difficulty choosing contraception method, been thinking about the copper coil, help please?!

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so I have been researching and researching so much about different contraception methods that I am really starting to worry and stress myself out and tbh it is getting me really down now! I realise now that I should of been inquiring about it long ago! well here is the story! might seem like a strange one to some of you but anyway..I am in a long distance relationship and my boyfriend is coming over to meet me for the very first time on the 14th of July! I am so excited but this whole contraception thing is really getting me down and ruining the whole thing for me! basically I am just soo confused about what to do! since I am in a ldr and wont be seeing my bf I just wanted a method that would be quick and easy and I also wanted a non hormonal method as I really dont want my moods and periods messed up and I certainly dont want to be a crazy, grumpy, wild woman for the first time meeting him! haha so I was thinking about just going for a diaphragm I know that isn't such a common method nowadays but I thought it would suit me as it is non hormal and wont interupt my periods or anything like that and it is good as it can easily just be removed when I no longer need it! I do also know that it isnt the most effective method but me and my partner will be using condoms also! so anyway to cut a long story short I finally got an appointment to see about the diaphragm on the 4th of july! but I do know that it isnt suitable for everyone cause of unusual shaped vagina and things like that and just knowing my luck that would happen me! so I am a little scared that it wont work out and by that time it will be too late to go on anything else! so I also made an appointment for my GP on Monday (the 1st) to discuss methods (just incase as a back up plan!)..I really really do not want to go on the pill as I have mentioned before about the hormones! I have also been on forums where people have said they have had awful out breaks of cold sores on it because of the hormone changes! and I have had cold sores only about twice before! (i have no idea how I get them but thats a whole other thing!) sad haha so anyway! THAT IS THE LAST THING I WANT! I definitely do not want to break out on one of them! how horrible and embarrassing! and I wouldnt be able to kiss him! that would definitely be the worst scenario! so really I am avoiding the pill at all costs! 

anyway basically I have researched and researched EVERY possible method of contraception and just when I have thought I have found the perfect one I read something terrible that puts me completely off! however I have just came to the conclusion that every one is different and that there is going to be good and bad stories and advantages and disadvantages of every method! so really I am best to just for whatever one I feel most comfortable! 

so anyway it wasnt until today really that I started to consider the copper coil! I dont want to go for the hormonal one however my problem with the coil is the bleeding..I dont want something that will make my periods irregular or mess up my cycle,,but as far as I know periods come normally? I am aware that bleeding is alot longer and heavier with the copper coil but I am sure I can survive with that! and he won't be here when I have my period anyway so thats not so bad! the only thing I am worried about is bleeding once i get it in and having continuous bleeding? I have heard a few people write about this..so I just want to know has anyone else experienced this? is bleeding in between periods common? I really do not want that because ofcourse it is his first time meeting me and I want our sex to be enjoyable and nice for the first time ofcourse! the last thing I want is to start bleeding in the middle of it and blood go everywhere! and then for me to feel uneasy and worried about bleeding every other time we have sex! sad like ugh how horrible! I want to make it memorable NOT FOR BAD REASONS! haha sad I really don't want to gross him out and turn him off sad so really I would just like some general opinions on the whole copper coil thing and about any problems with bleeding/spotting between periods or after having it fitted! I could cope with a little bit of light spotting..but if it is heavy bleeding that is a no no! that would be horrible and like I said I dont want that to happen and ruin our sex and to completely put him off! sad but if the diaphragm was suitable for me I might just go ahead and get it AND the coil if that is possible? could they both be used in conjuction? I dont think they would interfere with eachother as the coil is in the uterus and the diaphragm the cervix? so I would wear the diaphragm as if I did have bleeding that would stop it from leaking through so that would be perfect! and also not much need for condoms! (although will probably still use to protect against sti's although I am pretty sure he is clean but just to be on the safe side! ) haha I know there are a lot of questions to answer here! sorry about that! but any help would be greatly appreciated! and asap also please! any opinions are appreciated! thank you so much! and I am so sorry about such a lengthy post! just had quite a lot to get through! 

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  • Posted

    I have the copper coil and had some spotting when it was first put in - for a few days and then this stopped until I had my period. Which was longer (9 days) but I took vitamin E which made it lighter and not as painful. I had some issues with it at first - some pain, but this was fine after a few weeks. I'd say if you are using condoms anyway, wait until he has been and then get this after when you have some time to let it settle? Everyone is different though - you may be completely fine from the start. I'm sure whatever you choose he won't mind - if he is with you then he isn't going to be put off by something out of your control smile 

