Decided to die because there’s no reason for me to live

Hi glasshalfempty,

We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologise for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

If you are based outside of the UK.

The Samaritans is a UK based charity, but they also have suggestions for how you can access help in other countries.

Please have a look at this page https://www.befrienders.org/directory

Patient

I am sorry you’re feeling this way. It must be very difficult for you. is there anything specific that led you to this conclusion? I was just wondering if anything happened in your life that may have caused you to feel depression or that there’s no hope.

you don’t need to share that if it’s too private.

you are very Young and have plenty of time to make positive changes in your life.

I have a friend who was in his 40s working minimum wage and feeling very down. Very Depressed actually. there were also some other things going on in his life. he said he felt like a failure. Eventually he ended up going to a career center and started learning about tiling. He now has his own business and is making over $100,000 a year! Never did he ever dream he could do that . he thought he was all washed up. Now he looks back and realizes the time he was really down was just a short snippet in his life. He’s very grateful and feels blessed that he didn’t give up.

Feel free to share anything you would like including how you are feeling, more about how you got to this decision , anything at all. if you ever need to talk to somebody 24 seven here is a phone number that is confidential. If you live in the US call this number and they will talk to you. They also have resources for counseling etc. 800-273-8255.

i know you’re feeling really despondent, but I really encourage you to call that number or speak to a counselor that you may know.

Very often just being able to vent how you feel and getting a fresh perspective on your situation can really help! I talk to a counselor once a week virtually and every time I do I learn something new and I get suggestions that I would not have thought of. There are so many resources out there that you may not even be aware of! there are so many resources out there that you may not even be aware of! Give yourself a chance! You deserve it. We are here for you . ❤

hi glass, i know partly how you feel. i sometimes do reach this point. why? you want to go why? what haven't you achieved and who has told you you must do this, that or the other? what do YOU want from your life if you carried on? what could make you stay? i am 47 and got the feelings like you have after a counseling session to do with rape last year. try to talk to people, keep talking. who would miss you if you went? do people know how awful you feel? have you spoken to anyone else about this? what did they say? poor you. go do something you want. now. oh and keep telling us. i am here all day, as are other people.

Update

I’ve thought it through and dying really is the best option for me in the long run. I’ve picked a reliable method and am certain there is nothing else I or anyone else can do for me.

I intended to be further on in life and to have achieved more by the time my 20s finished but I’m still a failure. There’s no reason to keep living. We put an animal down when there’s no hope of recovery and poor quality of life, so why shouldn’t I do the same?

So that’s that. I’ll get my affairs in order before my next birthday and I can finally stop being a burden and a disappointment to everyone. I know some people will be upset but they have to understand that I’m only doing what’s best for them. They’ll be sad at first but eventually, they’ll see this was a good decision and they’ll be much happier. They might even forget I existed altogether. That’s all I want.

I think 29 is a good age for me to die.

hi ladies, i just can't believe that's what you're contemplating. so sad, i feel so sorry for you both. is there really no other way?

hi glass, i have days when i wonder if i should be alive then other days when i think nobody will tell me what to do and i want to be alive. assault has done this to my mind but if i don't live the people who assaulted me would have won. why should i let them? i think you need to try to understand what is making you feel so terrible, not to anyone, not with anyone but alone. write down why you think living is bad, then write down why living might be good. see which list wins. you might then physically see your answer. people may want you to live for a reason, think about this too. i am no expert but only deal in truth.

so listen to a guy named David Goggins on YouTube. He was going through what you are, he had a horrible childhood, was called every name in the book, depressed, etc. he had every reason to not want to be here, but he decided that it didn’t matter what anybody else thought of him, he was not going to give up. His talks are awesome.

are you still out there?

I am in similar situation. But because my naitivity and stupidity. Everywhere I am kind and polite person like me are used. In many ways. Because of many problems I also do not have another choice. I am tired and sick of it. Sad and hopeless future in front of me. Better simply go away from this sad and cruel world.

to all those on here who wanted to not be here, i don't if you are but if so what changed? if you are still contemplating not being here then let me ask you this - have you made a plan as to what to do? i can't live your lives for you but can say this, if you make a list and the reasons for living outweigh the reasons for dying then is this really what you want. that's all.