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Don't lose hope!

Posted , 2 users are following.

katie10733
katie10733

I was diagnosed with hsv2 almost a month ago and I was open and honest with the guy I was seeing and he still wants to date me. This virus sucks but I'm still hopeful. I look at things differently since having this but staying busy really helps. Plus I'm on suppressive therapy and no ourbreaks at all! Doctor still told me to get my blood tested in another month just to be sure. smile I still get down sometimes when I see my friends in relationships without herpes and they don't have to worry about it. But things are still okay and I found a GREAT man...smile people will accept you for this. Just have to be honest.

0 likes, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • m28548
    m28548 katie10733

    Posted

    Hi Katie.  I contracted hsv2  three and a half months ago.  I haven't had sex with anyone since -- but I was starting to see someone when the doctor diagnosed me.  After about a month of hanging out and going on dates, I told him about it and he took it a lot better than I expected.  We're still seeing each other but haven't gotten physical.  Although he says that my condition isn't the reason that he's holding back physically and that he just wants to take it slow....I can't help but have that feeling in the back of my mind. I am also on supporessive therapy and have not had any episodes since my initial OB.  That gives me hope in feeling like I'm still normal -- but the longer we go without him even trying that makes me feel diseased all over again.

    Reading your story does give me hope.  How did you bring it up with him?  How did he react?  I'm starting to second guess the guy I am seeing for other reasons -- we don't have the same views on some important topics.  But the idea of telling anyone else or entering the dating scene with this disease terrifies me.

    • katie10733
      katie10733 m28548

      Posted

      Wow our stories are pretty similar. I haven't had sex yet either and am also on suppressive therapy. But the guy I'm seeing has done a ton of research since the day I told him. He was always understanding because he likes me for me. He told me its really not that bad as our society makes it out to be. There is a huge stigma. He told me HE is the one who wants to have sex. Being safe with protection obviously. Nothing has changed with him and I since I told him. I feel like its actually made us stronger. I'm nervous for sex sinxe I was diagnosed but I'm hoping it goes okay. Just have to get past the over thinking part wink
    • katie10733
      katie10733

      Posted

      I told him by just sitting down with him and straight up telling him. No way to beat around the bush so I just told him.never been more damn nervous in my life haha but once it was over with I felt a weight lifted off. And researching facts about it has made me alot more comfortable
    • m28548
      m28548 katie10733

      Posted

      When I told him, I felt like I was rambling a bit, when when I was done, he just looked at me and was like "is that it?" -- it definitely felt like a weight lifted.  Maybe more guys are understanding than I might think.  I opened up to my sister, and she said that she actually has had it for 6 years.  She's one of the lucky ones and is asymptomatic, but she has still told partners before getting physical.  Some guys have been really accepting, and she said one guy did make her feel disgusting.  Considering I had an initial OB, I'm nervous to know if I will never suffer outbreaks or if I will have them moving forward.  I know that everyone reacts so differently to the virus and the unknown is the scariest part.

      It's good that the guy you are seeing has expressed that he WANTS to be physical with you.  Just puts the ball in your court and he is moving at your pace.  It's refreshing to hear that he took the initiative to research it himself.   Maybe there are more promising guys out there.  I know that there is so much more to a relationship than sex, but I hate that him not wanting to makes me feel unattractive and unwanted.

    • katie10733
      katie10733 m28548

      Posted

      Good thing we are on suppressive therapy so hopefully we won't have to deal with an outbreak ever. Yeah I'm sure we will come across people who will make us feel nasty but just gotta brush it off when the time comes. I've only told a handful of people. It's crazy your sis had it for 6 years before you found out. Has your guy done any research?? My guy would send me articles and videos and stuff that he read sometimes haha. That's how he became more comfortable with sleeping with me. Maybe your guy should research more? It seemed to have helped! Girl I totally understand about the unattractive and not feeling wanted part. When i first found out and still today feel that way sometimes. It sinks in more when I'm alone at home at night and I see girls in public all happy haha but then I take a deep breath and keep busy!
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