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doctors say anxiety, I feel im completely losing myself, it that's the case.

Posted , 5 users are following.

mark82467
mark82467

I get terrible thoughts about life and existance that comes with terrible feelings makes me feel like im stuck in a scary world  and gonna go crazy as it feels like I'm believing my dark and unreal thoughts about my existance and life... sometimes I don't even know what the thoughts are but they just give me a horrible feeling of what can only be described as impending madness or impending death in a way that i feel trapped. Sometimes there that bad and scary  I feel like  staying in bed all day to try and hide from the thoughts and feelings of madness. It's horrible. I sometimes have very blurred vision and dizziness also strange feeling in hands like im not in full control of them and I miss things when I try and pick them up. This combined with the dark scary thoughts and detachment becomes a very scary place it sometimes feels like a never ending hangover but worse because the thoughts feel so real.... makes me fee like im fighting for my sanity... This makes me feel I have a physical illness rather than a mental one. Or a physical illness is causing the mental problems.

0 likes, 9 replies

9 Replies

  • allison1984
    allison1984 mark82467

    Posted

    Hi mark im sorry your going though this im having similar feelings and thoughts and i have that feeling of impending madness or death and I get a trapped feeling with this sometimes I feel that trapped i wont to run away like this would help me but I know it wont so I then feel more trapped. I dont know what your diagnosed with, ive got ocd aswell as panic attacks so I find it really super hard to not obsess about how im feeling which makes the anxiety worse. You could see your Doctor and be referred to a therapist sorry I cant offer a cure cause im still trying to find mine good luck.
    • mark82467
      mark82467 allison1984

      Posted

      Yeah I've been refered to a theropist should be with them anytime in the next few weeks been waiting months. I tried antidepressants but came off after 6 days I was getting the side affects plus the impending death/madness symptoms. Litterally went into to hospital and tried to admit myself as insane but apparently I'm not. But yeah I've definately got a form of ocd specially about over thinking I sadly though I've spent so long now obsessing over different things I'm at a point where unless I'm in total relaxation through mediation I struggle to go about daily life, I've withdrawn from most my social activities and most days I feel like im living a dream like life that it's self scares me. Hopefully one day ill break the cycle. Thanks for your comment it helps alot smile
    • michaelall35712
      michaelall35712 mark82467

      Posted

      You will learn ways to manage your anxiety.  I am not a doctor or anything, but have you looked into calming herbs?  I have heard Kava Kava or Valerian root?  You might look into these to help till you see your therapist.  Another thing I tell others is to see their GP Doctor to see if there is possibly any physiological issues.  Vitamin deficiencies or possibly irregular thyroid?
  • nathan09759
    nathan09759 mark82467

    Posted

    I used to get those symptoms too marl. What I find works best is drinking water and listening to some relaxing music like sounds of nature. Give it a go. Also talking to a close friend or relative helped me alot
  • michaelall35712
    michaelall35712 mark82467

    Posted

    Go see your doctor and have blood work done.  That way you can rule out any physiological illnesses.  Sounds like it is anxiety.  Those of us with anxiety have fearful THOUGHTS that create anxious FEELINGS.  Try writing your fearful thoughts down, and challenge how realistic they are! Thoughts are not always true, but when you put them on paper you can challenge their validity!
    • mark82467
      mark82467 michaelall35712

      Posted

      Yeah thanks for the reply, I've had all my blood work done. They came back fine I'm gonna go again though. Mine started with me becoming obsessed with my appearance is was like I hated myself I lost all self confidence. Then I started to get derealisation which would only happen in he evenings I used to drift off into this scary world everything used to cause my anxiety t get out of control sometimes just looking at the clouds would freak me out mentally. After only 5 months of this I suffered my first terrible panic attack which I ended up in hospital because my heart rate wouldn't go down I wqs that scared. They kept me in all day did all the blood tests on me and my ecg everything thing came back perfect. Anyway the derealisation carried on just coming on in the evenings usually I was anticipating it every day after work. Usually on the drive home I'd go into a world of detachment and anxiety many times I'd have a near panic attack then the symptoms would subside enough to get on with the day. Now the derealisation has kind of gone I now get obsessed thoughts about existance which is actually more terrifying than the d/R because I can't help but believe my thoughts and that scares the sh*t out of me because I know there irrational. Thanks for listening.
    • mark82467
      mark82467 michaelall35712

      Posted

      It's like one minute im okay next minute I get an odd thought then I start to believe the world isn't real???? Does this actually sound like anxiety or madness
    • michaelall35712
      michaelall35712 mark82467

      Posted

      Hello I have been there, I have suffered from them myself.  I had to distract myself when the derealization or depersonalization came.  There is a technique called grounding.  Learn to focus on something else while driving down the road, or I really recommend actually pulling over.  Take 2 deep breathes.  The reason to take breaths is because when we are anxious, we are not breathing right.  We are actually hyperventilating.   Breath in through your nose till you feel your belly poke out, that way you getting air in deep.  The release it slowly out of your mouth.  Do this a couple times.  If you still don't feel relaxed look around for something to describe to yourself.  Like a sign, notice the lettering, what it says, the colors of the letter, what style of lettering plain or cursive, neon lights or painted?  What to they make there, etc.  This is called grounding.  I also recommend that if haven't done so, seek counseling. 
    • michaelall35712
      michaelall35712 mark82467

      Posted

      You may not believe it, but you need to accept it. It is ANXIETY.  The more you fight anxiety, the worse it gets.  Accepting what it is, and challanging the odd thoughts that pop up help.  Or just learn to FLOW with the thoughts, acknowledge them and let them go, they are not real.  Our minds play tricks on us.  I have had terrorizing thoughts come in my head, and believed them. But once I made myself calm down, I was able to acknowledge it was just a thought and I would truely not act on them. 
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