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ive been having what i think are delusions i think i’m best friends with my best friend, and good friends with a lot of people, but they don’t seem to like me as much as i do them? so i get delusions they hate me and leave me out on purpose and want to hurt me and consciously try to hurt my feelings. and i get those delusions w family too, and even teachers, thinking they hate me because i was late or something. it’s been a real big problem with a few friendships in particular, for years with me “best friend” bc i always feel i’m not good enough and she treats me differently from her other friends, even ones she just met she favors, though in the moment i believe my delusions but a few hours after i realize i’m probably not right, but they reoccur and cause fights. i didn’t give thought that it might all be in my head for a long time, but everyone isn’t wrong, it’s probably me. it causes a lot of sadness, loneliness, anger, hopelessness, and feeling left out and not good enough. i wouldn’t know how to bring it up w my psychiatrist, bc i feel like if i say i think i have delusions he will think i’m self diagnosing and obviously sting, or that i don’t have them bc i eventually see that it’s not reality
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