Dealing with Anxiety in silence
Posted , 6 users are following.
Speaking my issues outloud has never been something I have been good at doing, not because I am not honest, and not because I do not want to express my anxieties, but because I do not want to burden others with my issues. I feel as though if I truly express how I am feeling, and look to an outlet for relief, that it will somehow weigh on that individual and then who will they go to? This is one of the main reasons I have feared/steered away from going to seek professional help because I feel like they see so many cases each day of so many painful things, and they have all of these things weighing so heavy on them, who helps them? I know they are armed with tools and knowledge to help, but I just feel bad. I guess that is my anxiety playing tricks on my mind.
Another issue with dealing with my anxiety/depression is that everyone thinks I am the happiest person on the planet. I often times put on a smile and I am the one telling all of the jokes and making everyone laugh when really some days I want to break down and cry. I have been this way ever since I can remember. The protector, the fixer, the stability and calm in the storm, when really I have tornados and hurricanes going on in my own mind that I am trying to balance out. I have good days where the laughter is real and things feel fine, but other days it takes everything in my to step outside of my house. I don't lay in bed all day, but stepping outside of my house sometimes can take every ounce of my energy.
And when I say I suffer in silence it is not like I have family that does not understand. Many members of my family, including both my siblings, my mother, and my grandmother all suffer from anxiety and depression, but again I have tried to be the strong one for so long I think I would just feel like a failure really admitting to them that I need help. Is it my pride? Is it my anxiety? This is so frustrating and complicated but I think I am the one making it that way.
1 like, 11 replies
jade1797 britt88262
Posted
Talking about anxiety can be something very difficult, one of my best friends has always been so so open about her anxiety and I have been her rock. I always felt like I didn't want to talk about the anxiety I was struggling with because I wanted to be there for her more, I wanted to be the listener and the one who could help my friends.
The last year has been a tough one and I bottled it up for ages, I finally broke down when I realised that I too needed help and I couldn't be there for my friends and family if I didn't feel well myself. That was when I realised I needed to prioritise my mental health, bottling it up didn't help me at all even though I had my friends in mind. I think if I had opened up earlier then it may not have been as bad. I apologised to my friends to begin with because I felt awful that I needed to sort my mental health out. My sister turned to me and said 'Never apologise for your mental health, it is ok to have anxiety and it is ok to talk about it. We need to be the people who tell the truth about our mental health'
Are you seeking any help for your anxiety? It's a difficult step to make but a very positive one. Please remember that your mental health is important too ?? I am here if you need to chat. (Meditations on YouTube are great to calm me down too!) sending love
britt88262 jade1797
Posted
jade1797 britt88262
Posted
I totally agree, it became normal for me to be the listener but not actually talk about me at all.
Good on you for getting help for this, it's hard but a positive step
keep going x
marleen85993 britt88262
Posted
Hi Britt I think you are trying to be strong for everyone round you however it is time to take care of yourself.l don't talk about my anxiety to anyone in my family and friends circle through choice.I am a very private person and l like to deal with things on my own.Having said that l have no problem talking to doctor's therapists etc.That is their jobs and they meet patients with anxiety and depression on a regular basis.They are trained to deal with our difficulties and trust me we really don't impact their lives.Just seek help don't hesitate and don't over think it.
britt88262 marleen85993
Posted
I agree that it really is time for me to step back and figure my own issues out. I know now from a long talk I had yesterday that I cannot be strong for anyone else If I am weak myself. Putting on a front and pretending can only last so long. Not that I have this terrible life, but anxiety doesn't discriminate that's for sure.
jan34534 britt88262
Posted
It's time for you to take care of You!!
I was just like you and try to be strong on my own so as not a burden others. This went on for many years. I kept everything inside until finally my nervous system literally broke down. I had numerous symptoms of anxiety and stress and I thought I had some terrible disease. In other words, my body was telling me it couldn't take anymore of me bottling up my feelings, anxieties etc.
we must. Take care of ourselves!
Believe me, the counselors don't take on our problems. They enjoy their job and like to help people. They go home and have their own issues to deal with. We are just part of their job . People are not as emotionally fragile as we may think. So take advantage of help when you can get it .
it's time to put yourself first. Not in a selfish way but in a loving way for yourself. We can't help others when we are not healthy .
actually, when you admit to your family that you need help, that is not being a failure that is a success. We cannot receive help unless we first admit that we need help. That is the first step towards healing! Self awareness!
Being aware that you need help and letting someone know is the opposite of being a failure. It shows that you care about yourself and also your family. ??
britt88262 jan34534
Posted
"When you admit to your family that you need help, that is not being a faliure that is success." What a great way to put it and should really be a slogan for mental health all around the world. I often associate my anxiety and depression with somehow failing as a person. I think maybe also because there is such a stimga on it. I also had a friend tell me, "Oh there you go with that anxiety talk again," because I had mentioned that I have had anxiety since I was very young. I thought are you for real?
Nevertheless, thank you for your uplifting message. It is nice to know there are people out there who care and who understand!
jan34534 britt88262
Posted
Great! I'm glad it helped.
it's never a person's own fault when they have anxiety or depression. As a nurse I know that there is a genetic component to anxiety and depression that you can inherit from a parent. Just like you can inherit anything else from a parent.
Keep fighting for yourself because you deserve a beautiful life! 🌸🌸🌸
britt88262 jan34534
Posted
Thank you!! <3
pamela51740 britt88262
Posted
Omg I could of wrote this myself! You have described exactly how I am & feel! I've suffered for 12 years with anxiety and depression and depersonalization. I too am a mam and anxiety and depression runs in my mams side! You feel like you don't want to make a fuss and that were not worth it but we are, I finilly rang for therapy today and a therapist is ringing me back on Wednesday and I don't know what to say! I feel like I'm not worth the time! Please get some help and put yourself first & take care x
britt88262 pamela51740
Posted
You are so worth it, hun. I am so glad to hear that you are going to speak with someone because you are NOT ALONE!!! If you ever need someone to talk to please don't hesitant!