Does this looks like herpes or std?

If somebody could talk to me or instruct me, Sorry for My english. Photo included.

For a long time (about three years). I've been struggling with a unkown std in My anal area.

I had sex with a Guy around february 2020 from an app, he did not cum and anything but he used saliva and there were skin touch for some minutes without condom (he tried to penetrate me for some minutes because I had much pain and I asked him to stop) the most risky sex i had ever had, (i did not notice anything different on his penis.)

The following days i did not had any fever or felt sick, only pain in The anal area due to him attempt to penetrate me, and it take a long time to heal.

After three months I started bleeding when i.had bowel movements ( about 5 times) ( this never happened again, and I never notice any mucus or discharge in my feces) The symptoms are usually assimptomatic, but when It comes, I usually feel pain in My bowel movements, mixing with burning sensation. I never had hemorrhoid, but the hemorrhoid cream usually stops the pain/sensation after three/four days ( sometimes the pain is not in the anus area itself, but around that area or in the lateral side.

This symptoms usually comes and goes around every two months, when the pain occurs, i usually see the area with skin irritation, but no ulcers or sores. I did some tests, negative to HIV/Syphilis, and I had confirmed Chlamydia and I am taking Antibiotics for both chlamydia and gonorrhea, but the now strange sensation came again and I notice this in my rectal area, does It look like Herpes? I did a IGG blood test for both HSV1 e HSV2 and I am waiting the results, i am so sad, I feel very hopeless, nobody at home knows that i am gay, I feel very devastated.

Is It possible that an hemorrhoid cream could stop herpes symptoms after a few days? Does My symptoms match with herpes std? Anyone insight i would totally appreciate.

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