Feel Trapped

I work a nice job with good insurance considering its flipping burgers, but ive felt increasingly trapped recently due to my dependancy on the insurance because of my type one diabetes. They rely on me a lot where i work and I have a lot of pressure on me every day to perform well and clean up after others. I just had a really bad day and brought it home to my fiancee and long story short i need to leave but am scared of being able to afford my appointment and insulin payments without insurance. ive dealt with depression and anxiety for about 5 years now and i stopped taking medicine a long time ago. recently its been back in full force and i find it hard to function and perform the way everyone at my job and my home expect me to and it seems like im stuck between a rock and a hard place and am having a very hard time figuring out what to do. I dont have family to rely on, dad is gone and mom is a mess, and the rest of my family lives across the country. I keep feeling a dread every day i wake up and sometimes i wish my diabetes would just put me in a coma so i wouldnt have to worry about it anymore. every day is the same anxious and angry cycle and i hate myself when i bring it home. help

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