Feel like back to square on is this normal?

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Been on 10mg citalopram for nearly 7 weeks for intrusive thoughts and anxiety caused by zopiclone withdrawal. Wasn't doing too bad, did have the odd day when felt more hopeful, but this afternoon been awful intrusive thoughts and anxiety through the roof. Is this normal am beginning to wonder if the citalopram will ever work. Is it normal to have on OK day then have awful day can never predict how I'm going to be from one day to the next. Some days can cope OK with the thoughts but today feel really low. Don't really want to increase dose as the side effects were pretty bad when I first started them.

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16 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi again Lemanna

    Yes its perfectly normal to feel really bad after you've had an ok day. Its all part of recovery. Its called a setback / blip. The anxiety will come and go for a while yet as 7 weeks is still very early. The intrusive thoughts will come back too because they're a side effect of anxiety.

    It does get better.

    K x

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    • Posted

      Thanks as ever for your support Katie. just get despondent as the thoughts are still there all the time just seem to cope with them better some days than others. tried CBT but made me feel worse. Did you find the meds did eventually stop the thoughts as therapy hasn't really helped. i'm working my way through the book you recommended trying to put it into practice. I think best to stay on 10MG just get bit low not noticing more improvement yet but have read recovery is non linear.

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    • Posted

      Lemanna

      When I recovered the thoughts were the last symptom to disappear for me (might be different for you). But of course as I progressed through recovery the thoughts got easier.

      Mornings are always the worst - and whatever your morning is like, however difficult it is, this is not an indication how the rest of your day will turn out.

      No I didn’t get on with therapy at all and yes it was the medication that worked for me - they healed my anxiety which stopped the thoughts. It made it easier when I learnt about anxiety but needed to the meds too because I'd been ill for such a long time, and what I learnt became more apparent as I got better.

      Remember you only have these thoughts because they are a side effect of anxiety - anxiety produces them.

      Don’t look for improvement - it’ll happen without you realising it.

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  • Posted

    i could have written your post word for word .. i feel exactly the same .. im just over 4 weeks in on 20mg and have had odd days or hours where ive felt like me and full of hope but then i have days when the anxiety and blackness and intrusive horrible thoughts are so bad and scary i dont think im ever going to get better ! is this normal ? i feel like im cracking up 

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    • Posted

      Good to know I'm not only one. I know everyone says can take while for them to kick in but so hard while you're waiting. Every morning wake up thinking today I'll feel bit better ;[

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  • Posted

    it will .. im feeling more good days now bit when i have a bad one i feel like im going backwards .. not easy to tell yourself its just a bad day bit im trying .. stay strong .. we will get there x

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    • Posted

      Hi Kelly, how are you doing? Having a really bad week this week for some reason. Husband getting very cross with me. Hoping the meds aren't making it worse. Just get very frustrated at 7 weeks not making lot of progress yet!

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  • Posted

    hey Lemanna, I am just wondering how you are doing now i am starting week 4 on 20 mg. As I am in same situation now as well. With good days and bad days and horrible intrusive thoughts. So annoying hope it will stop.

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    • Posted

      Hi lala, not doing well I'm afraid, went back to my doctor as citalopram making my hair fall out, and actually making me feel worse as time goes on. Awful intrusive thoughts still. Having blood test to check not thyroid which don't think it is. I'm trying sertraline which seems to be more effective for intrusive thoughts, also can't go on loosing my hair. Hope you are improving, does seem trial and error finding the right med and dosage. Just think after 8 weeks shouldn't be getting worse. Good luck!

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  • Posted

    I'm right there with you. I'm coming up on my 5th week and some days are definitely better than others. Some days I wake up thinking wow, I'm starting to be my normal self again. Then the next, I feel like I'm back where I started and it's hard to even leave the house. I can't even make any plans because I don't know how I'll feel from one day to the next.

    The book I'm reading says we shouldn't try and fight or stop our anxious thoughts but practice welcoming them and accepting them. And keep telling your obsessive thoughts "So what". And eventually should help overcome the fear of them. I'm trying to put it into practice myself.

    Just know you're not alone in your thoughts and you'll get through this!

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    • Posted

      Don't think they generally advise keep swapping meds mine was because of hair loss which stopped after finished citalopram. Try it for while longer the go to doctor if you don't notice any improvement. I've got several help books but the mentally telling yourself just accept the thoughts never worked fir me but give it try.

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    • Posted

      Previous post didnt appear for some reason. i had to swap to sertraline. The citalopram made my hair fall out thankfully OK once I stopped it. Hoping it works as recommended for OCD type symptoms. i never found the suggestions telling yourself they're just thoughts and accepting them worked for me but seems meds do eventually help. i would have stayed on the citalopram but couldn'T cope with hair loss. Mental symptoms are awful aren't they. Hope you soon improve.

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    • Posted

      Yes they are! One minute you're fine and the next you can barely get out of bed. It's crazy what anxiety can do to you. I hope the sertraline works better for you 🙏

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    • Posted

      Hope you soon improve as well. I probably would have stuck it out on the citalopram, but around 6/7 week mark noticed my hair was getting very thin and falling out, it is listed as side effect. Back to square one with a new med which is a right pain I'm trying the full tablet tonight as just been taking half up to now, lot trial & error!!

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    • Posted

      I hear you!! I've been noticing my hair thinning out also. I thought it was bc of all the stress of the anxiety but now I'm wondering if it's the Citalopram

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    • Posted

      It'S tricky as anxiety can affect hair. My hair just wasn't growing and coming out lot every time i washed it. If you are worried worth having blood test check it'S nothing else. It def was citalopram with me but doesnt necessarily mean it'S same for you.

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