Depression recovery. My personal ongoing success story.

Posted , 4 users are following.

In 2012 depression hit me out of the blue. At first I thought it was a physical problem but the discovered I had anxiety and depression. For the first year I looked to other people and medication to solve my problems. After three months on 20mg Citalopram my symptoms subsided. Until May 2012 I had no symptoms, then the depression started coming back.

I was worried to the point of crying every morning, had trouble concentrating at work, and was emotionally turned off everyday. The main problem I had in trying to recover was ruminating. I always worried that my problems will come back the next day. This caused me problems sleeping and put me in the mind set that everyday was the same and each day seemed useless.

I refused to go on higher medication and started looking at my daily habits and discover what habits had wired my brain into depression.  Here are a few I discovered:

-Always thinking the worst

-Always planning my days and weekends and living for the next planned event...not enjoying the present.

-I was not participating in my own daily life...expressing my opinion and conversations with others.

-Grew up not socializing with friends and living in a world of movies and books.

-Always working as fast as possible to get the most work done instead of slowing down, enjoying and doing better quality work.

These are just a few of my discoveries about myself that I decided needed to change. I needed to rewire my brain to healthier habits since I was tired of living a miserable daily life. Medication is just a patch; the true reasons need to be uncovered and dealt with.

Please take my experiences to heart to help you. Some depression may need medication but I offer my story here as a possible assistant to help you recover.  Keep in mind that this isn't easy and takes months but in the end you will feel much better as I do.

If you need any advice please post to this discussion. Please keep in mind I am not a doctor, just an everyday guy making my life better one day at a time.

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    How old are you Mathew. I am so parallized with fear that I cannot take care of myself. I have been locked in my room for three months, because I am so scared to face people. All aspects of my life are getting so messed but I am not able to take a bold step to break out of the rut.
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    • Posted

      Hi rolika,your predicament sounds awful but I needed to respond to your post as I have been where you are now? I stayed in my room for such a long time, paralysed with fear and dreading everyday. All I can say is it WILL get better. I know at the moment a day May seem like a week and a week like a month, the worry of the unknown is a scary thing and fear to face people is not that uncommon. I,m just glad you found this site as you can communicate with people from the safety of your room therefore you are not entirely alone and as I have said, sometimes a chat online with people you don't know can sometimes be alot easier than it is to talk to a friend or relative. People on this forum will support you and all will wish you well, just be strong, things WILL get better.
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  • Posted

    Hi Matthew ! Your story is so inspiring and encouraging . I totally relate to dreading that things will never get better - that my illness wont go away . Even , and sometimes more so during easier periods this fear cripples me - I dread the next anticipated dip . I long to be totally free . I find it very difficult to accept the concept that learning to manage my symptoms equals recovery . 


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  • Posted

    Hi Matthew, your words are very inspiring, I can relate to what you say as I have suffered many of the same things you mention. I,m sure your words will help others and I hope you contribute more to this forum. Thank you for posting.
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