Fear of the unknown

Posted , 7 users are following.

Hi ladies lm trying to make my mind up on hysterectomy opp,waiting for the date, l dont feel a lost of my womb to me its a empty cage giving me pain, lm 49  in Peri and a had my family with grandchildren too but as you can see from my other post feeling low about things not sure if its the Peri or the thought of the opp looming a head and the things what will change.. lm not good with change of any kind l like things settled in my life but at my time of life looks like a whole lots changing.No wonder we feel lost when we have to keep it all going for our family but our body has other ideas and will stops us in our tracks to say wait l need some attention dont l !! ....... if you have grown up children it might be the time to step back and not be a mum but a person going though a hard time.lm lucky l have grown up girls who both had children so they know but it is so hard to step of that mum ladder and  be a person when they still see you as just mum and you have to be strong for them xxx

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11 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi.  I had that same feeling before having tvh.  I had a thought of cancelling my sched many times but i kept praying snd that made me strong and ready.  I also have grown up kids snd they helped me during period of recovery.  I know it’s hard for mums but it has to happen.  Just be strong and positive.  You will be good snd well.
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  • Posted

    Best thing that ever happened, especially after D & C, multiple times, nothing helped with floods and clots, let alone pain, eventually had haemorrhage, at home, 3 units of blood later, gave me hormones to stop flooding, only made me sick as a dog, vomiting all night, another D & C done the following day, sent home.

    2 days later got a phone call from the hospital saying come back urgently, endo cancer, after that feet didn't touch ground, lots of tests, x-rays, scans, etc, then surgery 10 days later in bigger base hospital with more senior team.

    ?I still remember the Dr asking me about losing my uterus, and ability to have children, HAHAHAHAHA, I laughed at him, at 51, I DON'T THINK SO.

    ?End result never been better since, saving in sanitary products noticeable in family budget.

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    • Posted

      Hi bless you l do hope you are well now l had blood tran and lining of womb removed so l think next thing is the big opp it been booked just waiting now take care hugs x
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  • Posted

    I understand what you're going through.  Having a hysterectomy is not the end of the world.  I think that most people aren't ready for how their lives change as they age, but they learn to adapt.  And, that's so important, because if you don't adapt, and expect life to continue on as it has been, you miss out on the joy that is waiting for you.  Different experiences.  But the joy is there, nonetheless. You can still be there for your children, as you said, they're not children any longer.   

    Also, once your children are adults, sooner or later they learn that sometimes they have to be strong for and support their parents. Though the experience can be harrowing for them, they still need it as part of the maturing process. You can be honest about how you feel and the reality of what you're going through.  And, that's such a blessing.  You become a person to them, and not "just mum." 

    Your emotions are part of the "passage" of this experience.  They're not "wrong or right."  You are feeling them for a reason.  To suppress them makes what you're going through more difficult. So, let them out.  

    Best of luck to you! xx

     

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    • Posted

      Hi what wise and kind words thankyou x this site is so great as we can tell all us ladies about things we cant get across to our love ones, or we dont want as might upset them even tho its us who are the upset ones on our bad days,l dont want my girls to worry about me but at the same time need them to be there for me, l have it in my head lam mum so l should be the strong one but like l said lm a person to going through a hard time ATM but lm feeling better today just going on here has helped x
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  • Posted

    I had a hysterectomy in December 2017 at age 54. I had put it off a few years thinking I would feel better plus had a D&C. I did not feel better until I had the hysterectomy. I have not personally met anyone that regretted having a hysterectomy. Usually they say they wish they had done it years ago. Of course, there are risks to surgery and recovery can be challenging but there are risks to no surgery. I try to stay positive and realize how much better these surgeries are than previous generations and thankful this is a treatment option even available to us. Good luck with your decision.

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    • Posted

      Thanks you your post l had missed 2 periods so my mind was telling me maybe l dont need it after all but it came back and painful with the fibroids so l think its for the best l have the opp but was kind of hoping nature was dealing with it and taking me through the menopause as this happened to my sister she had her opp all booked but then went through menopause so no need for one.l cant wait for this as l ave blot clots and lm on blood thinners for life so looks like it will be op will be going ahead, once again thanks for you post it helped.
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    • Posted

      Hi bws912.  I am 62 amd had tvh ovaries removed with upper/post repair.  I am now 3 months post op and having terrible insomia with full body shaking at same time bp start to raise. Daytime is good though sleepy, but not bedtime.    I am due seeing my doctor 2nd week next month and waiting is too long for me.  

      Anyone having this kind of feeling?  is this normal?  Am scared!

      Thankk you.

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    • Posted

      I used to get this during night often beginning @ age 44. Even the bp increase during these events. It stopped when I started low dose of beta blocker. I also have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis. My thoughts are to get physical exam with blood work, check thyroid function including antibodies, and possibly have your heart checked out by cardiologist. I had pvcs which eventually turned to atrial fibrillation for which I had heart ablation 10 months ago. I never pinpointed exact cause for waking up shaking but it doesn’t happen anymore. I am 54 now had hysterectomy 5 months ago. 
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  • Posted

    Hard life decisions, pray and stay strong. This too shall pass
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