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As you know from my last post I am suffering from OCD depression and anxiety. I'm too scared to talk to someone. Everyone keeps asking me at school why I am acting so different, I'm so tired of it. One minute I'll be fine then one minute I'll be crying or yelling at someone. My temper has gotten shorter. I tell myself that I am giving up on trying, it's hard to fight this constant fight with my self, it's tiring. One minute I am happy and then the next I'm sad, I always wake up telling my self I am going to force my self to have a good day but it's hard, it's hard too hold it all in so I come here to rant. I don't want my boyfriend to get tired of me telling him that I am depressed, and he thinks it's his fault that I am depressed and I feel so bad. It's not his fault of course. I'm scared I'm going to lose him and I'm tired of fighting this fight with my self. It feels like there is a happy side too me and a sad side that are in a competition and the sad side keeps winning. I feel like I'm worthless and I just got a job at a nursing home as an Stna and I'm scared that'll stress me out even more.
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