Detached from reality

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So i joined this forum in order to learn more about and hopefully help my sister.

Shes 24 yrs old and since middle school has suffered from BDD (body dismorphia). It started back in middle school when her "friends", in order to gain status, bullied her. It was really bad, they would spit in her food and tourment her. It affected her really badly and still to this day she lives with those scars. I feel my parent's divorce when we were younger also played a factor in her mental illnesses.

To make a long story short, because of her illnesses which include BDD as i said, depression, anxiety, and OCD, it has hindered her ability to be independent. She still lives w my mother, has never worked a day in her life, is constantly in therapy, takes medications like you wouldnt believe, yet although she has gotten better, shes still nowhere close to being fully independent. I talked with her last night because she goes through these "crisis" where she completely shuts everyone and everything out and becomes very angry and just cries in desperstiom of her situation. I know she wants to get better, to be happy, but its almost like shes stuck and doesnt know how to get out.

She began to talk about how shes a nihilist and that really concerned me. I started to see just how deep her depression was. She said nothing in this REALITY will ever satisfy her. She said people think they are free but they aren't and theyre only fooling themselves. She talked about how she doesnt understand how people can be so evil in their intensions, said that people dont care. She has no interest in socializing herself, shed rather be alone because its not as bad as people make it to be.

What i took from everything she said was that she has detached from reality and she almost has lost the abiliy to love and be loved.

Im not sure what to say or how else to help her. My mother, especially, and i have been trying to help her for almost 10 yrs now and she seems to be sinking deeper and deeper into this blackhole. If anyone has any piece of advice, it would be greatly appreciated.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    i think she needs some serious therepy,she needs to talk to some1 she dosent know and get it all out ,think by the sounds of it shes in a bad way,dont think the meds shes on are not helping either so she needs to discuss them as well,
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    • Posted

      Shes been going to therapy, has had several therapist, has been put through cognitive therapy, has even been in in-patient hospitals. We've had to call the cops several times because shes in hysteria. Ontop of all these things, i feel the things she researches online play a role in her way of thinking. Shes a VERY deep thinker. Believes in a lot of conspiracy theories. She talks a lot about the mind, body and spirit and how we arent originally from this reality. Shes extremely smart bc she reads a lot but i feel shes too smary for her own good if that makes sense. I dont want to believe shes hopeless but im starting too.

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  • Posted

    Family counseling or group counseling might be helpful for your sister. Have real conversation s with her where you share in her interests. Find a common ground where you participate in what she interested as a friend. Shop for music. Eat favorite foods together, find discussion points to agree on. Be her friend
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  • Posted

    It's likely she was always a deep thinker and a sensitive person, this is why she was wounded so deeply too, where others in similar situations may have bounced back a bit more, who knows. But she's still young and finding her way and maybe it's just a case of accepting where she is in her life at present. Wounds can take a long time to heal [if ever] and in terms of her belief systems, well, we all have beliefs really so don't worry about that. In a way she's been disabled, debilitated, and if she ever does manage to stand on her own two feet then that will be a blessing.Just continue to encourage her with her therapy's etc., and good on you for being a very loving sister. All the best.

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  • Posted

    Tell her that the best revenge for the people that bullied her is to rise above them and let them see that she is strong and happy. If she pretends for long enough, she will rewire the neurons in her brain and actually start to feel better. Good luck. She's very lucky to have a caring sister like you.

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  • Posted

    Hi Jas - I'm so sorry to read of your dilemma. It sounds so insurmountable. I wonder if your sister would be amenable to a stay in a psychiatric hospital whjere she can be assessed and observed on a daily basis? They might have some sort of answer to the situation - whether shock therapy or something else. I also wonder whether she likes writing? Perhaps she may find some focus and purpose by writing her ideas about conspiracies, with a view to completing a book on the subject? If countless meds and therapies have had not real result, perhaps the matter should be taken out of her control - i.e. sectioning in a psychiatric environment. It sounds awful, but what is there left to do? I can't imagine the helplessness you must be feeling. 

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