Deep sadness

There is a reason. I dont know it for you but there is a reason.this isnt known exactly by science yet. And sometimes enviornment causes it or worsens it as well. This is why therapy is needed. Even if it is some gentic thing therapy can at least guide you to work thru some stuff and if its chemical someone needs to find the right mix to help you. Thats the prudent  way. Reality is  try different meds and hooe one works. Thats all they have a vailable.. People around you get drained over time, some are nasty and some are supportive. You need you the most out of everyone and everything that much im positive. This is a fear based world now. The media is always discussing the worst or what ifs and insulting and degrading someone, ot used to be the news. In between shows are medical ads. We arent doctors we dont need medical ads. The view  is be your own dr. Then they flood you with more google garbage and falso info and articles that the human mind cant even grasp all at ince. So you end uo anxious. Busy being brainwashed that everyine and everything is your buisness. It isnt. Truth is we are animals a oart of nature and suppose to exist in our own little space and time and journey thru life..before the interent and full blown coverage of everyine everywhere thats how people existed and were mentally healthier as a result. Not all there has always been issues about but it wasnt epidemic like it is now.d science is in its infancy. Mris first became public in 1977 so how much can a human learn so fast.  So are you depressed for no reason? No you have a reason.

now anxiety that we all have is not the anxiety a normal person has. Know that now. The label is wrong. What ever this anxiety is is a malfunction in the fight or flight part of the brain that sends out danger and fear to all the receptors in your body. And the bidy has memory too. So you end uo frazzled and filled with fear. In fear its hard to make rationale decisions or self calm or be happy. The chemicals dont allow the hapoy chemicals to take hild. Fear is out survival method. No one in danger, real danger feels wonderful and is thinking about going on a trip, or making any changes. Thats what fear does.

is there a way out. Surely yes there is. Many have done it. Some havent and most manage it. If tou need medicine then you do a professional would have to figure out what can or will work but understand there choices are only from what has been approved and invented. It seems by nature it is not universal. So it becomes trial and error with whats available.

since money pays the bills and sometimes jobs are not available yes sometimes you have to make do until something more enlightening comes along. He answer there is find things that make you happy outside your job, and when something comes up you go apply for it or move to an area where that job is available. That would require a lot of change.

my theory is theraoy. A psychiatrist to assess you and a therapist to work woth you to help you help yourself. Theres all kinds of therapy out there. Then aside from that learn. You have the whole web at your fingertips here. Pinterest i think is simple and easy enough search anxiety and click remidies. Same with depression, see the ideas out there. Same with utube, mediations of all sorts, different cultures and how they handle ot, yoga, breathing, mindful..whatever resinates with you. They even have retreats availabke and couses on cbt, dbt , anxiety, changing..etc. there is a massive amount of committment that has to go into all this and a lot of ooen mindness and the committment to change how you think, behave and respond. Its a slow process with ups and doen. Theres no mistakes. What doesnt work for you doesnt, then you go ine to some thing else. It has to resonate with you.

there are no mistakes in this life. Learning experiences only.You take it from this moment and go forward. Theres no redo button. You dont even need one either.thank fully babies and toddlers and children are allowed to make mistakes what a mess everything would be but yet adults are so harsh in themselves and ban mistakes? Imagine when a toddler learns to walk and fell down..what you say to the toddler with your current mindet? Get uo you little dummy you are a failure why did you let yourself fall down? Thats what you are doing to yourself so you know. 

Thats all i got. I have no clue if that helps you or not. I hope it did a little. Dont be hard on youself and get you need you.

Yes anxiety and depression go hand in hand. Usually you start with one and over time it progresses to the other. With me it's been a constant battle with anxiety to the point that it severely affected my life. And over time I became very depressed. I find that the life I had no longer existed. I isolated myself from friends and family. Medication can be tricky. I've been on just about all of them. But I currently take 150mg of Effexor and Xanax XR once daily, it seems to have eased my anxiety. My depression fluctuates between bad days and not so bad. See if your doctor can try a different med, they all have different side effects. And it takes time for the meds to start working. They have to build up in your system. Best of luck to you. You are not alone.