death in family

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I was a full timer carer to my 95 year old mother until she passed away very suddenly in january. i managed to hold it all together and even coped with my chronic daily migraines for the week. On the saturday the day after the funeral migraines have got much worse and severe nausea everyday. My anxiety and depression have also got much worse feel very tired and am not sleeping much at night. I am not due to see my neurologist  until 3rd may. He has said he thinks CGRP will help me but it wont be available in Ireland till 2019. I have tried everything and nothing has helped I have over to london 3 times to see dr peter goadsby. i am 64 years old and also have osteoarthritis in both my knees and feet. has anyone found their migraines and nausea got worse after losing a beloved one. i was very close to my mother. i live with my brother as neither of us are married i would be very thankful for any replies.

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  • Posted

    Hello Joan, I'm so sorry to hear about your Mother. It's not surprising that migraines get so much worse as they feed on stress and anxiety.

    My Dad died on 30th January 2016 after a couple of months in hospital, the day after his funeral I had my first double migraine with both sides going into migraine on the same day. The stress of 'holding it together' just gets to the point where something has to give. Last year in July Mum suddenly died (just went to bed and didn't wake up) which, although I wasn't as close to her as to my Dad, was a shock. My migraines have steadily increased since then. I have rheumatoid arthritis and am now having to help my brother as he has a bad back; eventually I'll move in with him as the house was left to both of us (neither of us married too) and he struggles with everyday things like banking and shopping. Needless to say I know how difficult it is for you at the moment. Try not to put pressure on yourself to appear ok when you're not, there's no set time limit for grieving when you lose someone that close and it's only just happened. In fact when Dad died I was in shock for most of the immediate period and it was 3 months down the line when the grief really hit. Take care and I hope things become easier in time. Anne xx

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    • Posted

      thank you Anne for your reply. I am lucky that i have a very kind brother. He took early retirement to help with my mother. I have being told that i will have good and bad days and my gp said it is only very recent. it is hard to cope with being in pain all the time. i am watching the world migraine summit on my laptop and you can learn quite a few things from it. Joan
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    • Posted

      Hello Joan,

      Thanks so much for mentioning the world migraine summit, I had no idea of it's existence so looked it up and registered straight away. The last 2 days of talks have been really interesting ( too interesting as I sat up late last night watching them and got 4 migraine attacks in 12 hrs as a result!).

      I'm glad you have support, my big sister was a great help to me too.

      Anne xx 🌹

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  • Posted

    Joan I am so sorry for your loss...stress can definately cause migraines, so can lack of sleep, since your Mother has passed I am sure you have changed MANY things, like if you are eating or drinking less, using a phone or computer screen more often, basically changed your whole lifestyle....it may help you in lots of ways to establish a new routine, possibly including socializing through a support group or church(isolating yourself may feel better at first but, it could lead to depression & etc) maybe volunteer or just get outside/fresh air, walking or something low impact, doing things you enjoy...caregivers tend to neglect themselves to focus on others, it is NOT selfish to want to feel better...I have suffered losses as well & struggle with regular Migraines, I have chronic pain from 7 surgeries, multiple procedures, injuries, arthritis(at 53) I at times feel just SO TIRED but, I am trying to do more of what keeps me busy(mentally &physically what I can)...I really feel for you & understand, I hope you can heal your heart...Wishing you strength, comfort & peace💟

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