Depressed partner broke up with me, What should I do?
Posted , 6 users are following.
I have been dating this guy for a short time (6 months) and I had never been so happy. He had invited me over to family events, we never fight, I really like him. Recently, one day he just didn't talk to me all day then the next day he sends me a text messgae and breaks up with me. Tells me he is depressed and needs time alone to sort himself out and to get back on his medication. I was very confused because I didn't know he suffers from mental illness but I did a ton of research and I was very understanding and told him I support him and I am here for him when he needs me. Since, he told me he is depressed because he is still in love with his ex girlfriend (who cheated on him and wasnt kind) but then he flipped out on me and accused me of sleeping with other people because I didn't talk to him for a day? Is this normal behavior? I am not sure what to do.. should I stick around and give him his space? Or, leave the relationship entirely? I'm not sure if he is actually in love with his ex or if he was saying that because he wanted me to leave him alone? Or, does a depressed person go back to people who treated them poorly and don't think they deserve love? I am so confused and any input would be helpful.
3 likes, 6 replies
dee53012 samk192
Posted
LEAVE AND DON'T LOOK BACK!
Just because a person has a mental illness it does not give them the right to accuse you of things; don't tolerate it! I am sorry you have gone through this, but you will be glad you didn't stick around. Accusations like that are abusive control tactics, not mental illness. Maybe the girl he still loves is not the bad guy, maybe he is full of it and accused her to cheating too. HE is the one treating others poorly. Maybe you could have a chat with the ex gf.
borderriever samk192
Posted
It is difficult to know what baggage he is carrying around from His last relationship and what is the route problems of His condition are.
Depressives sometimes will have been hurt in the past and sexual relationship may have been broken up because of unfaithfulness on several occasions. or other more distant problems
. You can stay and try to address His concerns. You need to know the reasons of His dpression and work with Him.If you feel you are not able to to address his concerns as the problem could go on throughout the relationship you are best to go.
The problem with staying with Him you need to be firm and kind. and He may have a reoccurence. Talk to him and see if you can reassure him
BOB
anon85986 samk192
Posted
Hmm this is a tough one.
My gut feeling is for you to walk away and don't look back. I think everyone has tried to change people or themselves to make a relationship work and it is really really difficult to do that most times impossible.
It bothers me that he suddenly just clicks off of you and is done. The past is a great indicator of the future, there is no reason to believe that if you were to get back together that he would do this again and again. Your life would be in constant state of anxiety. I dated someone with a passive agressive disorder- which is almost 100% untreatable and wasted a year of my life trying to fix the unfixable
dee53012 anon85986
Posted
hazel60998 samk192
Posted
sashagirl samk192
Posted
You can't help him. I am sorry for the hurt and confusion you are experiencing. MOVE ON with your life NOW!!!