depression,,is there a cure

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if this is too much,,then please delete it,,,,ive read various pieces on here about people saying they fought through depression and won,,,,well good im very pleased,,,but each and every case of depression is different,, medication of one type sometimes helps one and not another. People write books on how *they* cured there version of depression ,,but thats how* they *over came it,,, not necessarily will it help others. A very poor example of this is ,,,go for a walk each day,,,im sure some people find this very helpful,,, but,i dont,,,, im frightened to go out the house( i do,,when its needed,,once a week) why,,,,because im frightened,,,, and to leave the house takes blood sweat n tears and im glad to get back in again,,,,why,,,,is imertarial because,,not a tablet or cognitive therapy ,counselling or anything else can cure it... ive lived in iteland for 9 years,,,, friends none,,, couldnt make a friend in the real world if my life depended on it,,,, that goes right back to when i was at school. .. fighting this is bad enough but fighting it alone is worse,,, thank you to the many people who commented on my last post,, 

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  • Posted

    Hi david. Ive just written a long post too ive had enough xx everyone is different and its a roulette as to wat works for who. Xx not at my best to give u any meaningful advice hun. Im just so anxious and pacing but wanted u to know someones thinkin about u xx
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  • Posted

    Hi David,

    The best thing I can suggest is for you go make an appointment with you GP and discuss with him/her what is going on with you.  Make a list if it helps, or even take someone with you for support. 

    I don't think that there is any magic, one stop, cure all thing that will make everything better, however, that said, if medication helps then what is wrong with taking it?  Even if it is not a long term solution, it might help you get over a few hurdles that you are facing at the moment.  

    Counselling - well, there is different types, it might have been what you had in the past was not suitable, that doesn't mean that it is wrong and that all forms of counselling are bad.  Again, this is something that you can discuss with your GP.  They should be able to talk to you about the services in your area that could be of benefit to you.

    In terms of making friends, my advice will be to have a look and see if there are any groups that interest you in your area that you could join.  If you like reading, pop into your local library and see if there is a reading group?  Could you maybe consider a night class at a local school or college?  That is a great way of meeting people, esp if it is a sunject that you are interested in.  

    The prospect of going out can feel daunting, however, if you know where you are going, plan your route, explain any anxieties to the tutor, you might find that you can actually do this.

    Years of experience have got me to this point.  I was thrown out of home, managed to get a place in a different area to where I grew up.  I had no friends close by and limited family support.  I also had no job at the time.  I signed up to two night classes and from there I met people, then I met their friends, and some 20 years laters we still have our friendship.  The night classes also helped me to get a job and I have continued to study (mainly night classes) for several years. Two of my best friends I met through a college course.

    Whilst reading your post, the one thing that really struck me, was your comment about "fighting it alone" - the fact that you are still fighting is a credit to your resolve of character.  Don't give up!  The old saying with life gives you lemons, make lemonade!  When now is your opportunity!

    Good luck x

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    • Posted

      i need to be careful here,,,ok,,,,as for joining a group,,even the word group scares me,,, im feared of people,,groups,,one to one fine,, not groups,,,i know why this is,,,nothing can help ,,nothing,,get someone to go to drs with me,,,i have no one ,not a soul.making friends is alien to me,,, i just wasnt born with that ability,,
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    • Posted

      You might just surprise yourself!

      At times we all have to do things that are outside of our comfort zone.

      Do you have a care worker? Maybe they could help you out?

      There may even be a befriending service in your area?

      One step at a time, take things slowly. Nothing will change for you unless you decide to do something about.

      The best place to start is with your GP.

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    • Posted

      let me give you an incite into comfort zone,,,the more you do something ,the easier it gets right?,,,,,well no actually its wrong,,, for me,.Each week i pay rent ,next door,not 20 yards away,for 3 and a half years ive done this ,thats about170 plus times,,does it gey easier,,nope,,, i derad saturdays .....why,,, ile tell you why,, because when i knock on the door,,,,i dont know how many people are in there,,could be 1,,could be 10,,,,, in other words its a nightmare,,same with going into a shop,post office,,anywhere and it never gets easier,,never,,,so each week it never changes,,,to leave the house is a nightmare,to go anywhere is fraught with anxiety and worry,, where most ppl walk down the street like its routine,, not to me,,, nothing is routine,,,nothing
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    • Posted

      Well then you need to speak to your GP for help and support, as clearly the suggestions are not what you want to hear. Everyone goes through difficult times. If you chose not to do anything (or try) then nothing will change. The alternative is that you carry on exactly as you without complaining.
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    • Posted

      i wasnt looking for suggestions,,thats not what my post was about,,,,,but,,as you ask ,,,whatever i choose to do,,,be it medication,,councelling or anything else,,,,, nor was i complaining,,i simply answered your question,,but i will refrain from writing,, thank you,,, but the  fact is none of the above,,nor any other things im aware of,,,cure ugliness,,,,,,,none,,,and being ugly,,in  this world ,doesnt work,,, 
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  • Posted

    Hi David,

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. You are never alone on this forum, you are amongst friends who can identify with you.

    I was at my very lowest roughly 1.5 years ago, and have since tried all I can think of to try and get myself "back up on that horse". (Not taking meds though, that is not for me). Doing quite well these days. I have made so many changes in my everyday life since I acknowledged that my depression and anxiety was partially triggered by work/career stress and expectations, and also due to multiple suicides in the family. I have done my best to make peace with the family-bit, and realised I cannot control what has happened. I can however control my work and career choice and am currently happily in between jobs. Doing some soul searching on what job is right for me. Last job was very destructive, and I dont want to send myself right back to that dark hole. For me, the greatest journey has been to really think and identify what the real reasons are behind my anxiety/depression. Then try to change what I can change, and try to accept what I cannot control. Taking walks are lovely when the sun is out, but it is not my main point of recovery at all. "Eat right and exercise" sounds good to say and is an easy advice for people to give, but as perhaps many of us on this forum can agree on, it is not as easy as that. My mind is luckily starting to find peace. I have allowed myself to rest from that toxic workplace and I am feeling hopeful on what the future brings. I also went to the store today and am happy to have been out for a little bit and am now tucked in my cosy blanket on the sofa.

    Are there any changes you feel you could potentially make for yourself to try and add a bit more peace to your mind?

    I'm here if you need to talk,

    Jen

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  • Posted

    Hi David.

    I can relate to your post. From school days I found it hard to make friends. I still don't have any.

    I've tried but they're busy with there own life's. Same as my family. I live in a lonely world.

    No partner .

    It drives me insane makes me more depressed.

    I don't believe there's a cure for depression I believe we just go through periods of good days.

    I hate leaving the house it makes me sick but I do it as I'm bringing a child up on my own now and need to work.

    My daughter will be 16 next birthday and doesn't need me as much.

    Not sure how I will continue. It's so hard.

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