Fear of the unknown

Best thing that ever happened, especially after D & C, multiple times, nothing helped with floods and clots, let alone pain, eventually had haemorrhage, at home, 3 units of blood later, gave me hormones to stop flooding, only made me sick as a dog, vomiting all night, another D & C done the following day, sent home.

2 days later got a phone call from the hospital saying come back urgently, endo cancer, after that feet didn't touch ground, lots of tests, x-rays, scans, etc, then surgery 10 days later in bigger base hospital with more senior team.

?I still remember the Dr asking me about losing my uterus, and ability to have children, HAHAHAHAHA, I laughed at him, at 51, I DON'T THINK SO.

?End result never been better since, saving in sanitary products noticeable in family budget.

I understand what you're going through.  Having a hysterectomy is not the end of the world.  I think that most people aren't ready for how their lives change as they age, but they learn to adapt.  And, that's so important, because if you don't adapt, and expect life to continue on as it has been, you miss out on the joy that is waiting for you.  Different experiences.  But the joy is there, nonetheless. You can still be there for your children, as you said, they're not children any longer.   

Also, once your children are adults, sooner or later they learn that sometimes they have to be strong for and support their parents. Though the experience can be harrowing for them, they still need it as part of the maturing process. You can be honest about how you feel and the reality of what you're going through.  And, that's such a blessing.  You become a person to them, and not "just mum." 

Your emotions are part of the "passage" of this experience.  They're not "wrong or right."  You are feeling them for a reason.  To suppress them makes what you're going through more difficult. So, let them out.  

Best of luck to you! xx

I had a hysterectomy in December 2017 at age 54. I had put it off a few years thinking I would feel better plus had a D&C. I did not feel better until I had the hysterectomy. I have not personally met anyone that regretted having a hysterectomy. Usually they say they wish they had done it years ago. Of course, there are risks to surgery and recovery can be challenging but there are risks to no surgery. I try to stay positive and realize how much better these surgeries are than previous generations and thankful this is a treatment option even available to us. Good luck with your decision.