

    I don't know I'm still trying to find out my dang self ..

    Like it's crazy

    I didn't ask for this disease and the person that infected me never once let me know they had it .. Otherwise I wouldn't of went for it

    So I mean can I blame them ??

    How has your process been with the disease so far ??

    How many outbreaks ? The person that infected you .. You don't communicate with them ? Did you ever try to make the stuff right between them ?

    • jxo
      jxo cartercali

      Posted

      I think if the person who gave it to me had been honest I would have made sure to be protected but still went for it.

      I live had it for a long time now so I rarely get outbreaks anymore. After I found out I had it I completely shut the guy out of my life and never spoke to him again.

    • cartercali
      cartercali jxo

      Posted

      i completely understand where youre coming from.. 

      and i can honestly say that contracting this disease has opened my eyes up quite alot.. like totally and completely . 

      before i caught this disease i wouldnt of even considered anything like this and i guess you can say that its just karma.. you know

      ?

      i mean the person that infected me finally admitted to infecting me and actually apologized to me.. the mother of his child he claims doesnt even have it .. how in the world is that possible ?! when me and him only had sex twice unprotected..only god knows how many times him and the other female does..

      i have no idea how to date someone with this thing .. i mean i didnt and wouldnt of accepted the disease before i had it so i cant be mad at someone else for thinking the same way i did.. condom or not i seriously couldnt risk myself like that.. but wth.. karma came back to me i can say that .. 

      my main question for you is how do you come out and tell people about the disease ? at one point i was totally confidence now things have changed drastically .. 

      the only person that knows about what i have is my boyfriend ./ current and i have no idea what is going on with us or if we are even gonna be together.. i dont want him to feel like he is tied down.. you know ?

      since you have had this virus have you been in a serious relationship ? how did that work out if you dont mind me asking ..

  • Alexinator
    Alexinator jxo

    Posted

    Same here, people don't understand this virus so they push us away. The girl who I thought I would end up marrying (does not have herpes) pretty much just ignores me at this point and moved on. It is crazy how having this can just turn you into a nobody. Keep faith though, we'll find someone to be with. Whether or not they have this disease or not.
  • Helpunderstand
    Helpunderstand jxo

    Posted

    I've only just found out I have HSV 1 genital, am petrified of telling any future partners and feel like I'm going to just get rejected and someone could let the secret come out 😫

    Really struggling to come to terms with it

    • jenny37667
      jenny37667 Helpunderstand

      Posted

      Hsv1 is really nothing .I Hsv1 for 10 years. I have not gotten rejected. With hsv 2 might be different. A lot of people do get reject having type 2. It is hard to find someone who can understand the virus. Some people are lucky and some people are not. I been diagnosed 2 years ago of hsv2. I went crazy. I just don't understand why some people can't be honest if they have it. I was wanted to hurt that guy. For giving it to me.
  • jenny37667
    jenny37667 jxo

    Posted

    Do you have a hard time dating because of herpes?

    Have you ever got rejected by someone you really like?

  • alexs55
    alexs55 jxo

    Posted

    Hey Jxo,

    I think you are having this for now 9 years , you can be a guiding point for many of us, who has got this HSV in recent time. I am a 27 year male with HSV 2 (G) and i got this because somebody was dishonest about his status, I dont want to blame her because i should have used proper protection by myself. I got this 2 months back and i have couple of questions for you:

    1. How has been the journey so far physically, in term of nerve pain(even i dont see any visible outbreak but i have pain near my groin), outbreaks.

    2. How has been your love life so far ?

    3. How old are you now?

    • jenny37667
      jenny37667 alexs55

      Posted

      I don't have nerve pain at all. My love life is ok. I'm happy he expected it. I was concern. I'm 36 years old
    • m28548
      m28548 jenny37667

      Posted

      I'd appreciate any advice as well.  I'm spending time with someone new and we've had a lot of sexual tension.  He's tried to take it to the next level and I've just said that I'm not ready to jump into that yet.  I'm a 27 year old female, and was diagnosed with HSV2 5 months ago. I take suppressive medication and haven't had any symptoms since my initial OB. Even my initial OB was more flu-like symptoms and must have been internal lesions since it was painful to use the bathroom but I had no visible sores or anything.   I'm terrified to bring this up and how he might react to it. I've done lots of reading on my own so I know how common it is, but its still hard to think of how to start this discussion -- any advice at all?  What types of reactions have you gotten from people over the years, and what is the most common?
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