    Hope this helps

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      yea this is exactly why I said I knew I should have considered all this earlier! it was just like the last thing I was thinking about! but if I had the diaphragm in also it would stop the bleeding? but I guess I cant wear it all the time..and yea bleeding is the last thing I want..you are right it will just make me feel uncomfortable and will ruin my mood and things..and I think my mind will constantly be on it worrying about it..so yea.. [rolleyes]  and the pain also as you said.. ugh that sucks..hmm I have no idea now..and cat51 I need some other method to use now instead of just condoms..just condoms is not an option..my biggest fear is getting pregnant tbh haha so I guess if the diapghragm is suitable it and condoms will just have to do..but it isnt the most effective method..that is why I wanted a back up to be extra careful  [rolleyes]  and Sarah I really really do not want to go on the pill..it isnt even so much about the hormones as you are right..they probably won't kick in...but it is the whole cold sore thing..people were saying they had terrible out breaks right away! and had like 3 outbreaks in one month! just terrible! no way! that is absolutely the last thing I want! a risk I am not willing to take!  [sad]  damn I am all out of options..haha so I guess the hormonal coil would just be the same with the spotting and stuff? I know it is supposed to lighten periods but I guess the bleeding/spotting, would probably still be the same after just getting it fitted?  [rolleyes]  but thank you so much both of you for your help! I really appreciate it! 
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  • Posted

    I got the copper coil about 2 and a half weeks now, I choose it because hormonal pills were making emcrazy! I wouldn't put your hopes on being able to have sex for about a month after you've had it placed: you will be spotting, bloated and in pain (dont want to out you off!) And sex will be the last thing on your mind. I spotted for about 3 days then had a peroper period 3 days after that lasted 8 days. So if your considering the coil get it a month or so before you first meet him, just to make sure your done spotting, no one can say when you'll get your first proper period though. You could go on the pill? If only for a few weeks while your seeing him as some work straight away and you wont go insane and crazy woman on him as it will be early days. It takes a few years for most people to get thenasty side effects from using hormone pills. Maybe get the coil after you've seen him and you know it'll be a few months before your next encounter?
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      yea this is exactly why I said I knew I should have considered all this earlier! it was just like the last thing I was thinking about! but if I had the diaphragm in also it would stop the bleeding? but I guess I cant wear it all the time..and yea bleeding is the last thing I want..you are right it will just make me feel uncomfortable and will ruin my mood and things..and I think my mind will constantly be on it worrying about it..so yea.. [rolleyes]  and the pain also as you said.. ugh that sucks..hmm I have no idea now..and cat51 I need some other method to use now instead of just condoms..just condoms is not an option..my biggest fear is getting pregnant tbh haha so I guess if the diapghragm is suitable it and condoms will just have to do..but it isnt the most effective method..that is why I wanted a back up to be extra careful  [rolleyes]  and Sarah I really really do not want to go on the pill..it isnt even so much about the hormones as you are right..they probably won't kick in...but it is the whole cold sore thing..people were saying they had terrible out breaks right away! and had like 3 outbreaks in one month! just terrible! no way! that is absolutely the last thing I want! a risk I am not willing to take!  [sad]  damn I am all out of options..haha so I guess the hormonal coil would just be the same with the spotting and stuff? I know it is supposed to lighten periods but I guess the bleeding/spotting, would probably still be the same after just getting it fitted?  [rolleyes]  but thank you so much both of you for your help! I really appreciate it! 
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    yea this is exactly why I said I knew I should have considered all this earlier! it was just like the last thing I was thinking about! but if I had the diaphragm in also it would stop the bleeding? but I guess I cant wear it all the time..and yea bleeding is the last thing I want..you are right it will just make me feel uncomfortable and will ruin my mood and things..and I think my mind will constantly be on it worrying about it..so yea..rolleyes and the pain also as you said.. ugh that sucks..hmm I have no idea now..and cat51 I need some other method to use now instead of just condoms..just condoms is not an option..my biggest fear is getting pregnant tbh haha so I guess if the diapghragm is suitable it and condoms will just have to do..but it isnt the most effective method..that is why I wanted a back up to be extra careful rolleyes and Sarah I really really do not want to go on the pill..it isnt even so much about the hormones as you are right..they probably won't kick in...but it is the whole cold sore thing..people were saying they had terrible out breaks right away! and had like 3 outbreaks in one month! just terrible! no way! that is absolutely the last thing I want! a risk I am not willing to take! sad damn I am all out of options..haha so I guess the hormonal coil would just be the same with the spotting and stuff? I know it is supposed to lighten periods but I guess the bleeding/spotting, would probably still be the same after just getting it fitted? rolleyes but thank you so much both of you for your help! I really appreciate it! 
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  • Posted

    Ive never heard of getting cold sores from taking the pill, maybe talk to your doctor about it? And just take loads of vitamins and stuff to keep them at bay. Im not sure what else you could do, the diaphragmis supposed to work really well if you coat it in spermicidal lubricant, because then even if any little swimmers get that far the lubricant would kill them, you could work out whether or not you'll be ovulating that week as well, to put your mind more at ease smile
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      yea unfortunately I will be ovulating just that week..sad so that puts more stress and worry on me..sad I guess I could just go with the diaphragm and use condoms too..I just wanted a back up cause I didnt want to use condoms all the time..it totally ruins the sponteiniety and stuff..and I also feel like he doesnt want to wear them all the time..rolleyes and I want him to be happy and do what he wants too..I need to consider him as well..I know he won't say no..he is very understanding but I also get know that deep down he would rather not! haha but thank you so much for all your help! I will just have a chat with my Gp and hopefully that will go well and I will FINALLY come to a solution! haha thanks for all your help though really! I really appreciate it! smile 
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