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Depersonalization/Derealization is making life unbearable

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lele22410
lele22410

I need help or some encouraging words and people on these forums are amazing at that. A few months ago I smoked weed and had the worst panic attack of my life which is weird because it wasn't the first time I smoked, I thought I was going to die. The attack lasted about 3 hours and I felt fine until about a week later I was in the shower and had another panic attack but it was minor, the thing that scared me was the feeling afterwards. I was shocked and scared because I felt completely out of touch, I was foggy, tired, confused and scared. I have suffered from anxiety but this was so different, I have come to the conclusion depersonalization was triggered by smoking sad I had this feeling for about two weeks straight and got put on citlopram which had terrible side effects but have started to settle, 2 months later and today had a depersonalization attack! I was fine in a supermarket and out of no where I'm frightened and think my body is numb but can feel it, I'm in a daze and confused! I have no motivation and I can't do anything. I'm so scared. I don't want to be alive but I don't want to die either. This feeling isn't me, why did this happen? What can I do to be occupied? Is this anxiety or is there something wrong with my brain? My doctor put it down to anxiety but is worried about me sad I'm a mess.

0 likes, 8 replies

8 Replies

  • toshia_26860
    toshia_26860 lele22410

    Posted

    I think anybody that has bad anxiety has exsperinced this.. I had a bad phase of that too. Then I just kelp expecting it to happen and it did. So I finally got fed up with my anxiety and went and saw my doc who referred me to a pchycirsit and long story short was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. So they put me on Celexa and Xanax and the meds have helped a lot.
  • joe_04369
    joe_04369 lele22410

    Posted

    Helllo Lele,

    Oh I know that felling that life is so unreal like I'm in a daze and it won't go away and I am scared and feel insane, what's is wrong with me, am I crazy? The answer is NO, your brain is just short circuiting, you are having very strong anxiety and depression at the same time and your Citalopram is not working, after one month you should be past the side effects and you should be feeling better, are you seeing a Dr or a Psychiatrist? Let me know OK.

    Joe  

    • lele22410
      lele22410 joe_04369

      Posted

      Thank you very much for your reply. I'm just seeing a doctor right now and she is telling me I'm anxious and depressed, which I am and I guess these meds aren't helping. It sucks because I thought I was getting better but it is hitting hard again! Ugh </3 I was seeing a therapist but he made me feel worse.

    • joe_04369
      joe_04369 lele22410

      Posted

      Hello, I am awake and still posting!! OK listen to me, first get a new DR. Per your post  " My doctor put it down to anxiety but is worried about me" that's not what you want to hear from a DR, they are there to get you help not tell you they are worried about you! Next, I'm not sure where you live but in the US, a therapist can not prescribed medication,you have to see a psychiatrist and be evaluated by a professinal, your DR should have told you that and recommended one for you for Gods sake. Today, find a psychiatrist and make an appointment, tell them this is urgent and you need help ASAP. When you see the psychiatrist, tell her/him everything you are feeling, do not hold back, they need to know your Medical history,what Meds you are on (citalopram) what dose(Bring the botttle they like that). Let them evaluate you and they will give you some Meds to start with. Make sure to get some benzodiazepines(Xanax)I'm sure they will under your condition and it will help you calm down in 30 minutes or less.Now the tough part, finding the right antidepressant which you already know because the citalopram did not work. There are 40 plus different  antidepressants on the market and it took me 7 or so to find the right one to work,they all have side effects so you have to ride it out for a few weeks. If the side effects are making you worse after a few weeks, call your Psych and they willl try someting else,, I know I called mine many times and this is normal, you are paying them so if you need help call!

      Good luck again and keep us updated, you will get better I promise.

      Joe

    • lele22410
      lele22410 joe_04369

      Posted

      I talked to a doctor lady today! I told her everything and she also agreed said 6 weeks is too long to still feel bad and that she wants me to start on sertraline if I'm upto it. She also told me that citlopram is actually funded by the government here that's usually why they start us off on it first! She understood me and was very kind so I'm happy about that and feeling a little better about the situation smile x

    • joe_04369
      joe_04369 lele22410

      Posted

      Great news Lele I'm so happy for you, sertraline is very popular(Zoloft)

      and start taking it so your body adjusts to it. You are on your way, update us still OK. God Bless!

      Joe

       

  • Howll
    Howll lele22410

    Posted

    I can relate to this, iv always suffered anxiety but it was always manageable. One night last year I got real drunk then decided to smoke weed. Since then nothings been the same, I'm constantly in a state of anxiety, I worry about everything, I always feel spaced out and out of touch and worry that this is the end. I don't like travelling alone in fear of something bad happening.

    I have gotten better, but I've not taken meds, I try to practice mindfulness on a daily basis and it really does help, I practise breathing techniques too.

    Nobody believes me that it was the weed that triggered this but it's too much of a coincidence. On the night I smoked it I had a massive panic attack and it went downhill from there.

  • alex0820
    alex0820 lele22410

    Posted

    It is very normal to feel depersonalization/derealization on and off during anxiety. Your senses are heightened and its overall a very fearful experience feeling like you are numb or watching yourself outside of your body with no control. My first anxiety attack I experienced this and it was very, very scary. Probably the most scary symptom.

    If your testing is coming back normal, this symptom can boil down to your anxiety. Take a few moments to sit and breathe and tell yourself that this is only s symptom. That it will pass, because they always do.

    Something that helped was coloring for me (childish lol) or playing s game on my phone to distract myself. Before you know it, the feeling subsides.

    Hope you feel better!

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