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Depression - guilt over relationship

Posted , 8 users are following.

jason15970
jason15970

Hi all, I hope you are well. I've struggled badly with depression for the last 15 months, 6 of which I was absent from work due to it though I have been back since March and not missed a day.

For me, the root seems to be a relationship problem - I feel terrible guilt that I do not love my 'girlfriend' in the way I once did, I see it more as friendship now, but even then, I find it so hard to talk to her as I feel shame and guilt, as she has invested so much love and time in wanting to get me better. It took me about 4 months into the depression, though, to admit the problem, as I wanted it to be 'something else' and not my change of feelings to her.

I am struggling really badly with the guilt, but despite me being so honest with her now about things, she keeps saying spending time together and 'trying to work through it' will help. I'm at my wits end, I'm 38 and feel like this was my last chance for happiness. I just don't know what else to do.

1 like, 18 replies

18 Replies

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  • inna88111
    inna88111 jason15970

    Posted

    Hi. Tell her the truth. She deserving it and you too. Better terrible end than terrible without end. And if you feel like this was your last chance for happiness, are you happy? No one knows what it to come. But you will never find out if you stay.

    But just to be fair, I am marred for 15 Years. And every relationship is changing with the time. No need to feel guilty about. Friendship is a better one of 2 possible ways. Another one is to feel nothing or hate. Sometimes it  is more important to be with someone you trust, than to be in love. Being thankfull to someone for taking care of you is just another shape of love. You can repay her with taking care of her. And shi will feel your love. Becouse this is how long term relationships works. Appreciate each other. 

    • jason15970
      jason15970 inna88111

      Posted

      Hi inna, many thanks for your words, and sorry for taking so long to respond! I am still very much in a state of feeling 'stuck', sadly, but trying hard each way - any more advice is welcome!

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