Feeling frustrated!

Posted , 5 users are following.

I had my first herpes outbreak the first week of July, during that time I didn't know it was that and went to the doctor and confirmed it was. I was initially extremely upset, because I wasn't sure how I got it when my partner said they were all clear and they tested negative even after us having unprotected sex. I came to terms with it, but some days I feel horrible when I scroll on social media and see people talking really bad about people with herpes. It makes me feel low and less of a person who don't have it. Is there any advice to help. I don't even want to see a therapist because I am so embarrassed and afraid to be judged. I am feeling lost and hopeless. I really need help... Some days I want to end it all just because of one simple stupid mistake. 😦

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2 Replies

  • Posted

    i know how you feel, i also have recently been diagnosed.. and have research the topic like crazy. its gonna take time but one day at a time.. i think the most important thing to remind yourself is that it really is just a skin condition, nothing more, nothing less. people who judge are just uneducated on herpes, it comes with a huge stigma. also remember, those people who are judging.. most of them will have the herpes virus and they just dont know they have it.

    now that you have tested positive, you are automatically already a safer partner than those who dont know they have it, cos you can look out for warning signs of the virus reactivating itself

    stay strong #wegotthis

  • Edited

    For whatever reason, a few days after i was diagnosed i was just over it. i understand the self hatred but honestly its not your fault. you can have the virus in your system for years without having an outbreak so it is quite possible you got it elsewhere. either way, you got it from someone else which makes that on them and not on you. the best way to look at it for me was like this. i cried as soon as i left the doctors office because of the feelings you're having. i found it reassuring when i spoke with ex partners whom i know have had sex with way more people than i. i already had a therapist and that also really helped. therapists aren't there to judge you, they're there to help you. my therapist was like dang that does suck, how can we get through this. just remember there are so many worse things that could happen. when i initially went to the doctor i truly thought i was dying because of how painful it was. while i will have this disease forever, it really doesn't change a whole lot. no one has to know unless you want to tell them. it is just so common tho. i felt like i had to tell my mom because she was there for me through all the pain. she basically knew before i did, and while i was so embarrassed to tell her, she reacted much like my therapist and was like okay so what are the next steps. i really hope you have someone in your life you can trust like this. i highly recommend looking for a therapist tho.

    i will also say that a few days after this diagnosis, i was in a really bad car accident that was caused by someone else and i could have been severely injured but walked away without a scratch. this really helped to put it in perspective. things could be so much worse. does it suck? absolutely. it's just not the end of the world. we will live. we may even be stronger for it.

    don't give up!

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