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First off thank you all for your posts and feedback I have read concerning others. Honestly over the last 6 weeks or so I've really gotten into the antidepresants , how they work and how they don't work , the good ,the bad and the ugly of them all , from these Forums to countless You-Tube videos and documentaries ......Wow ! What was I thinking I keep asking myself ? The side effects started on me since day one ! I went to shrink over a month ago and he prescribed this 20mg a day Cit for me and told me to come back in two weeks (it was for panic attacks / depression) I had already started reading up on it and I must admit I was rather shaken by side effects and withdraw symtoms I read about .....I didn't take them and told him when I went back to see him two weeks later .....I told him what I just wrote here and he said everybody was different when it came to side effects and ask me if I wanted to feel better ? I said yes , he re-wrote the scrip for Cit and told me to come back in a month ......I'm just not liking this stuff at all and the side effects are no fun ....(Lord knows I'm not alone from this Forum) I just don't know what to think and the way I feel ......things had been getting better for me since I lost 40 pounds over the last 4 months or so and started eating better and less , my every now and then panic attacks I was handling them better and they were less ......Honestly , I thought the Doc would just give me something as needed and that unfortunately didn't happen .......I'm 56 years old and Lord knows my wife and I have are somewhat over flowing with problems at the moment but feeling as I do now after 6 days on the Cit .......It's not helping me other then making me feel worse then ever before ...I'm not a pill taker to say that I am , I don't drink or use drugs of any kind and I've always been somewhat sensative to drugs , even over the counter ....like opiates for pain over the years , always so glad to get off those as soon as I could because I didn't like the way they made me feel......(although they did help with pain) I have basically been force feeding myself since day 1 of taking this Cit .....I look at food and it makes me sickish .......my head is here nor there........I somewhat had a scare on day 2 of Cit and it was really strange ....I felt my heart start as it usually does at panic stage but I had that shocking feeling go down both my arms and to my hands ....that was surely a new one on me ! Wow ! but I handled it OK .....I don't know ? feels like a roller coaster ride from hell ! ....I ask myself now ....would I rather just deal with my panic attacks as is and not this roller coaster ride I've been on ? I'd have to say yes ....my thing is this , can I stop this Cit now without to much withdraw on 6 days ? .....I know I know I know ! .....hang in there and all that , I get that , I really do ......I just would rather have my somewhat normal brain back and I mean no offence to anyone .....I figure it's 50/50 for me as is .......the only thing I do know now is that I'm sorry I messed with my own head only to make matters that much more uncomfortable for myself .....I've read a lot here on this Forum and everybody seems very kind , nice and understanding ......I just feel the need to stop and I'm hoping after a week my withdraw won't be so bad ? Thank you all for your time.
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