Does Your Doc Spend Enough Time With You?

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Hi, Folks,

Firstly, I apologise if this is the wrong place to post this. If this is the wrong subforum, please move it to the correct place.

I'm from the UK and I assume most viewers/posters here are also from the UK and have an NHS doctor too.

I'll give a brief history of my treatment: I went to the doc around 12 months ago complaining of foul moods, low self-esteem, anxiety and desire to commit suicide. After explaining my difficulties with Fluoxetine and Citalopram in the past (which I abruptly and naively stopped taking due to the side effects,) I was prescribed 15mg Mirtazapine. This helped to improve my moods to some extent.

Back then I was asked to make fortnightly appointments with the doctor and after a few weeks they raised my dose to 30mg in the hope of improving my moods further. I was doing well with them except that my anxiety had remained the same as it was. I made a point of saying this every time and yet none of the doctors did anything but nod their heads ambiguously and said that the Mirtazapine [i:6f1c7f1bc5]should[/i:6f1c7f1bc5] be helping.

Now, 12 months on, I still complain about my nerves at my appointment every 2 months. I rarely leave the house, don't work and finished full-time education months ago. I don't claim any sort of benefits nor do I ask anything of anybody and I pay for my prescriptions. The docs keep suggesting to me that finding a job will help my self-esteem and I completely agree... but when I can't walk in to a supermarket without palpatations and gut-wrenching butterflies how do they expect me to face interviews, new people, new environments, the possibility of rejection and being taken from my comfort zones?

Perhaps I make the mistake of saying, \"I'm doing fine,\" when I walk in to the doc's office because more often than not, I'm in and out of his/her office in under 90 seconds. I smile and avoid making sob stories because it isn't what the doc wants to hear and I hate disappointing people. My life situation is not making me want to kill myself but making me not want to live. (Sounds the same, but it's slightly different.)

Sometimes I feel like I'm not worth the doc's time and that I don't merit any sort of professional's attention because I cannot attribute my feelings to a life event (e.g. rape/abuse). My nervous nature also makes it difficult to voice how I feel when I do see the doc.

Does anybody else share any of these experiences?

P.S. sorry for the depressing essay.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hello there. I'm sorry that you are having a rough time. Are you a young person having just finished full time education and living at home? You need to try to be a bit more proactive and ask for what you need. Do you plan to go back to full/part time education? Many colleges and unis have good pastoral care and will help you plan the course that you wish to study if that is what you want. Next time you go to the docs book a double appointment. That way you will have more time to ask for what you need ie an appointment with a psychiatrist or to go on the waiting list for CBT. These things do take time and it is easy to feel frustrated. You might also ask for the support of the Community Psychiatric service. Locally Mind have offices up and down the country who might be able to offer day to day support. I have also found support from the Depressives Anonymous they might have changed their name but they have local groups which could provide support socially and for discussions. Ours meets in the local Priory hospital. Good luck ask for what you need take a list if necessary. I hope you begin to feel better soon.
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  • Posted

    I was thinking of Depression Alliance. They have groups all over the UK. Depressives Anonymous has become Depression UK.
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  • Posted

    Anon , do you know something. I have just read your post, ( and even althought i can attribute soem things to my anxiety, in my eyes, they are by now way enough) You hit the nail on the head when stating that you [b:0900ac775e](dont want to kill yourself, yet this condition is preventing you living. I get attcks of what if this happens when I am out, what if .....? and then panic and stop me, on the other side of that I get, Ill never know if I dont do......then, if I do and there is a price to pay, I get; if only I had not, then guil guilt guilt/ God I dont know if any of you (or Anon) understand, but I know what I am trying to say.Do you?

    My wrists feel sore an I want to go back to bed. Anon, we can face our fears together, take care

    [/b:0900ac775e]

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  • Posted

    To Tiny tears: there is help out there. We might not like the help that is on offer but at some time in our lives when we face the fact that we are ill and accept yes accept help. That might mean inconveniencing ourselves and juggling our busy lives to attend a support group or cbt or whatever it is. That or accepting a half life of limitations and repeating patterns that make us ill. I think that my answer to 'does your doctor spend enough time with you? in my case I have more than my fair share of my GPS time. My psychiatrist is slightly different we pay him to treat and look after me. He usually responds to my phone calls not usually in person but I do have the feeling that he is keeping tabs on me and my illness. I do not have a cpn. I do know that some people are dealt a rotton card from the NHS mental health teams. I have also met some really awful psychiatrists in my time. Some doctors just want to dismiss you as ill or mad some it's a language thing and you come out feeling very desperate and despairing. So I do understand I have had treatment both as an NHS patient and prvately. Some has been very good some not so good. You just have to make the best of what is available and if what you want isn't available through the usual channels to try 'Mind' and other voluntary organisations. There are a lot of good people trying to improve our mental health out there as well as the c.... ones. Pooh
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  • Posted

    Sorry - dont want to be missunderstood. Anon just sounds like me. It was the I am doing fine bit that she/he mentioned. Of late Ive tried to be more open about my feelings with both my cpn and doc - but really neither seem to have the time (and I dont blame them coz they proabably dont) . My point was, that it is a difficult thing to treat, do you accept that this is how it is going to be from now on? Obviously there are a few lifestyle changes that I could address, however fear and habit are 2 very difficult things to switch, and once nerves kick in , your on a sinking ship. So my point was not to get at the NHs or anyone who has helped me, my point was to state that Anon, is not alone, and nerves are hard to overcome.
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